• Michelle Williams knows how challenging it is to be a working mother.
• She says balancing her career and motherhood is like figuring out "which master you're going to serve."
• "Because the truth is, if work is going well, somebody else is taking care of the kids," she said.

Michelle Williams knows balancing her acting career with being a mom is tough.

During a Monday appearance on the "Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard" podcast, Williams, 44, shared how she juggles life as a mother of four while keeping her acting career on track.

"Kids are such great life checkers. They force you to put your best self in front of them," she told podcast host Dax Shepard. "You can't abdicate your life and your work and your own desires, but you do have to put them in check and figure out which master you're going to serve."

The "Brokeback Mountain" star welcomed her first child, Matilda, in 2005 with her then-boyfriend, the late actor Heath Ledger. In 2020, she married director Thomas Kail, with whom she shares three children.

For her, being a working mom is about striking a careful balance — never letting her kids or her career go "unattended for too long."

"Because the truth is, if work is going well, somebody else is taking care of the kids. And if you're in a high point with your kids, the work is shoved to the side," Williams said.

"You can't be equally good at them at the exact same time, and you have to allow for that give and take, but then also replenish the other things. If you have a big period of being at home, you need to go back to what you've left unattended and put some light over there," she continued.

Williams says she also wants her kids to grow up seeing their mom work, which makes it hard to step away from her career for too long. However, the pull of being a mother is hard to resist.

"My best day with my children is better than my best day at work. I am more thrilled with that high than I am with a work high," she said.

This isn't Williams's first time speaking about being a working mom.

"So you have to figure it out because we have to stay in the workforce, even though it often feels like it's untenable. My heart obviously belongs to my children; they tug at it the most. But I really want to be able to have both," she told Entertainment Weekly in a January 2023 interview.

Other female Hollywood stars have also spoken up about balancing their personal and professional lives.

Naomi Watts, 56, said she tried freezing her eggs when she was in her early 30s to focus on her career.

"Because I came into it late — at least with my launching — I was told to work, work, work because it'll all be dried up at 40," Watts told Katie Couric in a January interview.

Cameron Diaz, who took a decadelong hiatus from Hollywood, said she spent those 10 years "trying to stay alive just like every other mother."

During Fortune's Most Powerful Women Summit 2024, she elaborated on her decision to stop acting.

"It really comes to: What are you passionate about? For me, it was to build my family," Diaz said.

A representative for Williams did not immediately respond to a request for comment sent by Business Insider outside regular hours.

• I'm a registered dietitian and mom of two who's an executive member at Costco.
• My husband and I shop there for snacks our whole family can enjoy.
• We love Medjool dates, sweet potato sticks, and mandarin oranges.

As a registered dietitian and mom of two toddlers, snacks aren't just nice to have — they're a must.

My husband and I work from home and are always looking for quick snack options to grab between meetings or to toss into snack trays, baby bags, or the car console.

I like to keep things simple, so the best snacks in our house check three boxes: quality ingredients, durable enough to be thrown in a bag, and most importantly, something my kids will actually eat.

Costco is one of our favorite places to shop, and I love to make the most of our executive membership. Here are 12 of our favorite snacks the whole family enjoys.

Simple Mills almond flour crackers are our favorite pair-with-anything snack.

We love Simple Mills almond flour crackers for their straightforward ingredients and the 2 grams of fiber they provide per serving.

These crackers pair well with everything from cheese and tuna salad to hummus. They're also gluten-free, which helps when we're packing snacks to share with friends who have allergies or sensitivities.

SnakYard organic sweet potato sticks are chewy perfection.

My 1-year-old loves the texture of these sweet potato sticks. They're subtly sweet, soft, a little chewy, and made with just one ingredient, which makes them a great choice for her while she's teething.

We also love bringing them to playdates since they're allergen-free.

Wildbrine raw organic sauerkraut is perfect for a probiotic kick.

I love crunchy, tangy things, so it's no surprise my kids do, too. I often pack a little sauerkraut in my 3-year-old's snack tray, and at home, we'll toss it on scrambled eggs or serve it as a quick side.

Before kids, I used to make my own sauerkraut, but now that I'm short on time, having an easy, store-bought option feels like a small parenting win.

We love the versatility of Natural Delights fresh Medjool dates.

Dates are a gem in our household because they're so versatile and mess-free. I'll pop them into the snack tray, stuff them with cheese or nut butter, or use them to make our weekly chia seed pudding.

The Country Archer beef minis are my go-to protein on busy mornings.

I'm always trying to balance our snacks with some protein or fat, and these mini beef sticks make it easy.

The ingredients are clean and simple, with no preservatives, nitrates, sugar, or other fillers you sometimes find in meat sticks.

The That's It mini fruit bars are a no-mess, allergy-friendly win.

This is another snack that's great for school, playdates, or keeping in the car. They're just fruit — literally, that's it.

I like that the bars are chewy without being sticky or crumbly, and they hold up well no matter where we stash them.

Kerrygold Dubliner cheese is a hit with both toddlers and grownups.

Kerrygold Dubliner cheese has the richness of an aged cheddar with a slightly nutty and sweet finish. It's perfect for the toddler snack tray and holds its own on our grown-up cheese board, too.

We like to slice the block up at the beginning of the week and keep the pieces in a jar to savor throughout the week.

Siete grain-free cinnamon churro strips are a treat we all feel good about.

We like to call these the "dessert chips" in our house. Siete's cinnamon churro strips have the perfect amount of sweetness and are made with cassava flour and no refined sugar.

The Unreal dark chocolate coconut minis have a nostalgic flavor.

I loved Mounds as a kid, and the Unreal dark chocolate coconut minis are a snack I can feel good about.

They're made with just three ingredients and none of the fillers you often find in candy. The dark chocolate is made with real chocolate liquor, which gives it a rich, deep flavor that feels a little more grown-up.

BelGioioso fresh mozzarella snacking cheese is perfectly pre-portioned.

The texture of fresh mozzarella is firm enough for little hands, which makes it easy to throw in the snack tray for my oldest or slice up for my 1-year-old.

We like adding it to salads and other meals during the week, too, and enjoy that it comes in pre-portioned balls of three.

Jackson's sweet potato chips satisfy our salty cravings.

My husband and I love crunchy and savory snacks. Jackson's chips are simple and made with lightly salted sweet potatoes with avocado oil.

Mandarin oranges are an easy grab-and-go snack.

Mandarin oranges are always in our weekly rotation because they're easy to peel, no mess, and full of vitamin C. We keep a bowl on the counter so we can grab a few when we head out the door.

Click to keep reading Costco diaries like this one.

• I had my first two kids when I was married but I always wanted a third child.
• I decided to adopt when they were headed to college, and I was 47.
• I was surprised by the way people reacted to my decision.

When I adopted my youngest child as an infant in 2001, I was in my 40s, and my older kids were heading off to college. I couldn't wait to tell everyone about our expanding family. But the reaction wasn't what I'd anticipated.

The first time I was expecting a baby, I was 29 and married. My parents were ecstatic, and Mom handed the phone to my usually stoic dad. He laughed and peppered me with questions like, "Have you picked out names?" Mom retold the story of her long labor and hoped I'd have an easier time.

My best friend Christine had just found out she was pregnant, and we joked our newborns would be raised like twins. Shopping for maternity clothes, the saleswoman patted my belly. "What is your due date?" she whispered.

So, when I broke the news almost two decades later that an adoption agency had matched me with a newborn girl, I waited for "Congratulations!" Instead, I got, "Haven't you been through all that already?"

Adopting at my age seemed like a taboo

Hitting the reset button on motherhood, it seemed, was taboo. Especially for a 47-year-old single mom of two teens.

At a party, a guest I barely knew pulled me aside. Gayle, in her 60s, had a worried look. "Let me ask you something," she said. "What made you do this?"

Do this? You'd think I'd been arrested. Did I even owe an explanation?

I had always wanted another baby

I'd always longed for a third child, yet by the time my youngest was off to kindergarten, my marriage was unraveling. The thought of being on my own was scary enough with two children.

But the divorce and carpooling years didn't quell my yearning to clasp another tiny hand, cuddle with a picture book, and go to swim lessons and the zoo. "Is this just a phase?" I asked an older coworker.

"Listen to your heart," she confided. "I wanted a third child, but my husband didn't. I still regret it."

Soon after, my friend Kevin and his wife were showing pictures of the little girl waiting for them in Guatemala. My heart melted.

"I'd love to adopt," I sighed. "But I wouldn't be eligible."

"Why not?" he said, giving me his agency's number.

Kevin's caseworker, a soft-spoken mother of two adopted from Korea, laid out options: domestic vs. international and requirements from age to religion.

It was finally the right time for me to adopt

By now, I'd changed fields and gone into mortgage banking. I had a higher income, which made it easier to handle the extra expenses that came with a child without a partner, and my older ones were excited to welcome a sibling; the chance to hold another baby in my arms seemed within reach.

Soon after, on the grocery checkout line, I saw a magazine commemorating 25 years since the war had ended in Vietnam, one of the countries recommended by the agency. I saw this as a sign of hope. When all the paperwork was complete and a nurse put Isabella in my arms in Hanoi in 2001, I knew I'd made the right choice to "start over" with this bundle of love.

