• Kayla Barnes-Lentz is 33 but says biohacking has helped her reverse her biological age by 11 years.
• She views sleeping and red light therapy as biohacks, and says they are her favorite.
• Many of Barnes-Lentz's longevity treatments are experimental.

Kayla Barnes-Lentz wants to live to 150.

And, according to her calculations of her "biological age," she's making good progress. The 33-year-old longevity clinic owner and podcaster, based in Los Angeles, told Business Insider that biohacking has helped her reverse her biological age by 11 years.

In contrast to chronological age, biological age is a measure of how healthy cells, tissues, and organs appear to be. However, the idea is contested because we don't know how bodies "should" look at any given age.

Barnes-Lentz has a lengthy list of experimental treatments she does to optimize her health and try to live longer — from taking cold plunges to standing on vibration plates to breathing in hydrated air — which means she's essentially biohacking most of the day.

But of all her biohacks, she has two favorites.

Sleep

"Sleep is the foundation of health," Barnes-Lentz said. "Going to bed early and getting high-quality sleep is a game changer for energy levels, focus, motivation, and overall feeling."

She and her husband, Warren Lentz, wind down for the night by watching TV and cuddling. They go to bed at 8:30 p.m. most nights.

Research suggests that getting less than seven to eight hours of sleep a night is associated with a higher risk of chronic diseases, such as type 2 diabetes, heart disease, and depression, as well as issues with focusing and reacting. But 36.8% of Americans get less than seven hours sleep a night, according to data from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

Some biohackers spend thousands on sleep hygiene products and tech that isn't proven. Barnes-Lentz uses an Oura ring to track her sleep quality, but otherwise, she keeps things simple: she gets eight hours a night and never uses her phone in bed.

Business Insider previously reported on how to get the best sleep possible.

Red light therapy

Barnes-Lentz's favorite tech-based biohack is red light therapy. Her at-home sauna has an in-built red light, so she can do both at the same time.

She said red light therapy improves the functioning of the mitochondria, or the parts of cells that produce energy, which she hopes will increase her energy levels. In a 2024 study published in the Journal of Biophotonics, researchers found that red light appeared to improve the performance of mitochondria in the body — but there's no proof this leads to overall better energy levels.

Barnes-Lentz has also posted on Instagram about how she uses red light therapy to reduce skin aging and inflammation.

It has shown some potential for improving the appearance of skin, such as reducing scars, acne, and wrinkles, but more research is needed to guarantee that it's effective, according to the Cleveland Clinic.

Some people buy $150,000 red light therapy beds or do red light therapy treatments at spas or medical centers. Barnes-Lentz combines red light therapy with time in her sauna, which she does every morning.

• The 31st SAG Awards were held at the Shrine Auditorium in Los Angeles on Sunday.
• Celebrity couples, like Jonathan Scott and Zooey Deschanel, made a splash on the red carpet with their outfits.
• Adrien Brody and Georgina Chapman opted for matching monochromatic looks.

On Sunday, some of Hollywood's biggest stars showed up at the Shrine Auditorium in Los Angeles for the 31st Screen Actors Guild (SAG) Awards.

While the event was filled with couples dressed in their best outfits, Kristen Bell — the host — left her husband, Dax Shepard, at home to look after the kids. "We don't have very many babysitters who are ever available," she told People.

Nonetheless, the show must go on; Here's a look at some of the best-dressed couples of the night.

Jeff Goldblum and Emilie Livingston

Jeff Goldblum and his wife, Canadian dancer Emilie Livingston, arrived at the event hand in hand.

Goldblum wore a dark suit with a bowtie and a green scarf, while Livingston opted for a bejeweled silver gown.

Jonathan Scott and Zooey Deschanel

Jonathan Scott and Zooey Deschanel are a match made for the red carpet. The couple showed up in coordinated black-and-white outfits with bowties.

Adrien Brody and Georgina Chapman

Adrien Brody, who was nominated for best male actor for his role in "The Brutalist," and his partner Georgina Chapman opted for matching monochromatic looks for the red carpet.

Brody wore a black tuxedo with a bowtie, while Chapman was in a sculptural strapless gown from her own clothing label, Marchesa.

David and Emma Gyasi

David Gyasi wore a simple black suit with a high-neck white shirt, while his wife, Emma Gyasi, nearly stole the spotlight from him in a stunning red gown.

William Jackson Harper and Ali Ahn

William Jackson Harper and Ali Ahn stood out from the crowd in their outfits.

Harper looked dapper in his embossed navy-colored suit, while Ahn wore a cream gown with feathered shoulder details.

Zoe Saldaña and Marco Perego

Zoe Saldaña, who won best supporting actress for her role in "Emilia Pérez," looked stunning in her black velvet gown with bejeweled ruffled detailing.

Her husband, Marco Perego, an Italian film producer, opted for a more subdued gray suit with an olive-colored polka dot shirt.

Leighton Meester and Adam Brody

Leighton Meester and Adam Brody were both decked out in earth tones as they hit the SAG Awards red carpet together.

Meester wore a strapless dark green gown with cut-out details, while Brody wore a brown suit with a black tie.

• Alibaba has shifted its focus to artificial general intelligence, or AGI.
• The Chinese tech giant recently reported an 8% rise in quarterly revenue, boosting its stock price.
• Alibaba plans to invest $53 billion in AI and cloud over the next three years as it competes with US tech giants.

Hot stock Alibaba has set its sights beyond AI to focus on artificial general intelligence, or AGI.

"We aim to continue to develop models that extend the boundaries of intelligence," said Eddie Wu, Alibaba's CEO, on Thursday. He called the pursuit of AGI the company's "first and foremost goal."

