• Michael Allen stopped buying pricey Christmas presents for his friends and family in college.
• His financial priorities changed after leaving the Marine Corps and working toward his degree.
• Allen values time with loved ones over material gifts and emphasizes memories over money.

This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Michael Allen, a 54-year-old author from Titusville, Florida. It has been edited for length and clarity.

In 1995, I realized I couldn't give expensive gifts anymore. I was used to buying gifts to impress my loved ones, and I received nice gifts as well. At a younger age, I would get things like an Atari with games, boxing gloves, or a football. Gift cards, nice clothes, and even a watch were more common presents as I grew older.

As a college student and a recently retired Marine, my priorities were school and food. My next goal after serving in the Marine Corps was to get a degree. Not wanting to participate in the "who bought the most expensive present" game made sense.

I was getting by on side jobs

I tutored other college students and worked as a bouncer. Although I was only making enough money to cover my necessities, I was looking forward to achieving my goals of becoming an English teacher and a writer.

Buying extravagant things at the expense of putting myself in huge debt didn't seem attractive. I knew my financial situation had changed throughout my life, and I had to spend and save accordingly.

Reflecting on the hard work I put in made me extremely proud rather than ashamed of my financial background.

I decided to have a conversation with my friends and family

One day before Christmas, I asked my friends and family to lower their expectations regarding future gifts. I told them about my financial situation, what I could spend on, and what I was trying to accomplish.

Spending exorbitant amounts on Christmas was out of the question. Being open and honest about my struggles and primary issues worked out in my favor. I wasn't nervous to have this conversation.

Most of them understood, and I was truly relieved once I confessed. It immediately broke the needless superficial confinement I had put myself in to conform to the norms.

I also prepared myself to receive less of what I had previously

While some family members would still buy me costly gifts, some limited their splurging on me after this conversation. I was satisfied with getting whatever they would get me, even if it was nothing sometimes. Some even joined me in setting this boundary for themselves.

I started enjoying Christmas even more without having to impress people with my gift-giving superpowers. I became accustomed to speaking my mind and being truthful at all times. When you embrace life in that manner, many burdens are lifted.

Even as I make more money, gifts still don't seem important to me

My financial situation has improved, but I now sometimes only hand out one present per person. I make sure it's something meaningful and not just anything.

I once made my mother a loving video, and she still plays it often. On another occasion, I built a website for my daughter and made her a book. Personalization goes a long way.

Focusing on getting together with your loved ones and spending purposeful time with them are the only significant things of concern to me. Gifts are a component of Christmas, not the foundation.

Memories matter, not money. Food, drinks, old movies, and a good time is all I care about getting from anyone.

• Billionaire investor Ray Dalio wants people to give charity gift cards instead of material gifts.
• Recipients can decide which charity they want the money to go to.
• An expert in billionaire philanthropy said it could be good for wealthy people who donate to charity anyway.

Wall Street billionaire Ray Dalio is asking you to consider ditching buying gifts and instead give charity cards.

His "#RedefineGifting" campaign encourages his followers to give charity gift cards to their loved ones and request them in return.

Since 2020, Dalio, who founded Bridgewater Associates, has partnered with the nonprofit TisBest to give away 90,000 charity gift cards worth $5 million. The purchaser decides the amount, and the recipient chooses one of the 1.8 million US-registered charities on Tisbest's platform to donate the money.

"The shopping season has begun — a month-long compulsion to buy something, for everyone. We're pressed. We're stressed. And we waste time and money on gifts that might have little meaning," Dalio posted on X.

"Consider giving people donations to their favorite charities. And request that they give a donation to your favorite charity," he added.

A November Gallup poll found that US shoppers plan to spend an average of more than $1,000 on gifts this year for Christmas and other holidays.

Dalio has said in previous posts that he's given charity gift cards to his friends and colleagues for more than 10 years and has enjoyed learning about their favorite charities.

Dalio has pitched the "infectiously joyous and healthy" cards as simpler, easier, and different from material gifts that might be unwanted.

But charity cards may not go down well with those who — struggling financially amid historic inflation and heightened interest rates — would prefer a material gift.

Hans Peter Schmitz, a North Carolina State University professor researching billionaire philanthropy, told Business Insider that gift cards seemed a particularly good idea for wealthy people who might donate to charities anyway.

He advised ensuring everyone was on the same page and giving a more conventional gift alongside a card to avoid disappointing the recipient.

"It may be best to first ask and agree with family and friends that this is what everyone wants," Schmitz said. "It may also be worthwhile adding such a charitable gift along with something more personal."

"Any gift should still signify a personal connection and express more than just an expected transaction," he added.