Today, Isabella is a happy 23-year-old grad student. She plays varsity tennis and is studying for the law school admissions test. She shares her off-campus apartment with a cat and a labradoodle. We love hikes through state parks, and she asks my advice on work, clothes, and dating. Besides her birthday, we celebrate her adoption date with a cake and candles.

When friends and strangers remark how lucky she was to be adopted, I reply, "No, you mean what a lucky mom I am. I'm blessed to have had a second chance at motherhood."

• I returned to work when my son was 6 months old but didn't get a full-time job until he was 5.
• As a single mom, I learned that working one full-time job actually wasn't for me.
• I preferred the flexibility that working multiple part-time jobs gave me.

As a single mom, I returned to work when my son was 6 months old but didn't take on a full-time position until he was 5. During the first few years of his life, I managed multiple part-time gigs, including cleaning homes and offices, teaching yoga classes, doing childcare at a pre-k, and working at the library. At one point, I even started pet-sitting. I still managed to work 40 hours a week with all these jobs combined, but working multiple part-time jobs allowed me to spend the most amount of time with my son.

During that time, I was still taking online classes and working on completing my degree. The plan was to eventually obtain a teaching position once my son started kindergarten and was in school for most of the day. I didn't want to work a 9-to-5 job before then because I wanted to spend as much time with my son as possible while he was very young. By working a few different jobs, I was able to make my own schedule and work mostly — if not completely — when my son was with his father.

If I did have to work when my son was with me, I did so only while he was in his morning pre-kindergarten class.

Designing my schedule, feeling like my own boss, and working multiple positions actually felt really good. Since I have a lot of interests, I liked getting to teach yoga classes a few times a week and also spend some time working at the library. I even enjoyed my time cleaning, as I found it therapeutic and rewarding, because it felt like I was helping people.

Money wasn't overly tight, but I sometimes wished I had more income. The biggest downside was that I didn't have the benefits of a full-time position, mainly health insurance. At the time, my income was high enough that I myself did not qualify for Medicaid, but low enough that my son did still qualify. I knew he'd lose that coverage once he turned 5. I thought that when I became a teacher, I would not only be making more money, but I would feel more secure in finally having benefits for my son and me.

I quickly regretted taking on a full-time position

I was hired as a teacher when my son was halfway through Florida's voluntary pre-kindergarten program and would be starting kindergarten in the fall. I was relieved at first to have only one job to keep track of, but it didn't take long for me to realize I wasn't thrilled with the change I'd made. Even though my son was now in kindergarten for most of the day, I still had to sign him up for aftercare, as his day was over at 2 p.m., but mine wasn't over until 4. I didn't like being unable to pick him up at the end of his school day like I once had. Even though I was working the same amount of hours before I started teaching, it was the first time I felt the pangs of working motherhood.

I was proud of myself for being able to get benefits for both of us, but by the time the health coverage was taken out of my paycheck and I paid for my son's aftercare, I was making the same exact amount of money as I was before I started teaching. It was a bitter pill to feel as though I hadn't increased my income at all and was now spending less time with my son on top of it. I wasn't as happy on a personal level, and that affected my mood outside work.

After six years in my full-time job, I went back to working part-time jobs

I was surprised that I felt far less fulfilled from teaching than I did when I had a variety of roles. Even though I enjoyed aspects of the job, I wasn't used to having to be in any one place for that long every day. Sometimes, I would actually feel bored and catch myself fantasizing about the life I had given up. For sacrificing those after-school afternoons with my son, I wasn't even any better off financially. Most of all, it killed me that I wasn't as happy as I was when I worked in a handful of different roles.

Eventually, after six years of teaching, I accepted that full-time work wasn't the right choice for me as a mom. I've learned that working several small jobs ultimately works better for me than one traditional full-time job, but I wouldn't have known it wasn't the right fit for me without trying it.

Unfortunately, it's difficult to find a part-time job that offers health insurance benefits. If I had not remarried a few years ago, I might have had to continue teaching simply for health coverage, but my son and I are now covered through my husband's job. I've returned to working part-time, and my overall income is less on paper, but I feel like the energy I'm regaining and can put back into motherhood is more than well worth it.

• I often save money on groceries for my family of six by shopping at Aldi each week.
• We love the price and taste of the Friendly Farms Greek yogurt, whole milk, and string cheese.
• I'll usually grab a bag of sweet potatoes and frozen Freemont Fish Market salmon and fish sticks.

I'm a busy mom, and I love finding great deals on groceries so I can affordably make healthy meals to fuel my family.

One of my favorite ways to do so is by shopping at Aldi, which I've done ever since my first son was born. Now, I buy groceries there for myself, my husband, and our four kids ranging in age from 9 months to 6 years.

The budget grocer has some great prices (especially on dairy products), and its small, organized layout allows me to shop efficiently.

Here's what I buy my family on weekly Aldi shopping trips.

Fremont Fish Market fish sticks are my kids' all-time favorite dinner.

Of all the fish sticks we've tried across many grocery stores, Aldi's Fremont Fish Market wild-caught breaded ones are the winner in our house.

They make a tasty, easy dinner for kids, and with 10 grams of protein per serving, we know they're getting a hearty main dish. I plate these with fruit or veggies for a more complete meal.

And at just $5.25 for about 41 sticks, we usually keep a few boxes of these in the freezer.

I buy at least 12 containers of Friendly Farms Greek yogurt on every trip

The Friendly Farms nonfat plain Greek yogurt is an absolute staple in our home. We usually pay $3.35 per 32-ounce container.

Every morning, I have a huge bowl of yogurt topped with granola or fresh berries. I like to mix nonfat and whole-milk plain varieties, and my kids enjoy the vanilla and strawberry flavors.

We also add this yogurt to smoothies and homemade popsicles so they have more protein.

My oldest has loved Emporium Selection Parmesan cheese since he was 2 years old.

When my oldest was only a toddler, he became obsessed with the Emporium Selection Parmesan. He'd have 10 slices in one sitting, and he still loves it now.

We also grate the cheese over pasta dishes and roasted broccoli, which adds great flavor and a fancy touch.

A wedge of this Parmesan usually costs us under $5, which is cheaper than what we've seen at other grocery stores.

The kids are obsessed with Friendly Farms Moo Tubes.

Moo Tubes are squeezable packets of yogurt that are great to take on the road. We love packing these when we head to the beach or go on a neighborhood walk.

The cotton-candy flavor is a favorite in our house, but the kids also love blueberry and strawberry. Plus, Moo Tubes are tasty when frozen.

A box of eight tubes is usually only $2.

We always have Happy Farms string cheese in the fridge.

I keep Friendly Farms string cheese in the bottom drawer of our fridge so even little ones can grab a quick snack.

These are great to take on park outings or to add to kids' lunches. We go through at least a pack or two each week.

Fortunately, a bag of 12 string cheeses only costs us $3.

When we cook this salmon, everyone in the house is happy.

One night each week, we pan-cook Fremont Fish Market wild-caught pink salmon and top it with garlic salt and seasoned pepper.

All four of my kids gobble it up, and my husband and I love it, too. It's nice to have one meal that is a surefire hit with everyone — I know we won't need to make separate meals for adults and kids.

A 2-pound bag of this salmon only costs $10, making this a literal steal for our family.

Southern Grove pistachios make the best appetizer.

Pistachios provide protein and healthy fats, and the whole family loves the Southern Grove pistachios roasted with sea salt.

I often put these out before dinner as appetizers or use them to fill a charcuterie board when my husband and I host game nights. They're also easy to take on the go.

A 16-ounce bag is usually about $6 at Aldi.

We use Friendly Farms whole milk for everything.

We get a lot of use out of one gallon of Friendly Farms whole milk.

I make hot cocoa with it, add it to my morning coffee, and sometimes just serve up cups of it to my kids before bed.

Aldi tends to have the lowest prices for dairy, so we make sure to grab milk here every time. On this trip, a gallon only cost $2.57.

Savoritz cheddar turtles are my daughter's favorite snack.

Our kids like the Savoritz cheddar turtles better than Goldfish and just about any other cheese cracker.

At snack time, my daughter always asks for her "turtles." I can't blame her — they're cute and delicious.

A huge box of these crackers that's just over a pound usually costs us only $4.

This multigrain cereal goes quickly in our house.

My kids' favorite cereal is the Millville Balance multigrain cereal in the cinnamon flavor.

They eat this alongside a smoothie in the morning or as an afternoon snack. We buy other cereals, but my kids like this variety better than the rest.

I usually pop at least four boxes of it into my cart when I shop at Aldi. On my most recent trip, each 13-ounce box was only $2.15.

My husband and I love snacking on Southern Grove almonds.

The kids don't care for almonds much, but my husband and I munch on these while we work. I love the honey ones, and he likes the wasabi-soy flavor.

We'll snag a couple of 14-ounce bags (typically under $7 a pop) on each grocery trip to keep the pantry stocked.

Sweet potatoes are usually a great deal at Aldi.