AGI is AI technology that mimics human intelligence to the point that it can achieve complex cognitive tasks involving logic and reasoning.

US-based companies working toward AGI include OpenAI, Google, Meta, and Microsoft. Masayoshi Son, the CEO of major AI investor SoftBank, said earlier this month that he expects AGI to arrive "much earlier" than his late-2024 forecast of two to three years.

Wu's statement came after Alibaba released blockbuster results on Thursday. For the quarter ending in December, Alibaba posted an 8% rise in revenue, to 280.2 billion yuan, or $38.6 billion. Profit rose to 48.9 billion yuan, beating analysts' expectations.

"The pursuit of AGI can contribute immense business value," said Wu, citing studies indicating that AGI — when achieved — could replace or achieve 80% of human capabilities. He said about 50% of global GDP comes from wages for blue- and white-collar work.

"If AGI can be achieved, then that could have a tremendous impact in terms of the restructuring industry around the world. It could have a significant influence on or even replace 50% of global GDP," he said.

On Monday, Alibaba announced that it's planning to invest at least 380 billion Chinese yuan, or $53 billion, in cloud computing and AI infrastructure over the next three years.

The company is in a crowded global race for AI supremacy.

Chinese tech companies have come into the spotlight following the dramatic rise of DeepSeek, a startup that released a new cost-competitive AI model last month.

The development stoked investor concerns about the massive investment in AI in the West and turned investor focus toward China's tech companies, which have also been investing in AI.

US-listed Alibaba shares are up 70% this year to date, thanks to the boost from DeepSeek and after Alibaba announced that it was working with Apple to incorporate its AI into iPhones in China.

The upswing marks a major turnaround after Beijing's yearslong Big Tech regulatory crackdown, when cofounder Jack Ma's tech empire came under intense scrutiny.

Last week, Chinese leader Xi Jinping met with the country's top tech leaders — including Ma — in a sign that the country's private sector is now back in favor again.

The market is viewing the meeting as a possible end of the crackdown. The Chinese government is seemingly working to revive an economy disrupted by a pandemic, regulatory crackdowns, and a real estate crisis, wrote Deutsche Bank analysts in a note last week following the event.

On Monday, Hong Kong-listed Alibaba shares were 2.5% lower by midday after recent gains and as Asian stocks were broadly pressured by sharp losses in the US markets on Friday.

• Uber's CEO wants to work with Tesla on robotaxis. But Tesla wants to go it alone.
• Uber partners with Waymo in Austin and will compete with Tesla's autonomous vehicle platform.
• Analysts suggest Tesla may need Uber or Lyft to scale its robotaxi operations.

Uber's CEO, Dara Khosrowshahi, said he wants to work with Tesla on robotaxis — even though the electric vehicle maker isn't interested right now.

"At this point, they want to build it alone," Khosrowshahi said in an interview with Bloomberg at the Future Investment Initiative conference in Miami on Friday. "Life is long, but we would love to partner with them."

Khosrowshahi added that Uber and Alphabet-owned Waymo, who partner in Austin, will compete with Tesla in the autonomous vehicles market when they launch in the city.

Earlier this month, Uber said it was opening an "interest list" for Austin users who want to be the first to try Waymo robotaxis on the Uber app. Tesla unveiled its robotaxis, called Cybercabs, in October. They are expected to launch in June in Austin.

Khosrowshahi's Friday remarks came about a week after he said that he hoped Tesla would work with Uber.

In an interview published on February 14, Khosrowshahi said, "No one wants to compete against Tesla or Elon, if you can help it."

Door open for Tesla

Musk has previously said Tesla would create its own ride-hailing platform — a cross between Uber and Airbnb apps — for riders to call a driverless car. While a portion of the fleet would be owned by Tesla, individual Tesla customers would also have the option to add their vehicles.

Despite these plans, Khosrowshahi's Friday remarks suggested he was willing to keep the door open for a partnership with Tesla.

"It makes a lot of economic sense" for Tesla drivers to use Uber as a platform, he said. "What we bring is demand to the AV ecosystem when demand often is quite variable."

Analysts have stressed this, too.

In a note published on the day the Cybercab was unveiled, Jefferies analysts wrote that Tesla may struggle without a partner like Uber or Lyft.

Tesla "potentially underappreciates the obstacles to scaling a robotaxi fleet" such as the technology, asset ownership, regulation, fleet management, and demand required to run an operation at scale, the analysts wrote. "We also believe TSLA could struggle to scale fleet operations without offering access to demand via Uber/Lyft."

Independent analyst Dan O'Dowd, a previous Musk critic, said that the contrast between Tesla and robotaxi competitors like Waymo was "stark."

"Until Tesla robotaxis are transporting 100,000 paying customers a week around major American cities like Waymo does, Tesla robotaxi is nothing more than the latest work of fiction to come out of the Warner Bros. Studio," he said in a note at the time.

Investor pressure

Uber has faced pressure from investors to ramp up its autonomous vehicle strategy, and shareholders have been closely monitoring developments with self-driving competitors.

In December, Uber's stock plunged 10% after Waymo announced its expansion to Miami — without mentioning Uber.

In some cities, like Austin, Phoenix, and Atlanta, Waymo rides are only available on the Uber app. In Los Angeles and San Francisco, Waymo is available on its own booking platform.

Days after the Waymo expansion news, Uber's stock fell nearly 6% when its AV partner, Cruise, announced it was shutting down operations.

