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Yesterday β€” 21 December 2024Main stream

Luigi Mangione: How parents of alleged shooters cope, and therapist advice.

21 December 2024 at 01:31
Photo collage of Luigi Mangione and parental imagery

Jeff Swensen/Getty, Johner Images/Getty, Amaia Castells/Getty, Luke Chan/Getty, Lars Stenman/Getty, Tyler Le/BI

As a parent, you want to do your best. You focus on your child, ensuring they're emotionally safe, properly socialized, and academically challenged β€” anything to set them up for success.

It's hard to fathom a dark outcome: that your child would grow up to assassinate someone, or be accused of doing so.

That's what Luigi Mangione's parents experienced last week, as the 26-year-old accused killer of UnitedHealthcare CEO Brian Thompson was charged with murder as an act of terrorism. And the parents of 15-year-old Natalie Rupnow, who killed two and injured six others at a Wisconsin school before dying of a self-inflicted gunshot, according to police.

Working with parents who've watched their kids sink into dangerous behavior, family therapist Rachel Goldberg said it's very hard for them to heal. She said parents must strive to find self-compassion and "separate their identity from their child's actions," no matter how challenging.

Parents of shooters experience remorse and confusion

In her 2016 memoir, "A Mother's Reckoning," Sue Klebold, the mother of Columbine shooter Dylan Klebold, wrote about struggling to call her son a "monster" after he killed 13 people in 1999. "When I hear about terrorists in the news, I think, 'That's somebody's kid,'" she wrote in the book.

Peter Rodger, the father of Isla Vista killer Elliot Rodger, wrestled with similar confusion and guilt. He remembers sitting in horror, watching his son's retribution video, which he posted on YouTube before stabbing, shooting, and using a car to hit bystanders in 2014. "Elliot was far from evil," Rodger told ABC that year. "Something happened to him. He was the most beautiful, kind, sweetheart of a boy."

Such an event "forces us as parents to contend with our worst fears," Annie Wright, another family therapist, told Business Insider. "The lack of control, at some level, over who they become."

Mangione's family is wealthy and well-known in their community as the owners of a golf club and philanthropists. He attended the Gilman School, a prestigious private school in Baltimore, where he graduated as valedictorian and was described by his peers as "very social" and "very into sports."

Goldberg said that a parent's imagined worst-case scenario is usually that their child would become a lonely, unemployed adult living in their basement. If a child does the unthinkable, recovering as a parent can feel impossible.

Limits to a parent's control

Kids don't need to be out of the house to be mysteries to their parents. In the wake of the Wisconsin shooting, authorities are combing through Rupnow's online activity in search of a motive, finding a version of her life seemingly concealed from others, like her fascination with the Columbine shooters.

Once a child is over 18 and financially independent, parents' control over their lives becomes even more tenuous. In the Mangiones' case, their son stopped responding to messages for months before he was arrested.

For parents watching their adult kids slip into alarming behavior, their options are legally limited, Goldberg said. Often, their best defense is talking to their kid, but "it really depends how much their adult child is willing to let them in."

Wright said that involving third parties can help. Parents can try family therapy or find licensed professionals who can help manage their child's physical or emotional pain. Parents can also call their local authorities in extreme cases, such as when their child is in immediate danger or endangering someone else.

Goldberg said the best thing parents can do is know their child as well as possible and act when something feels off. "Don't wait until it gets really bad if you can possibly intervene earlier," she said.

Even then, sometimes, intervention falls short.

Rodgers, the Isla Vista shooter, was in therapy from the age of 9. Peter Lanza, the father of Sandy Hook shooter Adam Lanza, said his son had been assessed by mental health professionals multiple times.

Pain a parent can't fix

Loneliness and isolation can often be red flags when analyzing a child's behavior. Still, Mangione, who started a gaming club in college and was part of a fraternity, appeared surrounded by people.

This made it harder for him to disappear fully: In July 2024, when he cut off contact with his family, cousins and friends reached out on social media. In November, his mother filed a missing person's report in San Francisco, where Mangione has some relatives.

Despite his seemingly solid network of friends and family, Mangione had spondylolisthesis, a painful spinal condition. He frequented Reddit communities related to back pain, describing his symptoms as "absolutely brutal" and "life-halting." That can be isolating, Goldberg said.

"It is a very lonely place to be in pain all the time because you can't really be present with people," he added.

In 2022, when Mangione lived in a Hawaiian surf community, he experienced sciatica, debilitating nerve pain, in his leg. R.J. Martin, who owned the co-living space, told The New York Times that Mangione "knew that dating and being physically intimate with his back condition wasn't possible."

While parents can do a lot to relate to a child's pain, such as listening and doing their best to understand the nuances of what their child is going through, "empathy alone can't bridge every gap," Wright said.

Parents can still protect themselves

Goldberg's clients, particularly parents of kids with substance abuse issues, struggle to move past their guilt. Acceptance can take a lifetime.

"They live in fear of getting a phone call from the police or hospital; they question everything they have done," she said. "They often feel incredibly helpless and stuck."

Wright said the resulting grief from something like this can be "extraordinarily complex" and "often includes sorrow, not only for the victims and their families but for the loss of the child they thought they knew."

She suggested therapy and, for those with religious affiliations, seeking spiritual leaders they trust. Parents can feel so many conflicting emotions, and it's important to "allow these emotions to coexist without rushing to tidy them up," she said.

This is especially hard for the parents who felt they tried their best.

Upon learning of Mangione's arrest, his family released a statement contrary to the manifesto found with their son during his arrest. "We offer our prayers to the family of Brian Thompson, and we ask people to pray for all involved," they said. "We are devastated by this news."

Some parents try to find meaning in the tragedy. Klebold wrote her memoir and participated in press interviews. Chin Rodger, mother of Elliot, started speaking at threat assessment trainings. She hopes that people will get better at identifying the red flags of someone going through a mental crisis.