A 3-pound bag of sweet potatoes is usually only $2.59 at Aldi. Since they're so cheap, I grab a bag on every shopping trip.

We bake sweet potatoes once a week and serve them with black beans. Sometimes, I slice them up for salads or sweet-potato fries.

We add Simply Nature chia seeds and milled flax seeds to homemade granola bars and smoothies.

I love to make homemade granola bars to save on grocery costs.

Flax and chia seeds are also key ingredients in my favorite energy ball recipe. I make a double batch at least once a week.

We also add chia and flax to our smoothies and baked oatmeal. At Aldi, bags of either seed are usually under $5.

My 4-year-old usually picks a French baguette as his treat for grocery shopping with me.

I usually tell the kids they can pick out one item as a treat when we shop at Aldi.

My son always picks the $1.69 Specialty Selected French baguette. I just pop it in the oven for a few minutes and then it's ready for slicing and slathering with butter.

It's an easy side for dinners that feels a bit elegant.

Click to keep reading Aldi diaries like this one.

• When my sons went to college, I became an empty nester.
• Since I was a single mother, I was left all alone in a silent house.
• I confronted the grief I buried after my parents died since I no longer had to care for my kids.

As I drove away from my son's college dorm last summer, tears rolled down my cheeks. I did not care about the mascara smeared on my eyelids.

A few minutes later, I called my son to check how he was doing. He giggled and said, "Mom, I'm OK."

As a single mother, I was not. I was missing his sweet voice. I held onto our last moments at home together and let all my emotions out. I cried like a baby.

My two sons were now out of the house and studying at the University of Tennessee. It was bittersweet to let them go. I was happy for their accomplishments and that they had a new road ahead of them, but I did not know what my road would be.

I was also now an empty nester — and I had to learn to be OK with that.

I struggled with the silence in my empty nest

I was afraid of silence in my house. I would walk through the rooms and realize my kids were gone. I grieved in the silence, turning the music on my phone so I did not feel alone.

Often, I found myself asleep on the sofa with the TV in the background.

I tried to fill my void with work and friends, but I still had to return home to that quiet, empty house.

Being a single empty nester mom is not for the weak. I had to focus on becoming the best version of myself — and allow moments of grief when they hit me.

The feeling of loneliness was familiar

As I sat with my loneliness and explored my identity crisis, I realized these feelings were not new. I felt them when my parents died and never fully processed those emotions.

I wanted to be strong for my kids and myself. I held my grief in for a long time so that I could care for my sons. But when they left for college, I realized I had stored the pain of my parents' loss. My kids were almost like a shield protecting me from that pain.

Once they left, I had to face the grief. When I was alone, grief came like a wave. I suddenly remembered my mom's words. She was the woman who taught me English.

Becoming an empty nester helped me own my feelings and rebuild my identity after losing my parents.

I've learned to enjoy the freedom of being me

To further work through my emotions, I decided to allow new experiences in my life. I traveled and connected with new and old friends. I started to write again. I focused on daily self-care — like evening walks, meditation, journaling, and working on my mindset.

I was removing the layers of my soul and digging deep to discover who I was and what I was hiding from everyone. I was returning to the original me. For the first time, I was deciding what was best for me — not just my children.

I learned that as you let go of your children, your happiness is up to you, and you can create anything. That is a part of grieving and healing.

I have gained the freedom to fly and explore new possibilities. I am still discovering what makes me happy, and I refuse to rush the process.

• I became a mom at 40, and my mom had me when she was 19.
• I've seen what it's like for young parents, and now, I'm an older parent.
• I'm glad I was settled and successful, but I had a magical childhood thanks to having young parents.

When my mom was my age, she was sending me off to graduate school. At 46, I'm sending my little one to pre-K.

My parents had me when my mom was 19 and my dad was 21 in early 1980s Latin America. They dropped out of college and needed a lot of childcare support from my grandparents. Though people were having kids back then younger than they are now, my mom was a rarity among her peers.

I had my child at 40 in 2020, and my pregnancy was officially classified as geriatric and high-risk. I was also a rarity: According to the CDC, just under 11% of live births in the US were to women 40 and above in 2021.

Being young was hard on my parents, but there were benefits, too

Though they were from pretty well-to-do families, times were tough. My young parents had fewer job opportunities without a college degree, a situation worsened by economic crises. In 1982, the Chilean stock market crashed, many banks were closed (including the one my dad worked at), and a recession drove rent to sky-high rates. We moved often, sometimes living with my grandparents.

They tried opening a cheese shop, but I remember when flash floods caused water to gush into our store, ruining everything. They couldn't catch a break. They shut down their business and immigrated to the United States with the help of my wonderful Irish-American grandfather, who had moved to Chile when he fell in love with my grandmother. My parents found their footing in America.

All of this happened during the first nine years of my life, and they shielded me from what was going on. My parents were full of energy and had a zest for life. It was a magical childhood, and we went on adventures every weekend: camping, hiking, barbeques, and visiting friends in the countryside. Later, in high school, I had a special bond with my parents because we were so close in age. I could tell them anything, and I never really had a difficult teen stage.

I'm glad I had my daughter when I did, but sometimes I wonder

In Hispanic families, there's an unspoken rule: don't get pregnant young. It's drilled into you from early on. I spent nearly seven years in school, earning a bachelor's, master's, and almost a Ph.D. I didn't meet the love of my life until later and married in my late 30s. By then, I was successful and settled in my startup marketing career. I was also living in San Francisco, one of the most expensive cities in the country.

Not long after we got married, we had to start IVF because my fertility test results showed we didn't have much time left to start having kids. Sadly, I lost my first pregnancy during my second trimester, but my daughter was born one year later without assisted reproductive tech. I was worried about trying to get pregnant at my age, and I do wish I would have met my husband sooner so that we could have had more time, but some things you have no control over.

She came one week before the pandemic hit. Like many couples during that time, we wanted to be near family, so we bought a home closer to my parents.

Thanks to my husband's career, I can stay home during my daughter's early years. Knowing that we can provide her with everything she needs and more makes me happy. Both my husband and I do drop-offs and pick-ups, and I can go to all of her Girl Scout outings and volunteer at her school. Lately, I have started to work on my freelance PR business and have been writing more, and it feels good to be able to work in a way that allows me to spend more time with my daughter.

Though I have the privilege of a flexible schedule, younger parents have the upper hand when it comes to the fun stuff. Playing with my daughter and her friends is hard on the body when you're over 40; your back aches, your knees hurt, and you feel tired much earlier.

I'm in what elder Latinas call my "señora era," which means I am slowing down physically and have to focus more on recharging, which younger parents don't really need. My fitness routine isn't about vanity anymore — my husband and I stay active and watch what we eat so we can stay healthy for our daughter and keep up with her as she grows without falling apart.

We camp twice a year and go to the beach and museums so that she is never bored. I know that some younger parents are more vibrant and fun, like my parents when I was growing up. When she's a teenager, we'll be the old parents. When she's the age I am now, I may be gone, and this makes me sad.

I've seen both sides, and I see the benefits and struggles both younger and older parents have. I can't tell which one is better, and maybe that's the point. There's no one way to do things. We make do with what life gives us. I just have great memories, and I hope my little one has them, too, one day.

• I have 12 kids, and I try to stick to a grocery budget each month for my family of 14.
• It doesn't matter how good a deal is if your family isn't going to eat what's on sale.
• The fewer trips to the store you make, the less money you'll probably end up spending on food.

I'm a mom of 12, and buying food for 14 people can get expensive.

If I'm not careful, my grocery bills can easily creep over $2,000 a month, which is way more than what I have budgeted. Thankfully, I've learned a few strategies over the years to help keep food costs low.

Here are my best tips for grocery shopping on a budget. 

Start by making a meal plan and breaking down what ingredients you'll need for it

Before I set foot in a grocery store, I plan what I'm going to cook in the coming days or weeks. This way, I know every ingredient I add to my cart has a purpose. 

When you know you'll use everything you buy, you save money and also prevent food waste. 

Figure out which list-making method works for you

There isn't one right way to make a shopping list — but if you find creating and keeping one to be annoying or inconvenient, you probably won't stick with it.

I've tried several styles of shopping lists over the years. What works best for me in this season of life is creating my list in Microsoft Excel, printing it out, and bringing the hard copy with me.

It's legible — unlike my scrawled handwriting — and I can cross off items as I add them to the cart.

Plus, no matter what order I add things in, I can quickly sort them by store and category in Excel. This makes the actual shopping part much easier, as I'm not aimlessly wandering around each part of the store or having to backtrack.

Bring a shopping list with you to the store

While making your list, go through your kitchen and check on the status of essential spices and pantry staples. It's easy to assume that you have something basic on hand, only to realize you're out once you start cooking.

After you create the list, it's also crucial that you remember to bring it with you to the store.

Too often, I make a shopping list but forget it and am stuck shopping from memory, which usually results in me forgetting ingredients and buying things I don't actually need. 

When I'm shopping, I put my kids in charge of the list

I almost always take some of my kids with me to the grocery store, and I use this to my advantage.