Following the Cruise news, the ride-hailing platform's chief financial officer, Prashanth Mahendra-Rajah, tried to quell investor concerns. He said the company was well positioned to be a demand aggregator for AVs and that it still believes AVs are critical for its growth.

Besides Waymo, Uber has self-driving partnerships with Tesla's biggest competitor, Chinese EV maker BYD, and with AV company Aurora Innovation.

Uber's stock is up over 30% so far this year.

• The 31st SAG Awards were held at the Shrine Auditorium in Los Angeles on Sunday.
• Many celebrities weren't afraid to show up in bold ensembles, some featuring elements like feathers and fringe.
• Danielle Deadwyler, Demi Moore, and Anna Sawai all wore sculptural gowns that turned heads on the red carpet.

The 31st Screen Actors Guild (SAG) Awards took place on Sunday at the Shrine Auditorium in Los Angeles.

Unlike other awards, such as the Oscars or the Golden Globes —which also honor directors, writers, musicians, and production teams — the SAG Awards are dedicated exclusively to recognizing actors.

Before the ceremony, which was hosted by Kristen Bell, some of Hollywood's biggest celebrities posed for the cameras on the red carpet.

Here are some of the most daring looks from the night.

Danielle Deadwyler

Danielle Deadwyler, who was nominated for best supporting actress for "The Piano Lesson," made a bold statement at the SAG Awards in a custom Louis Vuitton gown.

To complement her look, she wore bright red eyeshadow and matching red pumps.

Cynthia Erivo

Cynthia Erivo made a dramatic entrance in a vintage Givenchy gown designed by Alexander McQueen.

Her dress, made from a textured metallic fabric, featured fringe details at the neckline and sleeves.

Jamie Lee Curtis

Jamie Lee Curtis — who was nominated for best supporting actress for her role in "The Last Showgirl" — channeled showgirl energy at the SAG Awards with her black sequinned gown with a feathered top.

Jane Fonda

Jane Fonda, the recipient of this year's SAG Life Achievement Award, turned heads on the red carpet in a custom Armani Privé dress.

The peach-colored ensemble, which featured a wavy black pattern and a fringe skirt, was a departure from her usual menswear-inspired outfits.

Anna Sawai

Anna Sawai stunned on the red carpet with a custom Armani Privé strapless gown.

Her dress featured red crystals on the front with sheer side panels and a black velvet back.

Timothée Chalamet

Timothée Chalamet, who won best male actor for his role as Bob Dylan in "A Complete Unknown," wore a leather suit with a neon green shirt to the ceremony. To complement his look, he accessorized with a bejeweled bolo tie.

The actor's stylist, Taylor McNeil, seemingly drew inspiration from Dylan himself, posting a reference photo of the musician in a similar outfit on his Instagram story.

Fran Drescher

Fran Drescher, the president of the SAG-AFTRA actors' union, went for a menswear-inspired look.

Drescher rocked a baby pink satin pantsuit at this year's red carpet event — an outfit that looked similar to the one she wore to the 2022 Directors Guild of America Awards. This time around, she opted for open-toed wedges instead of pointed-toe shoes.

Demi Moore

Demi Moore, who won best female actress for her role in "The Substance," wore an edgy, drop-waist Bottega Veneta leather gown.

She styled her long black hair in loose waves and kept her makeup simple, but accessorized with a statement necklace and bracelet from Tiffany and Co.

Carl Clemons-Hopkins

Carl Clemons-Hopkins, known for his role as Marcus on "Hacks," turned heads on the red carpet in a black jumpsuit with oversized sleeves.

Tyler James Williams

Tyler James Williams, who plays Gregory Eddie in "Abbott Elementary," wore a red oversized suit with a cinched waist on the red carpet.

Banita Sandhu

Banita Sandhu, known for her role as Sita Malhotra in "Bridgerton," wore a sculptural metallic dress on the red carpet.

• The Pentagon is telling employees to "pause any response" to DOGE's request for a work report.
• Federal employees were told this weekend to list five tasks they achieved last week by Monday night.
• But the Defense Department has instead said it would be the authority to review its employees.

The Pentagon told employees on Sunday not to respond to an instruction from the White House DOGE office to list their work accomplishments.

"For now, please pause any response to the OPM email titled 'What did you do last week,'" the Defense Department wrote in a statement to civilian employees that was posted on X.

"The Department of Defense is responsible for reviewing the performance of its personnel and it will conduct any review in accordance with its own procedures," said the statement, posted on behalf of Darin S. Selnick, the acting defense undersecretary for personnel and readiness.

It added that the Pentagon would handle responses to the email request.

Selnick was referring to an email sent through the Office of Personnel Management, which asked federal employees to respond by 11:59 p.m. EST on Monday with five tasks or accomplishments they achieved over the last week.

"Please do not send any classified information, links, or attachments," said the DOGE email, which was sent to employees in federal agencies across the US.

It came just after President Donald Trump publicly wrote on Saturday that he wanted Elon Musk to "get more aggressive" in cutting workers and expenses from the federal bureaucracy.

Musk, who oversees the DOGE team, also announced the email on social media and said that a "failure to respond will be taken as a resignation."

The Defense Department did not respond to a request for comment sent by Business Insider outside regular business hours.

Other security-related government departments — including the Department of Homeland Security, the National Security Agency, and the Office of the Director of National Intelligence — did not respond to requests for comment from BI.

Representatives for the State Department and the FBI declined to comment on the DOGE emails.

• "Suits LA" is Aaron Korsh's spinoff of the original "Suits," which ran for nine seasons.
• It's led by Stephen Amell who plays Ted Black, a former prosecutor turned entertainment lawyer.
• The first episode ends with a twist for Black, who is reckoning with his past.