Still, some just wish it never happened. Adam Lanza's father blames himself for overlooking the warning signs. "You can't get any more evil," Lanza told the New Yorker in 2014. "How much do I beat up on myself about the fact that he's my son? A lot."

Read the original article on Business Insider

Before yesterdayMain stream

'Stealth firing' may save a company costs short term, but it can backfire in the long run

19 December 2024 at 03:32
Man walking away from work after being fired, holding box of belongings
Some companies opt for "steal firing" to reduce head count β€” sacking staff for minor offenses.Β 

YinYang/Getty Images

  • Companies use "stealth firing" to quietly reduce staff without public layoffs.
  • It involves dismissing employees for minor offenses to avoid public backlash.
  • This tactic can harm company culture, leading to low morale and potential legal issues.

Some companies are opting for a new tactic in slimming down employee numbers β€” "stealth firing."

Meta let go around two dozen staff in October for using their $25 meal credits to buy other items, including laundry detergent and acne pads, while EY fired many more for "cheating" and taking multiple training courses at once.

The Financial Times, which first reported the EY firings, referred to these instances of being dismissed for minor offenses as "stealth firing."

Joe Galvin, the chief research officer at the executive coaching platform Vistage, told Business Insider that this sneaky sacking is "a "covert behind-the-scenes activity" that "violates the principle of respect for the individual."

A corporation might think: "I'm trying to downsize a little bit without saying I'm downsizing a little bit," Galvin said.

"So you go through this process that does nothing but break trust."

Short-term gain for long-term problems

Stealth firing leads from an era of "quiet firing," where companies methodically made employees' roles increasingly uncomfortable and less appealing, such as implementing strict return-to-office mandates.

This trend, along with the quietly agreed-upon severance packages of "silent layoffs," is a tactic to avoid the optics of publicly cutting dozens of staff.

Cynthia Patterson, the founder of the HR consultancy firm PeopleOps.how, who has 20 years of experience in HR across tech, AI, healthcare, and retail industries, told BI that while quietly trimming headcounts in these ways may work in the short term, they can cause serious issues for a workplace.

"Any short-term outcome is offset by the negative cultural impact," Patterson said. "Employees are left second-guessing their own value and stability, creating an environment of anxiety and mistrust."

A lack of trust and stability can lead to low morale, reduced productivity, and a stressed-out workforce.

"This dynamic mirrors the patterns of toxic and/or abusive work cultures, where fear and uncertainty are used β€” intentionally or not β€” as tools for behavioral control," Patterson said.

A shift in power

People are also perceptive, and employees who see their colleagues be shown the door for minor indiscretions will only make them wary and dissatisfied.

Patterson told BI companies who push people out in arbitrary ways are mistakenly viewing avoidance as kindness.

"Employee performance management is part of running a business," she said. "And it can't be skipped because it feels uncomfortable or inconvenient to the employer."

Stealth firing, Patterson said, simply exposes a company's inability or unwillingness to have honest, necessary conversations about performance β€” and "signals to employees that the organization doesn't have integrity."

Galvin told BI that companies willfully harming their reputations in this way may find they are the ones suffering and bleeding talent ifΒ an era of revenge quittingΒ hits in 2025.

"The signs are pointing up toward a really strong 2025 β€” our community is energized, hiring's going back up again, investments are going up, expectations for profits and revenues are up," he said. "The power shifting."

Weigh up your options

It's always a smaller world than you think when it comes to work and looking for your next job, Ciara Harrington, the chief people officer of the leadership training platform Skillsoft, told BI.

"It's in the interest of everybody to keep good relationships," she said. "I don't think anybody really wants to leave a company on bad terms."

Sometimes, companies have to let their staff go, and the best thing for everyone is to do so with respect and honesty. That way, while the news isn't what the employees hope for, they still maintain a level of respect for the company.

The alternative is that employees post on public platforms such as LinkedIn, TikTok, Reddit, and job review sites about their negative experiences, such as how they felt undervalued and lied to.

Patterson said these stories could reach future employees, customers, investors, and even employment lawyers, opening up companies to potential legal disputes.

"Strong companies know their employees are human beings and deserve to be treated as such," Patterson said.

Galvin told BI that if there are signs that your company is looking to stealth fire you, it's time to start weighing your options.

Even if your employer isn't planning on firing you, if their communication is poor, and you feel unsafe, it's best to get out anyway.

"In the absence of a story, we create one," Galvin said. "If you sense that's happening to you, you either have the direct conversation with your manager or start looking for your next job."

Read the original article on Business Insider

I committed a white-collar crime while bipolar manic. Years later, I'm still facing the consequences.

14 December 2024 at 04:55
side by side of David Funes during a manic episode next to him happy and smiling
The author has bipolar disorder and experienced manic episodes.

Courtesy of David Funes

  • After being diagnosed with bipolar disorder in my 20s, I went through a series of manic episodes.
  • During one manic episode, I partied hard, bought a nightclub, and committed a white-collar crime.
  • The charges for my crimes hung over my head for years and still affect my life.

I was first diagnosed with bipolar disorder at 27 after I almost took my life during a major depressive episode. Instead, I ended up in a mental hospital for several days.

Seven years earlier, I'd had my first bipolar episode while studying theology. I went from being top of my class to almost failing because of the effects of depression on my mental capacity. A few months after getting out of the mental hospital, I was hit with a major manic episode.

I describe my mania as the rational part of my brain getting turned off and replaced with recklessness, impulsivity, and bad decision-making. This included partying every night at bars and clubs, womanizing, and developing a drug addiction.

In another manic episode, I committed a white-collar crime that changed my life.

I started making money illegally

In Jacksonville, Florida, I met some new party friends who were making way more money than I was.

They explained their healthcare fraud scheme to me, which involved paying illegal kickbacks to patients and doctors for prescriptions for compounded creams used to treat scars, pain, and migraines. We targeted an insurance company that would reimburse anywhere from $10,000 to $30,000. But the compounded creams were specially made by pharmacists and cost a fraction of that to produce.