I turn my list and a pen over to my middle-grade kids at the start of the shopping trip. They can read off each item to help make the shopping trip go more quickly. 

Most of my kids take the job of list manager very seriously. If I add something to the cart that's not on my list, they ask me about it. This accountability helps me to decide whether it's something I need to buy or just an impulse purchase.

My kids will typically write the item in question on the list if I decide to buy it. This way, they can still cross it out — their favorite part.

Know the prices of basic things you buy a lot

On every shopping list, I include the estimated price of each item I buy so I can stay on top of my budget before I even enter the store. 

Having a general price point in mind also helps me spot bargains. If something is on sale, I can quickly compare it to see how much I'll save.

This also allows me to compare prices between stores if I suspect one has a better price. If the price changes drastically on an item I buy often, I take time to jot down the new number on my list while I'm in the store.

Then, I update the master list on my computer the next time I'm planning my shopping trip.

If you aren't going to use it, don't buy it — it doesn't matter how good the deal is

I like having food on hand so I know my family will still have things to eat if we can't make it to the store for a while. However, it's easy to take that preparation attitude to the extreme.

I used to stock up on almost everything that was on sale because I liked keeping the pantry full and thought this was a frugal way to do it.

This was a mistake. I ended up with lots of food in my cupboards that no one in my family actually liked or wanted. Many things sat around for years until they finally reached their expiration dates and had to be tossed.

Go to a couple of stores for the items on your list

When I go grocery shopping, I almost always visit the same three or four stores.

This allows me to take advantage of different products (and sales) at each without getting burned out from going to too many places. 

I typically hit Costco first because I buy bulk goods there, and they take up a lot of room in the van. I don't want to smash bags of food from another store by piling big boxes on top.

If you shop less often, you'll probably end up spending less money

I live in the middle of nowhere. The nearest grocery store is 15 miles away, and I have to drive almost an hour to get to a decent-sized town with more than one shopping option.

I can't just quickly run to the grocery store if I forget something, which makes all my planning and list-making even more important. 

Even if you live close to the store, you can use this tip to help save money on food. Each time you go into a store, you have the opportunity to spend more than you were planning. If you go less often, you can cut down on those purchases. 

I go on a big shopping trip once a month so I can take advantage of the better pricing in the larger city. Then each week, I make a quick trip to the local store to pick up staples like milk, eggs, and produce. 

Extra beverages can jack up your grocery bill if you aren't careful

Things like juice, soda, and sports drinks can really add up. 

To stick with our budget, I have my family drink water throughout the day, and that's often what I serve with meals. Occasionally we'll have iced tea or lemonade, but it's not the norm. 

You might have some complaints at first, but my kids eventually learned to drink (and even enjoy) water. 

Cut out the middle man whenever possible

I've found that purchasing some items directly from a farmer can save us a lot of money.

I used to raise my own livestock for meat, but when I stopped, I connected with another farmer. Since I have the freezer space and know it'll get used, I often buy a whole cow at a time, along with a whole hog and occasionally a sheep or two.

This is definitely a bigger upfront expense, but I get steak and roasts for the same price per pound as hamburgers, so it actually saves me money in the long run. 

Meat isn't the only thing you can purchase from a farmer. Do a little research and see who grows what around you. For instance, you can typically find decent prices on produce at local farms.

Just make sure you have a plan to preserve what you buy so it doesn't go to waste. Learn how to dehydrate, can, or freeze the extras so you can benefit from your savings all year long.

This story was originally published in September 2021 and most recently updated on April 7, 2025.

• Jennifer McGuire, a single mom, gifted herself with a 21-day solo road trip for her 50th birthday.
• She drove through New England to visit places from the books and movies that shaped her childhood.
• With four sons in their 20s, the trip felt like a gentle push to become her own person again.

To celebrate my 50th birthday, my four sons — now, all in their 20s — threw me a beach picnic party with friends, music, and a bonfire. It was the perfect party for who I am now.

A few months later, in early October last year, I set off on my first solo road trip. It was a birthday gift to me. Unlike the party, this road trip was for someone else — not for me as a mom, but for the different versions of my younger self along the way.

The first thing I packed was my portable fan. I've always loved a fan but began relying on it more desperately after I became a single mom. I sleep with it on, as the sound helps anchor my brain. The second was pillows. This was to bring along the comforting scent of home.

I had a car all to myself for three whole weeks, so there was space to make myself comfortable throughout the journey. More space than I had ever had in a car. More space than I had ever had in my own head.

Revisiting the past along the way

The plan for my 21-day trip was to drive from my hometown outside Toronto and head south across the border. I planned out stops across Vermont, Maine, and Massachusetts to places I had never seen in real life but, as the narrative settings for some of my favorite books and movies, had shaped me nonetheless.

They were, in a way, home to the girl I was before. Before kids, before marriage, before life made decisions for me.

"Little Women" was set in Concord, Massachusetts. It's a book I have read about 10 times. I credit it for making me want to be a good friend, a good writer, and even a good mother.

Martha's Vineyard, about 100 miles southeast of Concord, was, for me the land of "Jaws" — the first movie I saw in the theater at just 3 years old. A movie I return to again and again.

Maine was the setting for many of Stephen King's horror stories — including "It," "Carrie," "Salem's Lot," plus, my personal favorite, "Needful Things." The books I kept under my bed as a preteen, reading through sleepless nights when my body was shifting and growing, and I was becoming something entirely new. Another me.

Over the years, I have evolved into many different types of women.

And so, my goal for this trip was to visit each of them again. Most importantly, I wanted to revisit my pre-mom self.

I had my first son when I was 21, my fourth when I was 28, and I was on my own with all four by 30. I was never an adult without being a mom, never alone in a car for longer than an hour. I never stopped to pee unless at least two others also needed to pee. I didn't get off the highway to explore. My life had been focused on the logistics of parenting.

On my first morning drive, I let it in. The solitude, the choices I got to make for just me. I listened to the Spotify playlist from one of my sons titled "Good Country," songs by John Prine and Orville Peck, Dolly Parton, and Patsy Cline. Each of my boys curated their own playlist. They included songs from our life together and new music they knew I would like.

It felt like a gentle push to become my own person again.

Focusing on myself

Around day 10 of the trip, I settled into becoming me again. The sun was coming up, the fall leaves were at their brightest. I pulled off the highway and found a diner for breakfast. I took an entire hour to eat, drunk with the decadence of no schedule and a day full of my own time.

This was the rhythm I discovered on my road trip. I drove on my days off and stopped when I had to work. A run-down hotel in Cape Cod gave me a discount for a waterfront room in the offseason, and here I walked on the deserted beach, drank coffee in my room, and wrote. I liked the solidity of working from the road.

Sometimes, I stayed in an Airbnb, and sometimes, I splashed out a little on a fancy hotel room with nice towels. I liked lunch on the road and dinner sitting alongside interesting people at a bar.

I met a woman in Concord who bought me a martini and told me to go to Sleepy Hollow cemetery to visit all the "good graves." Two men in Maine became friends and invited me to their house for brunch.

I spent time with a local fisherman and his girlfriend in Martha's Vineyard. We ate potato skins, drank a beer, and talked about "Jaws" after a long day of my own personal location scouting. They told me that the bar was owned by a "Jaws" cast member, the boy who was eaten. I was introduced to extras from the movie, heard local lore, and a few good jokes

I slept so happily that night. Alone but not lonely, not hobbled by silence. I almost didn't need my fan.

Do you have a story about celebrating milestone birthdays? Contact this editor at [email protected].

The offers and details on this page may have updated or changed since the time of publication. See our article on Business Insider for current information.

• I'm a single mom who lives paycheck to paycheck and struggles with money anxiety.
• I'm always balancing the family budget in my head and figuring out ways to feed my kids dinner.
• I try to look on the bright side by reminding myself that my kids have a home and are healthy.

My son wanted Chipotle for dinner the other night, and I couldn't afford it.

I didn't want to say, "Sorry, but I don't have the money" — again. So, this time, I said something different: "If you want Chipotle, we have to work for it."

I explained to him that I'd have to make a few deliveries on the Uber Eats app to pay for our Chipotle. Thankfully, my 14-year-old was excited about the adventure and didn't realize this isn't how many moms feed their children.

But this is my norm because my paycheck as a freelancer and educator in Connecticut doesn't quite last to the next one — especially while paying increasing rent and raising three kids. It's becoming even more difficult now that the cost of living is rising.

It's so damn defeating.

I feel like I'm failing as a mother

At 46, I thought I would have made it by now — whatever that means. I thought I would have some financial cushion, a liveable salary, or a husband to ease the financial burden. I have none of that. I'm ashamed I have zero credit cards, savings, or retirement plans.

Instead, all I have is worry. My money anxiety is stealing precious moments from under my nose. My kids come home from school with stories and smiles, and I nod, but I'm not really there. I'm in my head, where the wheels are turning, trying to figure out which bills to pay this month and which to put off, hoping that my bank will reverse that overdraft charge and praying that my landlord will accept the late rent again.

I wake up every day and strive not to let money (or lack thereof) define me, but every day I fail. I battle with thoughts of inadequacy and guilt and shame because I can't provide for my kids in the ways I know they deserve.