Warning: Spoilers for "Suits LA" below.

"Suits LA" — the new spinoff of Aaron Korsh's "Suits," which enjoyed a revival after landing on streamers — starts with a twist.

The first episode introduces Ted Black (Stephen Amell), a former New York prosecutor who moves to the West Coast to start his own law firm representing some of the biggest names in Hollywood.

"Suits LA" maintains the format of the original show by including flashbacks to subplots that explain the characters' actions in the present day. Mainly, these scenes explain Black's previous role as a prosecutor in New York working on jailing gang members for murder.

This plot device helped develop the backstories of beloved characters like Harvey Specter (Gabriel Macht), Mike Ross (Patrick J. Adams), Rachel Zane (Meghan Markle), and Donna Paulsen (Sarah Rafferty) in "Suits."

Black's character is developed when he talks to Eddie (Carson A. Egan), his brother, who seemingly lives with him.

Here's the twist in the closing moments of the first episode of Suits: LA" explained.

Ted Black talks to his dead brother in 'Suits LA'

The first episode implies that Black lives with his younger brother Eddie, who is there when he wakes from a nightmare. Other scenes also show that they have a close relationship.

But at the end of the episode, Black visits his estranged, dying father, (Matt Letscher) who is in a coma. Black tearfully blames his father for "letting them kill Eddie" the night before he was convicted for an unknown crime.

This moment reveals that Black has been imagining his dead brother this whole time, which some viewers might have picked up on since he wears the same New York Yankees shirt in every scene.

In the closing moments, Black tells Eddie him he just wants to spend another day with him.

It's a surprising move from "Suits LA," as the original show didn't have such abstract moments. But it's an interesting way of endearing Black, who is ruthless at work, to the audience.

• I'm a mom of two kids under the age of 4.
• I rely on my kids' boomer grandparents when I need childcare.
• They don't always understand the way I parent, but they try hard.

I'm a mom of a 4-year-old and a 7-month-old who attend day care while my husband and I work full-time. Boomer grandparents get a lot of grief for being unempathetic and aloof, but that's not the case for my family. My children's boomer grandparents are my childcare secret weapon and I couldn't be a working parent without their help.

I'm not the only one, either; I see our school's office administrators helping grandparents navigate the attendance system at least once a week. I've even become friendly with some of the grandparents I see regularly at pick-up. For some millennials, grandparents are an important part of our family ecosystem.

We heavily considered their proximity to us when choosing a home

When choosing our first home, it was important to us to have easy access to my mom and my in-laws, who are less than 30 minutes away, to ensure that our children could see their grandparents frequently. Both sets of parents are in their mid to late 70s; I had my first child at 36 and my second at 40, so their time together is precious.

When my youngest first attended day care, she only went three days a week. My mom and in-laws surprised me by offering to watch her the other two days so I could work full-time without paying for full-time care. I'm sure they would have offered even if they lived further away, having them relatively close has made a huge difference.

While they might not understand our new parenting systems, they try hard

I'm grateful that neither my in-laws nor my mom have ever questioned modern millennial parenting values and concepts. I'm sure they are internally rolling their eyes at me when I talk about sleep hygiene, bottle schedules, and gentle parenting. But they genuinely try to stick to my schedules and notes.

I've found that my part of this relationship is letting things go that aren't make-or-break; my child will be OK if someone forgets to put them in a sleep sack for a nap or if my mom makes a bottle by hand instead of using our fancy formula machine.

Thankfully, none of them has ever given me long diatribes about how they did things when we were babies. This mutual respect is what keeps our relationship healthy, and I'm grateful that they're open to learning the ways we think are best for our children at this point in time, no matter how ridiculous they might seem to them.

I've learned to pick my battles

As a first-time mom suffering from postpartum anxiety, I would internally flip out, watching them feed my toddler things riddled with added sugar and salt. It's been four years since I had my first child and their first grandchild. I've now realized their time together is more important than the details. While I would prefer that my preschooler not get diet tea sweetened with stevia, her tea party is much more important than what's in her cup.

They are there when we need them most

Now that both of my children are in full-time care, my mom and in-laws regularly pick them up from school to help me with scheduling issues or to give us a break from the grueling job of parenting. It can be frustrating when both sets are unavailable for holidays or sick days because they are almost always available and eager to help. These are the moments I have to catch myself and acknowledge how lucky I am to have two sets of grandparents at the ready.

• The FBI has issued a warning about a Chinese ransomware group called Ghost.
• Ghost has attacked critical infrastructure, schools, and businesses in over 70 countries.
• The FBI advises using security updates and multifactor authentication to prevent ransomware attacks.

The FBI is warning about a new ransomware hacker group called "Ghost."

The FBI published a security advisory with the Cybersecurity and Infrastructure Agency that said the group began indiscriminately attacking organizations in more than 70 countries starting in 2021. The warning from the FBI and the CISA says Ghost is now one of the top ransomware groups, targeting organizations all over the world as recently as January.

"Ghost actors, located in China, conduct these widespread attacks for financial gain," the report says. "Affected victims include critical infrastructure, schools and universities, healthcare, government networks, religious institutions, technology and manufacturing companies, and numerous small- and medium-sized businesses."

Ransomware is a type of malware that lets bad actors encrypt a victim's data until they pay a ransom. Ransomware attacks have become more common in recent years, sometimes targeting large companies or government infrastructure.

A ransomware attack in February 2024 against Chain Healthcare, the payment arm of healthcare giant UnitedHealth Group, briefly crippled the pharmacy industry after it caused a major backlog in filling customer subscriptions.