In 2014, blinded by my mania, I joined the fraud. It was the easiest money I ever made. I partied much harder than I worked, setting up shop in strip clubs at lunchtime and ordering bottle service. I went on lavish party trips to Miami and Las Vegas.

In May 2015, the FBI raided our office and seized computers, paperwork, records, and prescriptions. I got a lawyer and found out I was potentially facing seven years in prison for conspiracy to commit healthcare fraud.

I didn't slow down and continued making poor decisions

I should have listened to my lawyer and slowed down, but after a brief depressive episode, another manic episode ensued. I did the exact opposite of what I was advised. I moved to Austin and bought into an after-hours nightclub.

I was partying harder than ever. I even moved my drug dealer into my spare bedroom to get a discount.

David Funes with sunglasses and hat on while partying
The author during one of his manic episodes.

Courtesy of David Funes

Things quickly fell apart, and I blew through hundreds of thousands of dollars β€” though I didn't fully comprehend how dire my financial situation was becoming.

Everything crashed around me like a house of cards: I ran my club into the ground, blew through all my money, and was evicted from my condo. I basically became homeless, living out of dirt-cheap hotels.

I found a new psychiatrist who helped me get back on track

I'd seen several psychiatrists over the years who prescribed medications, but I had trouble with the side effects. Thankfully, I was able to see a new psychiatrist who still treats me. He was finally able to put me on the right medications for my situation after years of trial and error.

My condition stabilized, and I was able to get a job in finance. I hadn't been charged in the fraud case, so it didn't come up on my background check. I was hoping the government had forgotten about it, but I was finally charged and pleaded guilty in 2019. I was on probation until I received my sentence.

I worked hard for years to get back everything I'd lost while having a potential prison sentence hanging over my head. After I was charged and pleaded guilty, I should have informed my employer. I regret it, but I was scared of being back on the street.

The consequences of my crime still follow me

In January 2023, my employer found out about my conviction and let me go. Having a felony on my record was extremely difficult, and I was turned down for dozens of jobs. I finally got a job as a delivery driver, making one-sixth of what I was making in finance. I had to start my life over a second time, and I moved back in with my family.

After 9 Β½ years, I was finally sentenced last week. The judge was merciful and took my mental illness into account β€” after five years of probation, I was sentenced to time served. It's still surreal to have my life back after a lost decade.

I've done my best to right my many wrongs. I'm living a different lifestyle and haven't touched drugs in years. I've decided my new purpose in life is to let my mess become my message and share my story in hopes of encouraging others who are struggling with mental illness. This year, I started a coaching practice where I'm doing just that, and have begun talking candidly about my struggles with bipolar disorder on social media.

And, for the first time since I lost it nearly 20 years ago, I've finally found my inner peace.

You can follow David Funes' story on social media @bipolarguylovinglife and mybipolarcomeback.com

Read the original article on Business Insider

Leaders who play favorites at work think it promotes excellence and healthy competition. It also breeds resentment.

14 December 2024 at 03:23
Playing favorites and gossiping at work, two men whispering in a meeting
Favoritism from leaders can be a slippery slope at work.

skynesher/Getty Images

  • Some leaders, including Airbnb's CEO, argue that favoritism can nurture excellence.
  • But it can also breed resentment and further detachment among employees.
  • Experts suggest balanced recognition to maintain motivation and prevent tensions.

Playing favorites at work is something some swear by, but it can be a risky strategy.

Airbnb's cofounder and CEO Brian Chesky, for example, told Fortune in November that he believed that nurturing high performers helps foster a culture of excellence.

"If you can't have favorites, if you can't say this is a high performer, and this is what excellence is, then you are going to be in big, big trouble," he said. "That's just not good leadership."

Chesky admitted that playing favorites "would be considered unfair and not systematic" at most companies and that doing so has to be done in the right way β€” free from bias and discrimination.

In fact, a bit of healthy competition can boost productivity and engagement among colleagues, but giving a select few people blatant and unfair preferential treatment will only fester resentment among teams in an already detached workforce.

Beth Hood, the founder and CEO of leadership and management training platform Verosa Leadership, told BI that favoritism in the workplace "is a slippery slope."

"While recognizing and nurturing high performers can drive excellence, if not handled carefully, it risks creating a culture of resentment and undermining team cohesion," she said.

"The challenge for leaders lies in striking a balance between celebrating outstanding contributions and maintaining the motivation and engagement of the wider team."

Nurturing high performers

Research from the Stevens Institute of Technology, the University of Illinois Chicago, and Hang Seng University of Hong Kong, published in the journal Personnel Psychology in 2022, found that one upside of workplace favoritism is that it can help clarify roles within teams and guide collaboration.

Hood said that for individuals who are highly motivated by positive reinforcement, "being openly acknowledged can act as a powerful catalyst for continued high performance. In this sense, leaders can use recognition as a tool to set a standard of excellence that inspires others to raise their game."

But favoritism can also get leaders into trouble.

Leena Rinne, the vice president of coaching at Skillsoft, a corporate training platform, told BI that favoritism is often "in the eye of the beholder."

"A leader can have really good intentions and still be perceived as playing favorites," she said.

"Recognition by a senior-level person does feel special," Rinne added. "So if that senior-level person is just even talking to or corresponding with or inviting people to different meetings, all of that can be perceived as unfair."

In a Harvard Business Review article published earlier this year, the authors pointed to the CEO of a Scandinavian robotics company who addressed just three of his nine direct reports in leadership meetings, and was seemingly unaware of the bias he was showing.

Pitting colleagues against each other β€” on purpose or not β€” can be hugely detrimental, Hood said.

"While in the short term this may seem like a powerful lever to pull, in the long term it is likely to cause significant performance challenges," she said.

Hood added: "It's a cynical leadership style that rarely ensures leaders can fully leverage everyone's potential, as it is predicated on a win/lose psychology."