We all deserve more. I need a root canal, and the tooth is starting to hurt, but my current health insurance won't cover it, so I am just trying to deal with it until I get new insurance, stumble upon an extra $600, or have the damn tooth pulled altogether. My daughter needs a prom dress; my son has grown three inches and needs an entirely new wardrobe. Anyone who has kids knows that each day brings with it new, unexpected expenses: field trip fees, coaches' gifts, and school projects that require things like a new white T-shirt, poster board, and markers.

Thankfully, the kids spend half the time with their father, who covers most of their expenses. But it leaves me feeling ashamed and guilty.

I envy other families who don't have to deal with money issues

As I stroll up and down the grocery aisles, I add the items in my cart to be sure their sum total isn't more than my bank balance. We've recently had to cut back significantly on groceries because of the rising prices.

I also look at the other moms and dads: Their overflowing carts, the smiles on their faces, and the Airpods in their ears tell me they probably aren't calculating anything. It makes me frustrated and sad that we have to live like this while they don't have these worries.

I try to convince myself that life isn't about material things, like dinners at nice restaurants, new comfortable shoes, or grocery carts overflowing with luxury items like ice cream and shrimp.

Still, there is happiness, and I hold onto that

Recently, I overheard my son say to his sister: "Moms are magical, aren't they?"

Moments like that make me believe I can do anything and get us through all of these difficulties.

I remind myself that we are blessed with a roof over our heads, food on the table, and health. These are the times when I know we are rich in important ways.

I also knew this on the Uber Eats deliveries with my son. To him, it was an adventure and an opportunity to earn something he desperately wanted. As it turns out, it was an opportunity for us to enjoy the things we do have that money truly can't buy: laughter, health, and love.

We were broke but happy for those three Uber Eats deliveries — and we laughed the whole time. It just so happens that Chipotle tastes even better when it's hard-earned.

Maybe my tomorrows are filled with a different story and the comfort of financial stability — or maybe my wealth comes in the form of health and love.

• In the 1980s, Cynthia Jones wanted to own a home, but her husband didn't. They later divorced.
• After the split, she spent $28,000 on her first home for herself and her young daughter to live in.
• Jones, now 68, has taught her daughter the value of investing in real estate as a single woman.

This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Cynthia Jones, a 64-year-old retired librarian in Toledo, Ohio, who purchased several homes without a cosigner or spouse. The interview has been edited for length and clarity.

When I was in my mid-20s, I discovered that my husband had no interest in becoming a homeowner. This, along with other factors, ultimately led to our divorce.

In 1982, as a single woman, I purchased my first property for my toddler and me. Since then, I've bought and sold four homes. Now, at 68, I live in my fifth — and final — home.

I love being a homeowner because whether I use my home equity to make improvements, invest in other ventures, or simply enjoy the stability of ownership, it's mine to do with as I please.

I've also passed this lesson on to my daughter, who happens to be single, too.

Before turning 30, my daughter also purchased her first property alone, without a spouse. Prior to that, she earned her graduate degree. Now, at 44, she's enjoying traveling and her career.

We're two women embracing single life, traveling, and making the most of our future.

I have always encouraged single women to build wealth through homeownership and real-estate investing. Owning property is one of the few investments that allows you to retain the asset while still making money. In contrast, with investments like stocks, you must sell to realize any profit.

Owning a home could also have developmental benefits. Some research has shown that children who live in a family-owned home may fare better in school, among other things. I have seen some of these benefits firsthand.

I didn't need a spouse to be a homeowner

Homeownership wasn't the sole reason my husband and I got a divorce, but it was, as I say, the straw that broke the camel's back.

In 1981, I was living in Toledo, Ohio, in a townhouse with two bedrooms and one bathroom that my ex-husband and I rented for around $500 a month.

At the time, I was considering setting up a private music studio to teach violin lessons from home, which required more space. The apartment was under about 1,000 square feet and felt cramped. Plus, when you share walls with neighbors, you hear them, and they hear you. There was also no laundry facility in the complex, so we had to go to a local laundromat.

With a young child and the possibility of expanding our family, I realized it was the right time to stop renting and start building equity in a place of our own.

While owning a home is a core value for me, my ex-husband never wanted the responsibility of homeownership. He believed it would be too costly. My counterpoint was that while there are expenses associated with owning a home, you can't build equity in an apartment, pay it off, or pass it down.

Buying my first home after the divorce was surprisingly easy. Fortunately, my former boss's wife, a real-estate agent, knew an elderly man who was looking to sell his condo. He offered seller financing, and the process went smoothly with no issues.

In 1982, I paid $28,000 for his two-bedroom, one-bathroom condo. The master bedroom and closet were spacious, and my daughter was thrilled to have her own room. I also enjoyed a nice balcony overlooking a pond, which was a peaceful place to relax.

We lived in the condo for eight years before selling it for around $35,000. Although it was just a starter home, I was thrilled to finally own something. And now, even after all these years, my daughter and I still talk about the memories we made there.

I taught my daughter the importance of homeownership

After my divorce, I remained single and returned to school to study fine arts and business. My focus was solely on my education and raising my daughter.

Over the years, I purchased four more homes, with each sale helping to finance the next. I bought my final home — a four-bedroom, two-bathroom house — for $187,000 in 2019. It's now valued at nearly $300,000, according to Realtor.com.

In the future, it will need a few repairs, so some of my equity will go toward that, and the rest will be saved, perhaps in a high-yield savings account for emergencies. That's the beauty of homeownership — while real estate goes through up-and-down periods, over time, you're generally building equity.

In 2013, my daughter purchased her own home in Toledo for $130,000 — a four-bedroom, two-and-a-half-bath house in the same neighborhood as mine. My 90-year-old mother and my nephew are currently leasing it. Last year, a house across the street from hers sold for $313,000, so I estimate her home is now valued at around $300,000.

My father passed last August, so we're transitioning my mother to my home, which has a first-floor bedroom and bathroom. Although my daughter's house has a chair lift, my mom is reaching a point where even that could become a challenge. It's safer for her to be here with us.

In this situation, owning a home is definitely a benefit compared to living in an apartment because we can adjust or renovate it to suit her needs. Some apartments have accessibility issues. While some complexes are required by law to make accommodations, this isn't always the case. Even if a landlord agrees, renters can be expected to pay for the upgrades.

My daughter plans to sell her house, and then we'll all be living together in my home. We are joining the ranks of others enjoying a multi-generational household.

Our neighborhood is fantastic. Everyone knows each other and looks out for one another. Plus, we're lucky to be right next to a park that offers plenty of nature. This will definitely be our forever home.

I want to encourage more single women to become homeowners

I've made many financial blunders in my life — but owning homes hasn't been one of them.

My only regret in my homeownership journey is that I sold my previous properties instead of keeping them as rentals. I'd be in an excellent financial position now and could have passed that portfolio on to my daughter.

It would have also helped with retirement. The rental income would have served as my primary source of retirement income, alongside other sources.

A friend of mine, who also bought her first home as a single mother, has paid it off and also owns a paid-off investment property. Now, in retirement, she's reaping the rewards of those smart investments.

Many years ago, I obtained my real-estate license, but due to various circumstances, I didn't pursue using it at the time.

As part of my "encore career" or second act, I plan to return to real estate — not just for income, but to educate women about the benefits of homeownership and investing in real property.

I've kept up with reading about the real-estate market, and I'm aware that single women are outpacing men in homeownership. I think it's because women like me are no longer waiting for marriage or a partner to invest in their own homes. I think, in many cases, they are thinking long-term about securing their retirement and building wealth.

More women understand the financial benefits of homeownership, and as I always say, you'll always need a place to live — so why not make it something you own?

• The allure of passive income hooked me, and I decided to start an online T-shirt business.
• The videos I'd watched online about the process grossly underestimated the time and work involved.
• Despite some initial success, the workload and stress outweighed the benefits, and I closed up shop.

In the summer of last year, a friend sent me a video she'd watched that explained how easy it was to set up an online business and make passive income. I was intrigued, and I soon went on a deep dive to find out more. I quickly came across several more videos and posts — all saying how easy it was to bring in a significant amount of extra cash by selling a designed product, such as journals, printable art, or T-shirts. I joined a few social media groups, reading through post after post, which all seemed to support the theory that this could be an easy way to make money. As a busy mom, I was intrigued. What I quickly learned is that passive income businesses actually involve a never-ending process that is anything but passive.

The passive income appeal hooked me

As a freelance writer, my income fluctuates a lot. I'm also a mom of four, and I'm forever running errands, doing chores, attending appointments, picking up or dropping off my kids, and helping at their schools. I also have a chronic autoimmune disease, which could make working a traditional job difficult. Having a full-time, 9-to-5 job simply isn't feasible for my life. Selling tees online seemed like the perfect side hustle.