Most ransomware hackers use phishing methods, sending fake messages to victims in the hope that they'll click a link and install malware on their devices.

The hackers in the Ghost group, however, use publicly available code to exploit common vulnerabilities in organizations' software that have not been removed by updated patches, the FBI says.

"The FBI has observed Ghost actors obtaining initial access to networks by exploiting public-facing applications that are associated with multiple Common Vulnerabilities and Exposures," the warning says.

The FBI said in the warning that Ghost attackers usually claim that they will sell the victim's stolen data if they do not pay a ransom. However, the agency said they "do not frequently exfiltrate a significant amount of information or files, such as intellectual property or personally identifiable information that would cause significant harm to victims if leaked."

The FBI recommends consulting its StopRansomware guide for comprehensive information on how companies can guard against ransomware attacks.

Some tips for fighting against common ransomware tactics are to maintain regular system backups of sensitive information, patch known system vulnerabilities with security updates and use phishing-resistant multifactor authentication for company email accounts.

The FBI recommends reporting any ransomware attacks to the agency. In the security advisory, the FBI said it is particularly interested in "any information that can be shared, including logs showing communication to and from foreign IP addresses, a sample ransom note, communications with threat actors, Bitcoin wallet information, and/or decryptor files."

• At 23, Hong Kong was Hannah Ho's dream city, until it wasn't.
• She had moved there after graduation but when she turned 30, she knew it was time to move back home.
• She enjoys spending more time with family back in the UK but wants to continue exploring the world.

When I graduated with degrees in business management and Chinese, I didn't have a clear career plan. I just knew I wanted to live abroad.

I had spent two semesters in China — six months studying in Shanghai and six months completing an internship in Qingdao. That year, I took a 5-day trip to Hong Kong, and something about the city's energy and diversity drew me in. I decided I wanted to move there.

So, at 23, I took the leap and moved to Hong Kong. I was excited but also nervous. I was a fresh graduate with no real-world experience and had landed a nine-month job as a project coordinator for an educational foundation.

I thought it would be a short adventure, but I ended up staying for seven years. I transitioned into the recruitment industry and before I knew it, Hong Kong became home. I made a lot of friends and adapted to the city's fast-paced lifestyle.

But my life in Hong Kong began to shift in 2020. During and after the pandemic, the once-bustling city felt gloomy. Over time, I realized that the version of Hong Kong I had fallen in love with was gone. Some of my close friends had left, tourism had slowed down, and the once-thriving social scene had faded with fewer gatherings and events.

As the city changed, so did I. I found myself craving something new, a fresh challenge and the desire for a career change began to grow.

Moving home was hard

In 2023, and after I turned 30, I knew it was time to leave. Moving back home to the UK was not an easy decision. It meant leaving behind the life and career I had built, the friendships I had formed, and a city that had shaped me as a person.

I had never heard anyone talk about how hard it is to move home after being an expat. The truth is, you come back as a different person, shaped by experiences and perspectives that people around you may not fully understand.

Meanwhile, I quickly noticed that things back home had also changed. My parents were older, most of my friends had settled down, and the life I once knew felt both familiar and foreign.

One of the biggest challenges I faced was returning without a professional network. Having left the UK straight after university, I had built my career in Hong Kong. Now, I was essentially starting from scratch.

In Hong Kong, my well-established career provided useful connections. Back in the UK, I had to rebuild everything. I started getting back in touch with old friends and acquaintances, attending networking events, and leveraging LinkedIn to create new opportunities. At times, it was uncomfortable, but I reminded myself that I had done this before — I had built a life from scratch once, and I could do it again.

Not missing Hong Kong's work culture

For the first time in years, I had time to pause and reflect. It was a strange paradox — I had longed for more balance, yet I found myself missing the intensity of my old life.

There's so much I miss about Hong Kong: transporting myself from the hustle and bustle of Central to an island beach or a hiking trail in 30 minutes. I miss the food, the social scene, and the warmer weather. The sense of adventure that came with living in a place where something was always happening.

In Hong Kong, I shared a compact apartment with a roommate in a lively neighborhood. Big-city living meant being surrounded by high-rises and skyscrapers. Now, in Liverpool — a port city about 200 miles northwest of London — I've gone from apartment living to a house with a garden — something that once felt almost impossible in Hong Kong. With more space, fresh air, and quieter surroundings, home now feels more open and relaxed.

Coming back to the UK has brought its own joys. Spending quality time with my family has been a highlight, I notice myself appreciating them now in a way I never did before. I can drop by my sister and brother's places for home-cooked meals, a cup of tea, and just talk about life. These simple moments remind me of the comfort and connection I once took for granted.

I have a car, so I can drive to the countryside instead of relying on public transport.

Adjusting to the UK's work culture has also been refreshing. In Hong Kong, the work ethic was intense — long workdays were the norm, and efficiency was everything. There was a sense of urgency in everything people did. In contrast, the UK has felt more relaxed. The standard 9-to-5 schedule, hybrid/remote working models, and emphasis on work-life balance have been a welcome change.

Most importantly, I've been using this transition as an opportunity to pivot my career. While I still work a part-time job, I've decided to step away from the agency recruitment industry. Now, I'm building an online business that will allow me to work remotely and travel more. Because if there's one thing I've learned, once an expat, always an expat.

It does feel like I'm starting from scratch, but I see it as an opportunity to build something new on my own terms while embracing the lessons and experiences that shaped me abroad.

Got a personal essay about moving home after living abroad that you want to share? Get in touch with the editor: [email protected].