Everyone appreciates recognition

Recognition is always appreciated, and it doesn't have to be big or costly.

Rinne said some of the most profound recognition she has heard people speak about years later is an email they received from their company's CEO.

"It takes almost no time on anyone's part, but really impacted how valued people felt, how seen they felt," she said.

If there are people in the organization shining brightly but not being recognized, you risk them feeling undervalued and ultimately leaving.

Rinne said praise works best when leaders communicate the link to performance, "ensuring that people feel that it's justified and fair."

Dilan Gomih, the founder and CEO of workplace performance and wellness consultancy Dilagence, told BI that words matter.

She said it's fine for leaders to favor people who are passionate about their work and do it tremendously well, but everyone has to be given the tools and opportunity to do so.

"It's got to be an equal playing field for anybody to be a favorite," she said.

Overall, Gomih said she struggled to see the benefit of having employees worry about being a favorite rather than about their work.

"Do you really want people wasting their mental energy thinking about favoritism? Or do you want their brains thinking about 'how do I perform my best at the job that I've been hired to do?'" Gomih said. "Because if they're doing that, it's win-win."

A better tactic may be to make that competition external and say, "It's us against the world," she said, to boost camaraderie and teamwork.

Rinne also said that the idea of "healthy competition" in companies could be reframed.

"It's always the team competition, the collaborative competition, that gets the organization the results we want," she said. "In my career, I haven't seen pitting team members against each other work in any context β€” except maybe the offsite scavenger hunt."

Airbnb declined a request to comment.

Read the original article on Business Insider

Federal judge who refuses mental evaluation at age 97 fights suspension

11 December 2024 at 05:20

Judge Pauline Newman, the oldestΒ federal judge in America at age 97, is continuing to fight against a suspension from the bench by her colleagues who found her mentally not fit enough to serve. Newman is appealing her suspension and has also filed a motion to unseal documents related to an investigation which ultimately led to her being temporarily removed from the bench.

Newman, who was appointed byΒ President Ronald ReaganΒ in 1985 to the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Federal Circuit, was barred from serving in September 2023 for a year by the Federal Circuit's Judicial Council after the panel said she refused to cooperate with an investigation into "reasonable concerns" surrounding her mental fitness. The suspension was extended for another year by the panel in September.Β 

The Committee on Judicial Conduct conducted more than 20 interviews with court staff pointing to her "significant mental deterioration including memory loss, confusion, lack of comprehension, paranoia, anger, hostility and severe agitation," per court documents.Β 

FEDERAL JUDGE, 96, BARRED FROM HEARING CASES AFTER PANEL CLAIMS LACK OF MENTAL FITNESS: 'BASELESS ALLEGATIONS'

The suspension order also said Newman was slower than her colleagues in issuing opinions and had "amassed a troubling backlog of cases," which her team has said is not accurate.

The Federal Circuit Court on which Newman has served for nearly 40 years deals frequently with patent, intellectual property and copyright cases. Newman is considered a leading intellectual property jurist.

The investigation into Newman led her to file a federal lawsuit against her fellow judges.

U.S. District Judge Christopher R. Cooper, a President Obama appointee,Β threw out most of Newman’s lawsuitΒ in February, then dismissed the entire case on the pleadings in July, per Law & Crime.

In his 15-pageΒ ruling, Cooper rejected the legal challenges Newman had raised to the Judicial Conduct & Disability Act and did not focus on the factual allegations against Newman.

Newman appealed the ruling Monday and argued via counsel to the U.S. Court of Appeals for the District of Columbia Circuit that although advanced in age, she "retains her sharp intellect," and both lay and expert witnesses have described her as an "unusually cognitively intact … woman" whose cognitive and physical abilities make her appear "20 or more years younger than her stated age," per Law & Crime.

She says she is physically and mentally fit enough to continue doing her job, and has obtained independent evaluations from doctors issuing the same opinion, court documents revealed.

REAGAN-APPOINTED JUDGE, NOW 95, FACES PROBE INTO WHETHER SHE CAN STILL DO THE JOB

In the appellate brief, cited by Law & Crime, Newman’s counsel said she was in sound mental and physical health, and argued that the only reason Newman was late in submitting written opinions is that "she takes extraordinary pains to ensure that her opinions fully reflect her views and remain consistent from case to case and year to year."

Newman is being represented in the lawsuit by the New Civil Liberties Alliance (NCLA), a nonprofit civil rights group that says it views the "administrative state" as an especially serious threat to constitutional freedoms.

The group says that the suspension is illegal and that Newman was removed without due process.Β 

"Judge Newman’s indefinite, complete suspension is unprecedented in American judicial history, exceeding sanctions imposed on judges who committed serious misconduct and improprieties," the group said in a statement. "Suspending an Article III judge from all judicial functions of her office is unconstitutional."

The group said that world-renowned neurosurgeon Dr. Aaron G. Filler recently directed a cutting-edge Perfusion Computed Tomography (PCT) scan of Newman’s brain and administered a full neurological examination that turned up "no relevant deficits,Β confirmingΒ that she isΒ fully fit to perform the duties of the office."

On Thursday, Greg Dolin, who has represented Newman throughout the case, said via a statement that the entire disciplinary process against Judge Newman was "always factually baseless and legally meritless."

"But the issues are more important than Judge Newman," said Dolin, a senior litigation counsel for the NCLA. "At stake is the very independence of American judiciary and our system of checks and balances. The D.C. Circuit should put a stop to the Federal Circuit Judicial Council’s unconstitutional andΒ ultra viresΒ actions against Judge Newman."

Newman also filed a motion to unseal documents related to the committee’s investigation and findings that are subject to a Dec. 4 gag order, per Law & Crime.

Newman’s legal team said that Newman’s judicial colleagues have refused to abide by rules of judicial conduct and have "threatened Judge Newman and her counsel with unspecified sanctions" for making documents public.