I quickly learned how much work a passive income job is

Starting a new business, even one that boasts of being low-key, is incredibly time-consuming. I spent hours each day researching and working on my online T-shirt business. Some of the many tasks I took on included setting up a new bank account, figuring out taxes, designing the shirts (though I'll admit, this part was fun), researching SEO tips for product listings, ordering samples of the tees, and photographing products. I also had to determine product pricing that was both competitive and lucrative. I am not an accountant, photographer, or designer, so each new job I took on added hours upon hours of work to my already busy days.

Hiccups happened and left me scrambling

The passive income promo videos I watched drastically oversimplified how easy an online business can be. I spent day after day messaging with seller service representatives to work out issues with shipping, payment, design, and much more. I was stressed out almost all the time, desperate to do a great job and make my customers happy, while also trying to keep up with my family's needs and working as a freelance writer.

The business was moderately successful, but I couldn't maintain it

Before starting my online business, I already had a loyal and moderate social media following. The problem for me wasn't getting exposure and selling shirts. My struggle was all of the other tasks, such as products lost in the mail and constant website updates, that come with running an online business.

Several small issues became all-consuming. I sold some wonderful breast cancer awareness and racial equity tees that customers loved, with more designs in the works. Yet, there was nothing passive about getting the products made and sent to customers in a timely manner.

I had my online T-shirt business up and running for only about three months, bringing in a little under $1,000. Some may say I gave up too easily, especially since I had some success early on. But the videos I had watched promised that once everything was up and running, the business would be passive in both effort and income.

The truth is, the demands of selling tees online increased over time, and there was nothing hands-off about the experience. The business consumed my time and energy until I opted to close up shop. I'm both pleased and disappointed in my decision. I still have so many ideas for tees, but the lack of profit when compared to the workload simply doesn't make sense. My time is valuable, and this endeavor just wasn't worthwhile.

• Leila Green is a 41-year-old mom of 2-year-old triplets living in England.
• She had to learn how to feed and get three babies to sleep alone, which triggered anxiety.
• Mom guilt has been a constant battle she is now fighting back against.

This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Leila Green. It has been edited for length and clarity.

I remember a paralyzing shock running through me when I found out I would be having triplets. My husband and I went for a scan to check for a heartbeat, sitting in the same waiting room we previously sat in the two times we found out I had miscarried.

Lying down on the table to be scanned by the sonographer, I could tell something was up. I desperately tried not to freak out, recalling the bad news we'd had in my last two pregnancies.

The sonographer flipped the monitor for us to see. "We've got heartbeats," he said. "There are three of them."

I struggled with guilt

We planned that I'd have a C-section with 28 doctors and nurses in the room — a team for me and a team for each of the babies.

Although I knew in advance that the babies would be taken straight to the NICU, I didn't realize how traumatic it would be to be separated from my babies. We'd been a team — the three of them in me — for months, and then they were just taken away. It felt so wrong.

A few days after they were born, two of my babies had to be moved to a different hospital, while the one other baby and I stayed in the original hospital. That was the worst day of my life. I just didn't imagine this would be my start to motherhood.

Five weeks after they were born, I brought two babies home, leaving my one child who needed more support in the hospital. This is the point where mom guilt set in for the first time.

I could never be in more than one place at a time. If I was feeding the babies at home, I wasn't feeding the baby in the hospital. There was never enough mommy to go around. There didn't seem to be a winning option — I just felt I was always letting one of them down.

Finally, at nearly six weeks, all of my babies were home. My husband and I were new to parenting and didn't know what we were doing with one baby, let alone three.

We hired help

We set up a cot and a changing station downstairs and upstairs.

Feeds, a combination of breast milk and formula, happened every three hours. They all fed at the same time. I'd breastfeed one while the other two fed from a bottle in their bassinet. We used a muslin blanket to prop the bottle in place for the two in the bassinets, arranging that they could turn away when they didn't want anymore.

I had huge amounts of anxiety around feed times. Whenever someone wanted to visit, I tried to make sure they came during a feed so I wasn't doing it alone.

From a very early age, we had a strict bedtime routine and overnight schedule — something suggested by a maternity nurse we hired to help us for a week when we all arrived home. We were militant and inflexible because anything that would give us a minute more sleep was worth doing.

We tried to keep them all on the same schedule overnight, which meant when one woke up for a feeding, we fed them all. Otherwise, we'd be getting one back to sleep just as another woke.

Those moments in the middle of the night, when I was just exhausted and wanted to sleep — I felt like I was going to break. I remember times when one would roll over or whack each other in the face, waking everyone up — it was soul-destroying.

I needed 6 figures to cover the costs of day care

One of our best decisions was to hire a nanny to come in from 6 a.m. to 9 a.m. a few mornings a week. That way I knew, even if I had a terrible night, I could catch up on sleep if she was there.

Once the kids turned 1, I started looking at the possibility of returning to work. I had co-founded a company alongside my brother. I worked out that I would have to make at least £85,000 (around $109,400) just to break even on the nursery fees.

While I know a lot of women will do this for a number of reasons, I decided it wasn't something I was willing to do.

My career had been an integral part of my identity, so I had to go through stages of grief until I finally accepted it was over. It was a huge cost I paid in having triplets.

Because we live in the UK, we qualified for 15 hours of free childcare in September 2024 when the babies were 2.

I'm using the time for exercise and building a new brand, "F*** Mum Guilt," which will host events for moms about mom guilt.

It has been amazing to have the time and brain space to think about and build a brand from scratch — to have time to do something for me and other moms.

Now that they are toddlers, we're facing a new set of challenges.

The other day, the three of them worked out how to push a brother over the stair gate at their bedroom to go downstairs, pull a chair up to a top cupboard to get the cookies, and then bring them back to distribute to the two left behind. It's like they are ganging up on me.

The relentless illnesses have also been a challenge. Whatever one of them gets, they all get. Theoretically, they are enrolled in 15 hours of childcare, but they seem to rarely be there because they are always ill.

Most of the time, I'm just firefighting — sorting out everything that needs to get done. I naturally think about all the things I'm failing at, but when I have moments to reflect on the last two years, I consider that I have raised three babies at the same time. And now I'm raising three toddlers. That's pretty incredible.

• I'm a dietitian and mom of three who shops at Aldi a few times a month for my family.
• Some of our Aldi staples are Cosmic Crisp apples, sparkling water, and organic fruit strips.
• I usually save money by purchasing ground beef and frozen blueberries at Aldi.

An Aldi recently opened in our town.

The budget grocery store has been a good place to grab snacks, staples, and ingredients for cooking healthy and simple meals, which is important to me as a dietitian.

My three kids and I shop there at least two or three times a month.

Here are a few grocery staples we get at Aldi on just about every trip.

Bone broth is a shortcut to adding flavor to soups and sauces.

Bone broth is a staple in my cooking. However, making it from scratch is time-consuming and requires a lot of bones.

So, I buy premade cartons of it at Aldi. I love using Simply Nature organic bone broth to quickly and easily add more flavor and protein to our meals.

Specially Selected maple syrup is great on waffles and in oatmeal.

Every Saturday morning, I let the kids pick what we're having for breakfast, and it's always chocolate-chip waffles.

We love topping them with this tasty Specially Selected pure maple syrup, which also pairs well with oatmeal and other baked treats.

My kids love these Sundae Shoppe popsicles made with real fruit.

Aldi's Sundae Shoppe frozen fruit pops are made with real fruit and sugar.

My kids are obsessed with them for a summertime snack, and this version from Aldi is much less expensive than other name-brand options.

These frozen blueberries are cheaper and longer-lasting than fresh ones.

Fresh blueberries can go bad in our house quickly, so I don't buy them unless I have a plan to use them up on the same day.

However, we love using Season's Choice frozen blueberries for snacking or adding to yogurt and oatmeal.

I like organic whole milk as my 1-year-old's intro to dairy.

My youngest just turned 1, so we're transitioning her over to drinking whole milk.

Although we don't buy organic milk for everyone in the house, I feel more comfortable introducing my littles to dairy using a high-quality organic option like this one from Simply Nature.

Friendly Farms' creamy half-and-half is a must for my morning coffee.

I love half-and-half in my coffee (an essential for getting anything done with three kids), but many affordable store-brand options feel lackluster.

Fortunately, Aldi's half-and-half from Friendly Farms is creamy and rich, and I only need a little bit to make the perfect cup of coffee.

I use PurAqua Belle Vie plain sparkling water to make healthier "soda" drinks.

I love using plain, unflavored sparkling water as a blank canvas for making homemade "sodas" that aren't loaded with sugar.

My favorite combination is PurAqua Belle Vie sparkling water mixed with raspberry balsamic vinegar and lime juice.

Aldi often has great prices on ground lamb and grass-fed beef.

Grass-fed ground beef can have a healthier fat profile than conventional ground beef, and it's usually fairly affordable at Aldi.

I use it often for spaghetti, tacos, and hamburgers.

The ground lamb is usually decently priced, too, and I like using it to make kofta gyros.

Blocks of cheese are typically more affordable and versatile than shreds or slices.

I appreciate the versatility of cheese blocks.

We can cut off slices for snacks and sandwiches or easily shred it too — while avoiding anti-caking agents that are added to pre-shredded cheese.

Buying by the block is more affordable, too. Aldi's Friendly Farms cheddar is one of our go-to buys.