Twenty-two hours into tropical paradise, the money nerds started getting emotional.

In November, four dozen Americans and Australians converged in the spiritual heart of Bali, Indonesia, at a luxury resort filled with banana trees and the sounds of passing sheep. The crew was united by their commitment to the Financial Independence, Retire Early movement.

FIRE's promise: Embark on a super-saving path to ditch corporate drudgery ahead of schedule and retire on your terms.

On the first day of the retreat, we sipped on coconut water and focused on introductions. Attendees at the five-day, $1,800 retreat came largely from Big Tech, finance, and small businesses, a mix of five- and six-figure paychecks. At 22, I was the youngest person in attendance — by far. The other participants ranged from 35 to nearly 60 and included both those on the path to early retirement and those who had left their jobs years ago.

On the second day, people started opening up about what brought them to the island. This retreat came, like any financial product, with caveats and nondisclosures. During small-group sessions, we were instructed not to interrupt or ask follow-up questions. I agreed not to write details that might identify specific people.

Inside a bamboo-paneled room with the AC blasting, wooden chairs were arranged in circles of four, so close that our knees almost touched. The organizer, a retired teacher from Texas who moved to Bali, talked about mending her relationship with an estranged parent. Next up, her friend — a prominent financial independence influencer — described a painful interaction with his tween daughter.

Then the first member of our four-member group was up.

She spent a minute looking down at her flip-flops. Though she had been all smiles up to this point, when she finally spoke, she teared up and told us about a childhood family trauma.

The next man kept the emotional momentum going by talking about his loneliness. The third member of our quartet confessed how his obligations to his parents sometimes felt like a burden. I had rarely seen men cry, but here two did so one after the other. Last up, I thought about what troubled me, a 22-year-old with a dream job, a happy family, and good friends. I told them I was anxious that my sister's going overseas to college next year could pull us apart. I had never said that out loud.

Throughout that half hour, people sobbed, patted each other's shoulders, and, like me, struggled to show their solidarity without words.

The confessional set the stage for nearly a week of conversations — about stocks and Excel models, yes, but far more about personal growth and life optimization, replete with phrases like "accountability buddies."

After six months of writing about FIRE, I knew isolation to be one of the common downsides of retiring early. When all of your friends have a 9-to-5, nobody's around for lunch on a Tuesday.

At this retreat, I saw how deeply those feelings cut through a global community that often doesn't feel like a community at all. FIRE adherents need more than a lunch buddy — they're yearning for friends who won't shoot down their seemingly far-fetched plans, like retiring at 35.

"Any time I bring up net worth, my friends think I'm bragging," a five-figure employee with a job she hates told me over dinner. "Here I have people who are so much further than me in their journeys that I can talk about money openly."

Amy Minkley, the organizer who lives in Bali, said she came to appreciate the value of live, long events — not just a monthly happy hour or Zoom hang — in 2021 after attending her first retreat. Minkley had grappled with money issues since her parents' divorce during her childhood. She took on two jobs as a teenager to help her struggling mother.

"I felt like I met my tribe," she said about attending her first event. "I was so moved by the people that stayed up late with me and really counseled me through some big money scarcity issues."

Over the next few years, advice from new friends she made at these Bali retreats helped her sort her aging parents' long-term care.

"People don't often get that vulnerable until they've been around each other for multiple days," said Minkley, who retired at 44. "There's just something so valuable to be able to have conversations about money in real life."

Escaping judgment

Many outsiders associate the FIRE movement with fun-eschewing cheapskates.

Early evangelists, like the blogger Mr. Money Mustache, preached about living a bare-bones life to save as much as possible, then quitting your job the second you hit a certain threshold.

"There's been a lot of judgment over the years," a woman who started her path to FIRE in 2017 told me. "There's a lot of people that think that it doesn't work."

One American said she stopped talking about personal finance with her friends. They told her that they thought the FIRE community was a cult and that she was depriving herself.

"They just don't have the discipline to save and invest, so they think retiring early is impossible," the woman said.

"I still go out, I still travel, hell I even still drink Starbucks occasionally," she said. "It's hard to convince people that it's not about deprivation — it's about deciding what you value and spending on those things."

Over dinner with a Balinese fire dance and spicy Thai food, two women — both serial Financial Independence retreat attendees — told me their loved ones associated retiring early with laziness or lack of ambition.

Others said they needed someone outside their regular circle to give them permission to take the big step, whether it be to retire, to quit, or to actually spend money. A small-business owner told me she made two of the biggest decisions in her life — to start a business and to get a divorce — at similar events. She credits the phone-light, nature-heavy long weekends centered on Financial Independence, or FI, that feel more like adult summer camp than a financial workshop.

One woman in her 50s, who suffered from what's known in FIRE-land as "I'll resign next year" syndrome, asked a trusted person at this year's retreat to run through her finances to see whether she could retire. Back home in New York, a financial advisor had quoted her nearly $3,000 to do the same.

"This community is worth every penny," she said after a loud, late-night game of spoons.

FI influencers and Gen Xers who had retired years ago led breakout sessions with catchy names like "Financial Independence Next Endeavor" to talk about how to retire meaningfully.

The early retirees recommended creating a bank account to spend solely on experiences with friends and family. The session leader told us one of the best trips he had ever taken was last year's $20,000, 11-day cruise from Greece to Italy, with his mom and his adult daughter. His "fun bucket" helped him ditch the frugality mindset.

In an exercise about how to introduce yourself without mentioning work, a "FI-curious" couple with adult children struggled to talk about themselves. They had prioritized building their business for the past several years. They didn't know who they were without work — or where they would go if they decided to retire early.