Her team also accused the defendants of seeking to "direct the process within their own forum" in an "entirely inappropriate effort" to contradict the law.

Former senior U.S. District Judge Wesley Brown, was the oldest person to serve as a federal judge in the history of the United States, actively hearing cases until approximately one month before his death at age 104, according to the U.S. Courts.Β 

Fox News’ Brianna Herlihy andΒ Elizabeth Pritchet contributed to this report.Β 

Rocket Lab's CEO says being paranoid at work is his superpower — but it can come at a huge cost

11 December 2024 at 02:15
Rocket Lab's CEO Peter Beck
Rocket Lab's CEO Peter Beck.

Phil Walter/Getty Images

  • Rocket Lab CEO Peter Beck views paranoia as a leadership superpower.
  • Experts warn Beck's mindset may lead to burnout and a toxic work environment.
  • Effective leadership requires resilience and fostering a culture of trust, workplace pros say.

Peter Beck doesn't sleep soundly and thinks paranoia is a "superpower."

The founder and CEO of the aerospace company Rocket Lab told CNBC in an interview that going home and sleeping soundly every night "just doesn't seem a tangible possibility."

He also described himself as a "chronic workaholic" and a "micromanager," and said he was "paranoid about everything, especially failure."

While some other leaders share Beck's views, workplace pros think it might be a recipe for burnout and stress.

Heather Lamb, a workplace well-being expert and author of "How Not to Be a People Pleaser," told Business Insider that while constantly being on your toes may feel like a way to stay sharp, this mentality "breeds a toxic work environment."

"Instead, constant stress and fear of falling short can inspire anxiety, self-doubt, and burnout that is damaging to productivity and well-being alike," she said.

A recipe for success?

Beck became the "newest space billionaire" in November, according to Forbes, with his 10% stake in Rocket Lab worth $970 million, and having accrued $65 million from selling shares.

The company is currently valued at $11.2 billion, according to CNBC.

Still, he is lagging behind other space entrepreneurs, including Elon Musk (worth $354 billion) with SpaceX and Jeff Bezos (worth $240 billion) with Blue Origin.

Rocket Lab's stock price surged to an all-time high at the end of November. While the company rivals Musk's SpaceX, Beck previously told BI he has no intention of colonizing Mars.

Instead, Rocket Lab focuses on building and managing rockets and satellites.

"Rocket Lab will never have the capital that Jeff and Elon have," Beck told Bloomberg News in an interview. "But all that means is you have to be a bit better at hustling, a little bit better at being innovative. You can't break the laws of physics no matter how much capital you've got."

Caution vs fear

Beck believes that his paranoia and micromanaging have helped his career.

In the short term, paranoia and a hyper-vigilant mindset can drive exceptional results, Edel Holliday-Quinn, a business psychologist who has worked in senior roles at Citi and PwC, told BI, especially in high-stakes industries like aerospace.

Breese Annable, a licensed clinical psychologist and career coach who has worked with many high-achieving professionals, also told BI that some level of alertness can be valuable for leaders.

"Anticipating challenges and planning for contingencies are facets of strategic thinking," she said. "However, when vigilance crosses into chronic hypervigilance, the psychological and relational costs outweigh the benefits."

Lamb told BI that leaders who are always anxious about the next misstep may lose sight of their own well-being.

"The world thrives on fear β€” yeah, people take pride in their work, for sure," she said. "Wanting to do good work is a fine goal. But if paranoia is at the heart of it, you are working to inhibit yourself rather than improve."

There's a difference between exercising caution and being immobilized with fear of failure, Lamb added.

"Realistic caution is the practice of thinking about the future, having contingency plans, and being mindful of all of the hurdles we face," she said. "But it's about managing those worries in a way that won't overwhelm you."

Negative impacts are individual and workplace-wide

Sleep deprivation significantly affects cognitive functioning, decision-making, and emotional regulation, Annable said, and if it is experienced long-term, it has been linked to higher risks of cardiovascular disease and weakened immune function.

Chronic stress can also have physiological effects by contributing to chronic illnesses like high blood pressure.

And it's not just the individual who is affected.

Worrying too much about the future can have a lasting impact on the workforce as well.

Leaders who are on edge and driven by failure are likely to be micromanagers, Holliday-Quinn said, which can create a toxic workplace culture.

"Research consistently shows that employees under micromanagers experience lower job satisfaction, decreased engagement, and higher turnover rates," Annable said. "This creates a ripple effect that can undermine long-term organizational success."

Over time, this can lead to high turnover and low employee happiness.

"Employees may feel disempowered, undervalued, and overly scrutinized," she said. "Which stifles creativity and collaboration."

True effective leadership, Holliday-Quinn said, requires "resilience, self-awareness, and the ability to foster a culture of trust, collaboration, and empowerment."

"These are the hallmarks of leaders who leave a lasting legacy," she said. "Not just in terms of success but in terms of the positive impact they have on their organizations and the people within them."

Beck didn't respond to a request for comment from BI.

Read the original article on Business Insider

2025 could be the year of 'revenge quitting' — here's how bosses should prepare

5 December 2024 at 06:28
A man throwing papers up in the air, quitting job
2025 could see resentment boiling over and a wave of companies losing their talent.

Viorika/Getty Images

  • It's looking like job market conditions will improve in 2025.
  • Employees who are feeling burned out and dissatisfied may decide to "revenge quit."
  • Bosses can prepare by focusing on empathy and meaningful communication.

With a job market heating up and employee resentment boiling over, "revenge quitting" looks to be on the horizon for 2025.

Edel Holliday-Quinn, a business psychologist, told Business Insider that some workers feel burned out and undervalued in part due to increased workloads and a back-and-forth about hybrid working.

In 2025, she said, many people are therefore thinking: "New year, new job."

"The job market is starting to loosen up, and for those who have been simmering with frustration, this might be the year they finally quitβ€”not just quietly, but loudly," Holliday-Quinn said.

"Revenge quitting," she said, is where employees leave not just to move on "but to make a point."