The kids and I love the Simply Nature organic fruit strips.

These fruit strips taste better than any fruit snack we've tried and are made only with organic fruit juices.

They're great for throwing in a lunchbox or taking on the road for a longer outing that may require snacks.

My 4-year-old says they're "the gummiest and the yummiest."

This bread is organic, nutritious, and cheap — a must-buy for our family.

It's hard to find bread that's affordable and made with fairly healthy ingredients, but the Simply Nature Seedtastic and Graintastic bread are my top picks.

I keep a loaf or two in the freezer for when I'm too busy to make bread from scratch. The thin slices are perfectly portioned for kids, and they pack a bit of fiber from seeds and whole grains, too.

Aldi's easy-peel, seedless Mandarin oranges are better than others we've tried.

Aldi's Mandies have been consistently small, sweet, and very easy to peel, while I've found that other brands can be hit or miss.

If I let her, my 4-year-old would eat 10 of these oranges a day.

If you think red apples are too mealy, you need to try this variety.

Until I tried Cosmic Crisp, I was a Granny Smith girl all the way.

However, these Cosmic Crisp apples live up to their name. They're sweet like a red apple but just as crisp and juicy as a Granny Smith.

My whole family loves them alone or sliced up with peanut butter.

I use frozen, pre-portioned ginger to add loads of flavor to stir-fries and noodle dishes.

Asian-inspired meals are some of my favorites, and many of our favorite recipes for them require ginger. However, I don't cook them frequently enough to justify keeping fresh ginger on hand.

Fortunately, the convenient pre-portioned frozen ginger cubes from Season's Choice last me a while and are much more flavorful than dried ginger.

Click to keep reading Aldi diaries like this one.

• I became a mother at 18, despite never planning to have children.
• But I still prioritized my children, teaching them about culture and allowing them to be curious.
• My parenting must have worked because they're becoming successful adults.

When I was younger, I never wanted children. Being responsible for another person felt overwhelming and exhausting. Honestly, becoming a parent was not for me, especially because I wasn't motherly.

But there I was, at 18, pregnant with my first child. Impatient and easily annoyed, I was about to become a mother. With a growing belly, I attended my senior prom and high school graduation, watching my classmates embrace their newfound freedom while I faced a completely different reality.

The moment I found out I was pregnant, I knew one thing for sure: If I was going to do this, I had to do it right. There was no room for half-assing motherhood. I had seen too many examples of what happened when people weren't intentional about raising kids, and I refused to let my child become a product of neglect or lack of guidance. Thankfully, it all worked out in the end.

I decided to embrace motherhood with determination

Parenting is a delicate balance. I had to not repeat the same mistakes my parents made while unintentionally making an entirely new set of mistakes. Still, my husband and I were determined to create a home prioritizing love, discipline, and honesty.

We approached parenting with a clear goal: We would lead by example.

I was young, but I wasn't clueless. If I wanted my (now two) children to take school seriously, they had to see me taking life seriously. So, I set the standard. I worked hard, remained curious, and showed them what perseverance looked like.

I tried expanding their minds beyond the classroom

Beyond academics, I wanted them to have a well-rounded perspective on life. I gave them an appreciation for older music and different genres. Most kids their age know nothing about "Hotel California" or The Rolling Stones, but my kids do. I taught them to listen to the actual words of a song — not just the beat. Music is storytelling, and I wanted them to appreciate the artistry behind it.

I also taught them how to think for themselves, to question everything, and to not blindly follow what everyone else was doing. We had deep conversations about the world, about decision-making, and about the importance of logic.

They saw all the movies I loved growing up, including my favorites, "Forrest Gump" and "Clueless."

I exposed them to all types of food so they could learn about different cultures and ways of cooking. I hoped they'd become curious about the world beyond their immediate environment.

My husband and I balanced each other out

To be honest, I was never a "fun mom." My neurodivergence made me avoid crowds, and when I did try to be fun, it usually didn't turn out well. I wasn't the mom signing up for every school event or planning extravagant parties. That wasn't and still isn't my thing.

My husband, on the other hand, was the field trip dad. He chaperoned school outings, ensuring the kids had fun experiences while I recharged at home. He was also the homework helper when I just needed time to breathe. We balanced each other out.

Raising kids has never been about perfection. We realized it's about being present, accountable, and honest. I never sugarcoated life for my children. I told them the truth, showed them the consequences of their actions, and reminded them that while they were loved unconditionally, expectations still had to be met. There were rules, but there was also space for laughter, real conversations, and the understanding that we were all growing together.

My kids are now excelling

I must have done something right. My 21-year-old daughter is currently in her junior year at one of Maryland's top universities, excelling in her studies as a pre-med public health major.

My younger daughter, now in 11th grade, scored an impressive score on her PSAT and even received a letter from Stanford University inviting her to a summer program.

Looking back, I realize that the version of me at 18 — the one who never wanted kids, who feared she wasn't "motherly" enough — had no idea what she was truly capable of.

Parenthood wasn't something that came naturally to me, but I showed up every day, committed to doing my best. And, if my kids' success is any measure of how I did, I'd say I didn't do too bad after all.

• Melissa Petro writes stories about her children, balancing the risks and benefits of public exposure.
• Despite past media scrutiny, she believes openness combats societal issues and personal struggles.
• She argues that storytelling's financial and emotional rewards outweigh potential privacy concerns.

Recently, when speaking on a panel about the responsibilities of caretaking and the work of building a creative career, I admitted what felt like a cardinal sin: I've written about my kids, and I'll probably keep doing it.

While the rest of the parent-writers on the panel solemnly shook their heads, I freely admitted that my kids are frequently talked about by name in my work. "My children don't get any more — or less — consideration than any other people in my life who might make their way into my writing. I weigh the risks, and if a story needs to be told, I tell it as responsibly as I can."

What I also do, which many people may not agree with, is post photos of my children on my social media and in my articles as a freelance writer. I see no harm in it.

At the beginning of my career, I decided to be entirely open about my life — including my life as a mother

I'm well aware of the pros and cons of oversharing online. 10 years before becoming a parent, I was the victim of mass media humiliation, an experience that might've made some people more private. Public shame and speculation had the opposite effect on me: I learned our secrets keep us sick, individually and as a society.

After the scandal and before motherhood, I wrote about nearly every aspect of my life — from my sex work past, mental health struggles and overcoming addiction, to professional achievements and how I deal with my success.

When parenting very young children through a pandemic bowled me over, I wrote about that, too. I've written extensively about what I've learned mothering a child with special needs, including the period I was compelled to homeschool.

Whereas some parents may feel skittish about sharing details that would expose them to scrutiny, I make it no secret that my now-seven-year-old son has a cellphone or that my children spend copious amounts of time on screens. My kids are the main characters in the latter chapters of my memoir, too, and my daughter is frequently highlighted in social media posts promoting that book, which I dedicated to her.

Parents are free to keep their private lives private — just don't shame parents who don't

While it's not unusual to hear parents say they never post photos of their children online, the conversation can get ugly when it concerns parents who share. It's common to hear that parents who post about their kids online are putting their children's privacy and personal data at risk.

I know parents who would never post their children's faces or any identifying information, like their kid's full name, gender, or date of birth, or disclose any information that might reveal their child's location, such as the name of their child's school.

That's their choice, and they're free to make it.

For me, the rewards outweigh the risks

I'm not a doctor or novelist — I'm a personal essayist. I've made a career from telling intimate stories about my life. My family's stories are my stories, and my stories pay my bills.

Some might argue that I could hold back on details, but my creative process is such that anything could become content, and details make a narrative come alive.

I respect when my editors request photos to illustrate my stories because images give a story context. In today's media landscape, all this additional labor is an expected aspect of publishing.

I can't afford to worry how a story about my toddler's toilet troubles might dissuade a recruiter from offering them a job in 20 years. I pitch these stories because editors buy them, and they buy them because readers are interested in real-life stories about everyday challenges.

When it comes to actual risks, I'm skeptical

The financial and professional benefits of sharing online are enormous. The idea that "oversharing" makes a child vulnerable to harm reminds me of when we all worried about razor blades in Halloween candy and panicked when we saw an unmarked white van.

Instances of stalking, bullying, and harassment as a result of information a stranger acquired solely on the internet are rare. When a crime occurs— when an image is altered or misused by a malicious actor — there's a tinge of victim-blaming (or mom-blaming).

More typically, our stories are twisted out of context, and a person's reputation is damaged by other people's misconceptions and ignorance. Take, for example, when another news outlet retold the story of my family's fight to obtain a free and appropriate education for my then-kindergartener and misinterpreted the essay's intent.

Essays that rile up trolls and result in tabloid ridicule are oftentimes the same pieces that earn a writer countless calls and emails from readers desperate for advice and thankful that we shared our story.

"You'll feel differently when your kids are older," other writers sometimes say — and maybe they're right. But I don't think so.

At ages 5 and 7, my kids are still too young to fully understand privacy and consent. For now, they enjoy that mommy's a writer and are delighted to be included in my public life.