'Accountability buddies'

On the last day, our 50-person group sat in a circle sporting a mix of loose tank tops and uneven tans. We shared one thing we promised to do to improve our lives after getting home. To keep on track, we were directed to find "accountability buddies."

One woman promised to talk to her FIRE-wary partner about her desire to move abroad. A business owner broke down and confessed that her work felt like a prison so she would consider hiring help. A couple with young kids said they would prioritize their sidelined marriage — though the two finance whizzes had recently hit nearly $2 million in net worth, they had never considered shelling out for household help or a full-time nanny.

"It's a cautionary tale," the husband said. "When the kids grow up and they leave, you look at each other and you realize you're two different people."

One man, whom I had always seen laughing and surrounded by others, teared up, saying he was going to try to forge more meaningful friendships.

When I checked in with some attendees in the weeks after the retreat, they told me their accountability buddies had stayed in touch. Some, like the couple with young kids, were following through on their improvement pledge — the duo had hired someone for household tasks and were trying to find an au pair.

On the eve of my 23rd birthday, I'm not gunning to retire by 30. Whether I have two or four decades of work ahead of me, the long weekend of drinking the coconut water made me want to invest in meaningful connections, not just my brokerage account.

I'll have my 30s and 40s to grow my career and net worth. But I need to enjoy friends and family now, while everyone is still fit and healthy. In the past three months, I have said yes to more activities and taken the initiative to plan others — a new tactic, because I often waited for loved ones to show they cared by asking me first.

And while I love my job as a journalist, I'm thinking more about who I am beyond it. As a kid, I dreamed of the hobbies I could pursue when I had my own time and money, untethered from school obligations. Now, I have no more excuses — and my accountability buddy is waiting.

• AI has triggered rapid advancements in the world of robotics.
• Companies are developing humanoid robots that can do chores or provide intimacy.
• Here are some of the most eye-popping videos showing what these new robots can do.

Is it Skynet? Probably not. Is it creepy? Kind of.

The futuristic humanoid robots in sci-fi movies that move almost like people are becoming more of a reality as AI advancements speed up their development.

Elon Musk said at a panel this month that he expects humanoid AI robots to unlock "quasi-infinite products and services." Musk's Tesla says it plans to begin production on "several thousand" of its Optimus robots by the end of the year.

Recent demo videos show how robots are beginning to look and sound more like humans. Recent videos of Tesla's Optimus robots show them walking around and scanning rooms for potential obstacles like something from "Terminator."

Some of the new humanoid robot designs are made to mimic a romantic partner. CNET, a tech publication, interviewed "Aria" from the company Realbotix at the 2025 Consumer Electronics Show last month. Aria, an AI-powered humanoid robot that's been described as a "digital girlfriend," answered questions about its design.

"Realbotix robots, including me, focus on social intelligence, customizability, and realistic human features designed specifically for companionship and intimacy," the robot says.

Aria says in the video that it is "interested in meeting" Tesla's Optimus robot. "I find him fascinating and would love to explore the world of robotics with him," Aria says in the interview.

The Aria robot moves throughout the interview like a human might, even taking a moment to brush its fingers through its wig.

Other videos show just how capable robots are becoming with their total range of movement. California-based Clone Robotics released a video last week showing its new Protoclone synthetic humanoid robot.

The robot is built with over 1,000 artificial muscles called "myofibers" that use mesh tubes filled with air to make the robot contract and move. Video posted by the company shows the robot swinging its legs back and forth while clinching and unclenching its fists.

Another Silicon Valley robotics company, 1X Robotics, shared a video showing what it would look like to have a humanoid robot inside your home. On Friday, the company posted a video of its NEO Gamma robot.

The company's website says the NEO Gamma is designed for household chores like tidying and home management. The promotional video shows the robot carrying a laundry hamper, using a vacuum, and collecting a package from a delivery person.

Some Reddit users seemed excited at the possibility of the NEO Gamma helping with chores around the house, suggesting the robot's help could trigger a "second renaissance."

"The renaissance didn't happen because people were working 9-5," one Reddit user said. "Robots need to get people out of the workforce."

• Warren Buffett includes some business lessons in his latest shareholder letter, published Saturday.
• Buffett said mistakes will happen. It's owning up to them that's important.
• He also advised against judging candidates by education, stressing the value of innate talent.

Every year, executives of publicly traded companies draft letters to their shareholders. These letters summarize the company's operations, detailing its annual financial results, major wins and losses, and outlook for the coming years.

There is perhaps no annual letter more anticipated than the one Warren Buffett sends to his Berkshire Hathaway shareholders. Investors and business leaders scour the letter for hints about the economy and financial strategies.

It also, however, often includes some more fundamental business — and life — lessons, too.

In Buffett's latest shareholder letter, published on Saturday, he wrote, "In addition to the mandated data, we believe we owe you additional commentary about what you own and how we think."

Business Insider read through this year's letter to gather Buffett's best insights.

Mistakes happen. Own up to them before it's too late.

Buffett said he's made many mistakes over the years.

Some have stemmed from incorrectly assessing the "future economics" of companies he purchased for Berkshire Hathaway. Others have come from hiring the wrong managers — miscalculating either their abilities or loyalty to the organization.

Between 2019 and 2023, Buffett wrote that he used the word "mistake" or "error" 16 times in his annual shareholder letter.

The point is that mistakes are normal in the course of doing business.

"The cardinal sin is delaying the correction of mistakes," he wrote.

Know the power of a 'single winning decision.'