Burnout and toxicity

Employment analysts previously told BI that the Great Detachment is plaguing workplaces and is one of the biggest challenges leaders face.

Partner that with the fact it might be easier to switch jobs next year, and employers could soon realize their best talent is jumping ship.

"If we as HR leaders don't act now, we do run the risk that a lot of those employees will just decide the opportunities are not there for them in the current company," Ciara Harrington, the Chief People Officer of the corporate training platform Skillsoft, told BI.

"Once the market opens up and they start getting the calls again, you could see an increase in your attrition," she said. "If any other employer wants this person, they're probably somebody you want to retain as well."

According to workplace experts, employees across all industries are increasingly engaging in "productivity theater" and performative busyness to get through their workday, and the workforce as a whole is disengaged.

They're struggling in other ways, too.Β For the ninth year in a row,Β the employee benefits platform Businessolver surveyed 20,000 employees, HR professionals, and CEOs across six industries on the state of workplace empathy. The report found that 42% of all respondents and 52% of CEOs reported working in a toxic environment.

In 2023, people were "rage applying" for jobs, angrily scrolling through job ads when they were fed up. Revenge quitting is similar, with the added vengeance of moving on to something better.

Stretched too thin

Beth Hood, the founder and CEO of the leadership and management training platform Verosa, told BI that employee dissatisfaction "rarely stems from a single event."

"It's often a gradual erosion of 'intrinsic motivators' such as connection, meaning, and safety," Hood said. "When these motivators are left unmet, resentment and detachment can grow, eventually leading to employees walking away, often in frustration or as a way of reclaiming control."

Holliday-Quinn, who has worked in senior roles at Citi and PwC, said employees have reported being stretched thin, due to cuts and heavier workloads, made worse by the attack on middle managers.

"Dissatisfaction has been quietly brewing," Holliday-Quinn said, with a period of layoffs and RTO mandates.

"This disconnect between leadership and the workforce isn't just a communication issue," she said. "It's a retention crisis waiting to happen."

Generational dynamics are also at play, with Gen Zers being skeptical about climbing the corporate ladder for little payoff. Younger workers are "less willing to tolerate outdated workplace cultures or rigid hierarchies," said Holliday-Quinn.

"Companies that don't adapt to these expectations will struggle to retain the next wave of talent," she said.

How to prepare

Harrington told BI that company leaders need to be trained to have crucial conversations with their direct reports because "most team members leave a manager, not a company."

The Businessolver report found that while 55% of CEOs believe they lead with empathy at work, only 28% of employees actually agreed.

Harrington said listening goes a long way, as does filtering down information from above effectively.

"I'm a really big believer in investing in leaders really is investing in the company as a whole," she said. "Because if they're doing their job, they're going to be working on the individual team member engagement, retention, and motivation."

Harrington said if an employee has been treated with empathy and felt heard in their current role, they're more likely to help with the transition or stay longer to meet deadlines during their notice period rather than being checked out and unhelpful.

"You're much more likely to get that really helpful and good transition," Harrington said. "Which will help massively with business continuity.

For others, though, "revenge quitting" could impact them greatly.

"2025 is shaping up to be a wake-up call for employers," Holliday-Quinn said. "Those who have relied on control over connection or ignored the mounting dissatisfaction within their teams are about to face the consequences."

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I've been playing golf my whole life. The game taught me tools I still use to regulate my emotions as an adult.

2 December 2024 at 08:19
Woman swinging gold club in sand pit
I (not pictured) have spent years playing golf, and the frustrating sport taught me some skills that help me regulate my emotions as an adult.

Charles Briscoe-Knight/Getty Images

  • I learned to play golf as a young girl and was often frustrated with the game.
  • Dealing with a lot of ups and downs on the golf course has taught me to regulate my emotions.
  • Thanks partly to golf, I am confident in my ability to stay calm as an adult.

I still remember one of the first times I lost it on the golf course.

I was around 10 years old, using the set of kid's clubs I'd gotten for Christmas. First, my ball squirted off into the woods. My next swing missed the ball entirely, and the one after that sent it into a tree trunk and back at my feet.

I can still feel the way the frustration surged through me, an emotion I didn't yet know how to deal with. "I hate golf, I want to go home!" I whined, throwing my club on the ground before a full-on meltdown ensued.

That wasn't the first time I'd flipped out on the golf course, nor the last. Although I continued playing as I grew up, I struggled to manage the waves of emotion that came with the sport. When my round was going well, I was on top of the world β€” but when the ball wasn't going where I wanted it to, I was exasperated.

In time, though, I learned how to regulate my emotions while playing β€” a valuable skill that eventually carried over to other aspects of my life.

Golf can be a frustrating sport, but I started to work on managing my emotions as I played

Golf ball next to hole
Playing golf isn't always a calming experience for me.

irwan rosidi / 500px/Getty Images

When you're swinging a club in an arc around your body to hit a tiny golf ball toward a hole with a 4.25-inch diameter, there's no room for error.

It can feel like much of your performance is out of your hands, and that lack of control can be stressful.

But swing by swing, I learned how to regulate my emotions even when the game wasn't going as I'd hoped. When a bad shot set off a fire in my belly, I would take a deep breath and let it go. I had no choice β€” I couldn't indulge my moods in the middle of a round, especially in a competitive setting.

As a tween, I began to recognize patterns, noting how my mind would jump to the worst-case scenario for my score as soon as I messed up one shot.

Identifying those patterns was the first step toward changing them. Now, it takes more than just a bad shot or two to rattle me.

That ability to regulate my emotions has helped me off the course, too

When I dealt with a terrible illness at 14, I relied on the emotion-regulating tools I'd learned on the golf course to steady myself even when in pain.

As I experienced dramatic mood swings in high school, I knew to ground myself in the knowledge that these emotions were fleeting.

Just as a dark cloud of emotion would evaporate on the golf course as soon as I hit a good shot or parred a hole, the same would happen in these everyday situations.