They look for my book's cover every time we enter a bookstore, and they love seeing their photos online so much that they'll ask me to make videos or take pictures and have a hand in the editing process, such as choosing a filter or adding a song.

I might behave differently if that wasn't the case, but I'm unsure. I teach my children the one thing I know to be true: our stories matter, and we all have the right to share them. It's a lesson that seems to be sticking: my daughter tells me she wants to be a writer when she grows up.

• I'm a registered dietitian, and I shop for myself, my picky toddler, and my husband at Costco.
• I buy Veggies Made Great muffins and Kodiak Power Cakes flapjack and waffle mix for easy breakfasts.
• Kirkland Signature sliced peaches and Harvest Snaps are some of the best things I buy at Costco.

As a registered dietitian, I'm always on the hunt for healthier products and food options for my family that also taste delicious.

One of my favorite places to buy groceries for myself, my husband, and our picky 2-year-old is Costco, which I've shopped at for 13 years.

Here are some of my favorite things to get there.

My toddler and I both love the Veggies Made Great muffins.

Found in the frozen section, these Veggies Made Great muffins are so delicious you'd never know they contain vegetables.

My 2-year-old is in a persistent "no veggies" phase, so these often save the day. We both love the double-chocolate-chip muffins, which sneakily contain both zucchini and carrots — plus fiber-rich flaxseed meal and sorghum flour.

Oats Overnight high-protein oatmeal shakes are a hit in my house.

Oats are a great source of fiber, but my toddler only eats them in the form of a shake. So, I stock up on the tasty Oats Overnight high-protein oatmeal shakes at Costco.

They usually come in a variety pack with cookies-and-cream and chocolate-peanut-butter-banana flavors. Each shake contains a whopping 20 grams of protein and 6 grams of fiber.

I try to serve these to him about once a week. I love that they're easy to prepare and offer more protein than if I were to make overnight oats from scratch.

I always have at least a few premade meals from Kevin's Natural Foods in my cart.

As a busy working mom, premade entrées from Kevin's Natural Foods are a lifesaver.

Since they're already cooked through, all I need to do is sauté the protein for a few minutes before tossing it with the provided sauce.

My toddler likes Kevin's roasted-garlic chicken the most, but all the varieties we've tried so far are delicious.

Kodiak Power Cakes flapjack and waffle mix is great for making a protein-packed breakfast.

I love to offer pancakes for breakfast as something special, but regular ones often leave me feeling sluggish and hungry.

So, I use the Kodiak Power Cakes mix, which contains protein, to meal prep sheet-pan pancakes I can use for an easy protein-packed breakfast on busy weekday mornings.

That's It fruit bars are a go-to snack for my son.

I try to avoid offering fruit snacks to my son, as they often don't contain much nutrition. However, the That's It Fruit Bars are made with just fruit and no added sugar.

My son loves the taste of them, and I love that they're actually a pretty healthy snack we can get at Costco.

Kirkland Signature sliced peaches make serving fruit easy.

My toddler loves fruit, but buying it fresh can get really expensive.

I obviously want to support a diet filled with such nutritious foods, but the amount of fruit we plow through can often lead to sticker shock.

So, I like to incorporate more affordable options, like the Kirkland Signature sliced peaches. My son will gobble them up, and they're available all year, unlike fresh peaches.

Plus, as a busy mom, I like that they require minimal preparation — no need to slice or pit, just drain and eat.

Sun-Maid raisins are the ultimate shelf-stable snack.

My 2-year-old is a big fan of raisins. I'm hoping this love lasts long into his early childhood years before they become second to the more potent flavors found in candy and fruit snacks.

I stock up on the boxes of two 2-pound bags of Sun-Maid raisins at Costco because the price is far better than what I've found at my local grocery store.

Kirkland Signatures's organic fruit and vegetable pouches are the best.

In my experience, snack pouches are huge hits with picky eaters.

I love that these Kirkland Signature pouches are organic, contain fruits and vegetables, and have a short ingredient list.

Plus, they're shelf-stable. I always have a few in my purse and car for a last-ditch effort to avoid a tantrum.

My picky son really enjoys Harvest Snaps.

I try to offer my son fruits and veggies at each meal. Sometimes, Harvest Snaps' green-pea snacks are the closest my picky son will come to eating a vegetable.

Honestly, as a dietitian, I'm 100% fine with that since these contain fiber and plant-based protein, two nutrients many other salty snacks don't contain.

Aidells chicken and apple sausage is a quick, precooked source of protein.

I try to choose chicken sausage whenever a recipe calls for pork sausage, as it's often lower in saturated fat.

My favorite chicken sausage is from the brand Aidells, which I can find at Costco. We often serve the sausages as a source of protein alongside pasta and veggies for a quick, balanced meal.

I pick up a variety pack of Goodles, our favorite boxed mac and cheese.

The Goodles mac and cheeses remind me of other popular boxed mixes but with more protein and fiber.

I love giving these easy-to-prep noodles to my son for a quick dinner, and my husband and I enjoy them, too.

My whole family enjoys Just Bare lightly-breaded chicken bites.

Just Bare lightly-breaded chicken bites contain 16 grams of protein per serving and are a hit with my whole family.

We love quickly air-frying these as a source of protein for weekend lunches. To round out the meal, we usually add grapes and a few Harvest Snaps (see above).

Click to keep reading Costco diaries like this one.

• I was happy to take my son on our first big vacation together when he was 4.
• On our way home, we had two flights canceled, and at first, it felt like a nightmare.
• However, we were able to turn it around, and it became one of my favorite memories.

When my son was 4, I took him on our first big vacation. It was the first time we traveled out of state, and we had to take a plane to reach our destination. At the time, it was also a big deal for me to take an entire week off of work, but being able to take my son on a true vacation had long been a goal of mine.

We went to Vermont, where my family had a lakeside cabin, and spent the week hiking various trails, canoeing, visiting farmer's markets, and toasting s'mores while stargazing at night in the backyard. Being from Florida, the woods and mountain life were foreign to my son, and I was proud of finding a way to share an entirely new environment with him. Since we stayed with family and focused on free outdoor activities, my only cost for the whole trip was our airfare.

The cabin was pretty remote, which was great for really experiencing the wilderness, but it was a two-and-a-half-hour drive to the closest airport in New Hampshire. After our family dropped us off on our departure day and drove all the way back to the cabin, our late-evening flight was canceled. My initial reaction was fear.

When our late-night return flight was canceled, I was scared

While I was used to being a single mom, I was way out of my comfort zone, stranded in an airport with my young son. I spent hours in a ticket line with my mind going a mile a minute, worrying about everything from my son being up past his bedtime to how long we would be waiting for a new flight.

The airline offered us a different flight in the morning. It was unrealistic to ask our family to drive back and forth to the airport again, and I felt unsafe sleeping in the airport alone with a young child, so I pleaded for a hotel voucher. Then, after getting a shuttle to the hotel, sleeping there, eating the complimentary breakfast, and taking the shuttle back to the airport, our morning flight was also canceled.

After our flight was canceled a second time, I switched gears

This time, the airline told me they didn't have another flight until the next day, and I was able to negotiate a second hotel voucher. I looked down at my son feeling worse for him than I did myself. I decided to spend money I had no business spending on a rental car so we wouldn't have to rely on the shuttle.

I hopped on the New England freeway and found a Target, where I bought us some easy-to-prepare food and a Lego set to occupy my son that afternoon. We spent the rest of that day in the hotel room eating peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and apple sauce while I helped him assemble a Lego Batman and Joker battle scene.

After spending money on a car and various survival items at Target, I decided to continue making the best of our situation and took my son to the diner attached to the hotel. That one choice was when I finally had a real turning point.

At dinner, I had an unexpected transformative experience

While my hopes of the diner's quality had been supremely low, it was like walking onto a movie set, with a red and white checkered floor, red vinyl booths to match, model airplanes hanging from the ceiling, and one of those revolving cake displays filled with so many desserts that it seemed like a mirage. My son was elated, to say the least.

I let my son get whatever he wanted, including a milkshake with whipped cream and sprinkles. The server became friendly with us, bringing him a paper pilot hat, extra crayons, and paper for drawing. We became comfortable with one another and she shared that her son of the same age was at home with her mom for the night. I felt as though we could see ourselves reflected in one another, the massive amount of love we had for our sons, how much we wanted them to be happy, and the strain of time spent away from them to provide for them.

I left her a large tip and took my son to bed, comforted by knowing that I had kept us safe during a stressful event that challenged and scared me. Not only that, but by embracing the situation, I actually extended our vacation. Those 36 hours stuck in limbo turned out to be the best part of that vacation. I stayed awake that night feeling renewed and reflective. Even though I was working myself to the bone, it was worth it for now.

By the time we made it home, I felt stronger

I went home to Florida feeling more confident in my parenting ability and knowing that I would continue to find a way to make sure I could afford more of that — the privilege of being able to take some time from work to spend with my son, the emergency funds for unexpected events, and even the splurges for when they can really improve a situation.

What began as what felt like a high-stress nightmare that would never end became a valuable experience for me as a single mom, as well as one of the fondest memories I have with my son at that age.