Now as an adult in my mid-20s, I give golf a lot of the credit for getting me where I am β€” and the valuable skills I've developed so far are just one of many reasons I keep stepping back onto the course.

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Budgeting isn't for everyone, but 'intuitive spending' has its problems too

2 December 2024 at 08:01
A woman going through her finances and making a budget
Finance pros often recommend budgeting, but some think it could use a "rebrand."

skynesher/Getty Images

  • A financial guru has criticized strict budgets, advocating for intuitive spending instead.
  • Budget culture is seen as restrictive, leading to potential "budget burnout."
  • Experts suggest balancing intuitive spending with realistic budgeting for financial health.

Saving money and paying off debts can feel like an endless cycle, which is why financial gurus are so keen on budgeting.

But Dana Miranda, a certified personal finance educator, told CNBC Make It in a recent interview that strict spending plans can be "toxic."

Miranda, who is also the author of "You Don't Need a Budget," told the outlet that budget culture is based on "restriction, shame, and greed," and there's little concrete evidence it works in the long term.

Instead, she recommended "intuitive spending" and thinking about your money "moment by moment." Rather than punishing themselves for overspending, people should reward themselves when they save, Miranda said.

Not all financial pros are in agreement, though.

Katrin Kaurov, the CEO and cofounder of the social financial platform Frich, told Business Insider it's true that "everyone hates budgeting."

But she isn't convinced intuitive spending is a good alternative. For some, it can increase debt and result in purchases they don't need.

To budget or not to budget

Doug Carey, a chartered financial analyst and founder of the retirement and financial planning software WealthTrace, told BI that whether to budget is a question that comes up with many of his clients.

Generally, he said he disagrees that people must have a set budget and stick to it. As long as someone can max out their 401(k) contributions and save enough for emergencies, "they can use their intuition for spending."

For these people, it is pretty obvious when they are spending too much, Carey said, because they'll dip into savings.

Budgets can be too limiting for people who are more flexible in their income, such as freelancers or contractors, for example, because these systems don't often allow for easy changes.

Carey said the "micromanagement" of daily things can also "obscure the bigger picture of your financial health," such as long-term financial goals such as retirement savings or building wealth.

"This can create a negative association with managing money and lead to 'budget burnout,'" Carey said. "Many give up on budgeting when they feel like they cannot live within the strict limits of the budget."

Trial and error

Budgets can be more universally helpful if they make room for flexibility.

Kaurov told BI that budgeting isn't inherently toxic, "but many people create budgets with too much enthusiasm and optimism for how little money they will spend from month to month."

People spend more during the holidays, for example. So using December's budget in January probably won't work.

Kaurov said a budget should be about creating a realistic guideline for spending and saving. If you've set one you can't follow, you should rethink it, she said.

"Budgeting is a tricky β€” but important β€” skill for people to learn when they're starting to manage their money," she said. "Trial and error is crucial and will allow people to find what kind of budget works best for them."

The grass isn't always greener

Intuitive spending sounds like a good idea, but it may be a case of "the grass is always greener," Kaurov added.

"For so many, especially younger people who are often on a tighter budget anyway, it's a really poor financial habit to develop," she said.

For those who are partial to impulsively buying trendy items from social media ads, "intuitive spending" can quickly turn into overspending on things you don't need.

Julie Guntrip, the head of financial wellness at Jenius Bank, told BI that rather than following absolute rules about their spending, people give themselves grace when things don't go to plan.

"Budgeting practices many times fail because people can't stick to them β€” an individual makes one misstep and decides to give it all up," she said.

A better course of action may be somewhere in the middle.

"Factoring splurges into a budget could be a great compromise for someone who may feel like budgeting is too constraining," Guntrip added. "This practice may actually help someone stick with a budget longer."

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As a personal trainer in my 20s, I ate as little as possible and over-exercised to stay lean. At 34, I'm fitter, healthier, and stronger — but much less strict.

30 November 2024 at 03:53
Sohee Carpenter sitting on a block.
Sohee Carpenter is a personal trainer based in California.

Bradley Wentzel

  • Personal trainer Sohee Carpenter hasn't always had a healthy relationship with food and exercise.
  • She was fixated on being lean at the expense of her health, but has now rejected diet culture.
  • Carpenter is a believer of body neutrality, and emphasizes self-improvement and holistic health.

This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Sohee Carpenter, a 34-year-old strength and conditioning coach with a BA in human biology and an MA in psychology, based in Orange County. The following has been edited for length and clarity.

When I first got into exercise as a teenager, it was all about cardio. I did as much cardio and ate as little as possible.

Then in 2008, I started lifting weights alongside the cardio and I learned about protein and macronutrients. I was eating more, but I still wasn't healthy because my approach was so rigid. I was a compulsive exerciser.

For so many years, my focus was being as lean as possible.

But now I know that health-promoting behaviors can be pursued independent of body changes, weight, and body composition.

My focus was on being small

Sohee Carpenter crouching down in white activewear
Sohee Carpenter.

Sohee Carpenter

I started coaching clients in 2012 but I was rigid with my approach because that was all I'd been taught.

Even in college, I was trying to follow a strict meal plan, which made no sense: in my college dining hall, I couldn't eat a perfectly measured portion of chicken breast, broccoli, and almonds. Sometimes I'd eat 13 hard-boiled egg whites for lunch because I didn't know how else to track my macros.

I was very much of the mentality that the leaner you are, the healthier, happier, and better you are. The message I was pushing was super diet culture-heavy, as that was the norm for people who'd grown up in the '80s and '90s.

I was very, very fixated on being small and staying small.

As the years went on, I learned about flexible dieting and how I could hit my macros and still eat less nutritious food, but I wasn't thinking about the quality of my diet. I never cared about my fiber intake, all that mattered was whether my body looked good.

I now prioritize health over aesthetics

In recent years, I've become more aware of problematic messaging in the fitness industry. For example, people saying obesity is a choice, a moral failing, the individual's fault, or that it means you're lazy and less disciplined.

The coaching methods I'd learned earlier in my career were tied to weight stigma, and I now realize that approach doesn't help people in the long run.

Praising people for losing weight can seem harmless but it can perpetuate long-term problems like the irrational fear of regaining weight, which might encourage people to resort to unhealthy behaviors to maintain it.

If you're engaging in unhealthy behaviors to lose weight, it's not healthy.

Now, I don't care what your body looks like. Regardless of how you look, everybody deserves to have equal, non-stigmatizing access to healthcare and health-promoting behaviors.

I aim for 'body neutrality'

A lot of people label me as "body positive" but actually I'm not. However, I'm a big proponent of body neutrality.

It's not about loving every part of your body, it's more about being more neutral toward your body, not overly fixating on parts you do and don't like. It's about having your body be less of a focus of your life and take up less of your mental bandwidth, because I think that there are so many more interesting and important things that you could spend your energy on that are way more fulfilling.

Trying to love every part of your body is not only unrealistic, but it's still spending mental energy on your body. I'm not trying to bash body positivity, but it's not for me and it wasn't created for someone like me.

I love seeing more body diversity in the fitness and health space, and I think there's room for everyone to succeed regardless of how they look.

I strive for self-improvement

Sohee Carpenter deadlifting
Carpenter lifts weights and runs.

Ben Carpenter

I'm no longer focusing on changing how my body looks, but I still push myself hard and work out a lot.

I've always been a huge proponent of continual self-improvement across different avenues of life, but in fitness, I love the idea that I can continue getting fitter, faster, and stronger as I get older.

I'm 35 this December and feel much healthier than I did in my 20s.

I started running again 13 months ago and seeing myself getting faster is really cool. I'm incorporating mobility work into my training for the first time, and I appreciate the importance of quality time with my family and friends to my health.

I'm paying attention to my fiber intake and I'm so happy when I have loads of beans for dinner. I'm thinking about my sleep quality and quantity, all these things that were never a priority before. I now understand how they impact every aspect of life.

My motives for health-pursuing behaviors have matured. If you only ever care about aesthetics and that is your only motivation for eating and exercising in certain ways, that to me is a very shallow and one-dimensional view.

I'm grateful that I've learned what I have and can see a more multidimensional meaning behind what I'm doing.

I love the idea of working hard, challenging yourself, and holding yourself to a high standard, while giving yourself a break when you need to and not being so hard on yourself. That's how I'm trying to live my life.

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Blackpink's RosΓ© says 'squishy breaks' help her cope with anxiety

By: Erin Liam
28 November 2024 at 20:38
Rose visits SiriusXM Studios on October 10, 2024 in New York City
RosΓ© discussed how she copes with her anxiety.

Santiago Felipe/Getty Images

  • RosΓ© opened up about how she copes with anxiety.
  • The Blackpink member said she only noticed her anxiety recently and uses stress balls to help.
  • This is not the first time she has discussed mental health β€” a topic that can be seen as taboo in the K-pop industry.

K-pop megastar RosΓ© is speaking up about how she copes with anxiety.

On Wednesday's episode of "Therapuss with Jake Shane," the Blackpink member said she only started to notice her anxiety recently.

"I think it's gone really bad over these past few years," said RosΓ©, 27. She added that her friends who have worked with her 3 or 4 years ago have told her she's been "a little different" this year.

"And I was like, 'Am I?' I think that's probably the anxiety," she said.

The "APT" singer said she had never needed things like stress balls before. "I'm like, 'I don't understand stress balls, like why would you ever need them?' is what I thought, until I came across one during a meeting once. I was like, 'Ew, what is that?' I touched it and thought it was disgusting. And then I touched it again and was like, 'Oh, it's kind of a cool texture,'" she recalled.

From then on, she started using stress balls at "every single meeting," she said. "I ended up doing this serious meeting with somebody, and I got through it so well," she said. She realized it was the stress ball. "It just helps," she continued.

That's when she diagnosed herself with "bad anxiety," she said.

RosΓ© said that having a stress ball helps her to cope with anxious feelings. "If I'm going for it, I'm like, 'I know I have anxiety.' So I know how to articulate it," she said, adding that she can tell the people around her when she needs a 5-minute break.

"You know how people go for smoke breaks? I need a squishy break," she said.

This is not the first time the K-pop star has opened up about mental health β€” a topic that can be seen as taboo in South Korea.

"The blame lies with South Korean society in general," Ryu Sang-ho, a neurologist from Busan, previously told The Guardian following the suicides of K-pop stars. "Many people with mental health issues are reluctant to take medication for fear of being seen as weak-minded," Ryu said.

Last November, RosΓ© spoke at aΒ mental health event hosted by First Lady Jill Biden about the importance of taking care of mental health.

"In order for me to create and share positivity through my music, my mental health needs to be taken care of as a matter of priority," she said, adding, "Just as we train ourselves for better health and fitness, mental health can only be maintained with equally, if not more attention, as our physical well-being."

A representative for RosΓ© did not immediately respond to a request for comment sent outside regular business hours.

Managing anxiety at work

Anxiety is a growing issue in the workplace. A March report by mental health service provider ComPsych found that the No. 1 presenting issue reported by US workers was anxiety, based on their sample analysis of more than 300,000 US cases.

Marla Deibler, licensed clinical psychologist, previously told BI that anxiety is a normal response to stress.

"Let it in when it shows up. Practice acceptance. Rather than trying to push it away (which tends to be futile, resulting in feeling more overwhelmed and less in control), make room for anxiety," she said.

She added that not every thought is necessarily true and can sometimes be unhelpful. "Notice the thoughts. Note that they are not objective truths. You get to decide whether the thoughts are worthy of your attention."

Beyond tips like practicing deep breathing, consuming less caffeine, and staying connected with friends, people who live with anxiety can consider seeking professional help.

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