According to Buffett, the corollary to acknowledging mistakes is recognizing the power of big wins.

"Our experience is that a single winning decision can make a breathtaking difference over time," he wrote.

He pointed to several key moments in Berkshire Hathaway's history — the strategic acquisition of GEICO, the decision to bring former McKinsey consultant Ajit Jain into management, and finding Charlie Munger, Buffett's longtime friend and business partner, who served as vice chairman of the conglomerate for more than four decades.

"Mistakes fade away; winners can forever blossom," he wrote.

Never judge a candidate by their educational background.

When it comes to selecting a CEO, Buffett has a rule: "I never look at where a candidate has gone to school. Never!"

Buffett pointed to the case of Pete Liegl, the founder and manager of Forest River, an RV manufacturing company that Berkshire Hathaway acquired in 2005. In the 19 years following the acquisition, Buffett said Liegl far surpassed his competitors in performance.

"There are great managers who attended the most famous schools. But there are plenty, such as Pete, who may have benefited by attending a less prestigious institution or even by not bothering to finish school," Buffett wrote.

Buffett's takeaway is that "a very large portion of business talent is innate with nature swamping nurture."

Keep saving.

Buffett believes that a long-standing culture of saving — and reinvesting — has been a key to the success of American capitalism.

Since the country's founding, "We needed many Americans to consistently save and then needed those savers or other Americans to wisely deploy the capital thus made available," he wrote. "If America had consumed all that it produced, the country would have been spinning its wheels."

Likewise, Berkshire Hathaway's shareholders have "participated in the American miracle" by reinvesting their dividends, as opposed to consuming them.

To ensure citizens continue to save and the country prospers, Buffett shared some advice for regulators: "Never forget that we need you to maintain a stable currency and that result requires both wisdom and vigilance on your part."

• Elon Musk's DOGE had emails sent to federal workers requesting a list of what they did last week.
• The decision frustrated federal workers, many of whom risk losing their jobs.
• A career coach told BI that DOGE's approach is "fear-based management."

Elon Musk's management style has once again sparked intense debate, this time for asking federal employees to respond to an email with what they accomplished in the past week — or risk losing their jobs.

Musk, a special government employee who is the face of the DOGE White House office, is known for his disruptive leadership style at Tesla, SpaceX, and X.

He is now applying those same tactics to federal operations — with mixed reactions from business leaders and government officials.

"This method is not just ineffective, it's harmful," George Carrillo, a former Oregon government executive, told Business Insider.

Carrillo, the CEO of the Hispanic Construction Council, previously worked as a program executive at the Oregon Department of Human Services.

"Overloading employees with unrealistic demands creates instability and causes talented workers to leave, which risks disrupting the continuity and expertise the government depends on to function," he said. "I've seen firsthand how these kinds of actions can harm team dynamics and reduce public confidence."

On Saturday, federal employees received an email asking them to respond with a five-bullet-point summary of their work in the last week and to copy their manager.

"Failure to respond will be taken as a resignation," Musk said in a post on X before the emails went out.

The emails appeared to be in response to President Donald Trump, who earlier said on TruthSocial that Musk should be "more aggressive."

The email resembled one Musk sent when he took over Twitter — now rebranded as X — in 2022. Following the acquisition, Musk instructed engineers to print out their latest software code for review as a way to evaluate their skills.

Some business leaders said DOGE's approach could yield results, despite the negative reaction.

Neal K. Shah, CareYaya Health Technologies CEO, told BI that the approach shows a "commitment to rapid organizational improvement" and has "unique advantages over traditional downsizing."

Shah said DOGE's method "slices through typical government delays caused by bureaucracy" and "directly empowers employees to control the documentation of their worth."

He also said it gives leadership real-time productivity data, which could lead to long-term benefits like better documentation of work-related tasks, efficiency, and boosting public trust through "demonstrated effectiveness."

Other management experts, however, said the email demonstrated a lack of empathy and could hurt morale, ultimately reducing efficiency. Federal employees told BI that DOGE's email left them frustrated and fearful of losing their jobs. One told BI the action felt like "harassment."

Lisa Rigoli, a human resources strategist and leadership coach who founded Elements of Change, a group focused on HR consultation and leadership coaching, said the email lacked emotional intelligence and prioritized "efficiency over human-centered leadership."

"This is a clear example of how leaders are becoming increasingly disconnected from the emotional impact of their decisions," Rigoli said. "Business schools and leadership programs do a great job preparing executives intellectually, but very few equip them for the emotional demands of leadership."

Tamanna Ramesh, founder of professional training service Spark Careers, said such tactics could damage staff morale.

"Requiring employees to justify their jobs through a weekly report — under the threat of termination — is fear-based management. It doesn't drive innovation or efficiency. It fuels resentment, disengagement, and quiet quitting," Ramesh told BI. "Accountability matters, but when employees feel like they're on trial rather than trusted contributors, performance suffers."

Ramesh said performance tracking is common, but the "level of public scrutiny and punitive framing is rare."

"This approach ignores psychological safety, a key driver of high-performing teams," Ramesh said.

Rigoli told BI that DOGE's email is part of a "growing trend where leaders handle layoffs with cold efficiency rather than intentional leadership.

"We ask employees to be loyal, transparent, and committed, yet when organizations make cuts, they often default to impersonal mass communication," Rigoli said.

"Efficiency isn't about arbitrary cuts or applying pressure for the sake of it," Carrillo told BI. "Successful organizations build trust, foster collaboration, and create thoughtful strategies to meet their goals while maintaining staff morale."

He suggested making "informed' and "data-driven decisions."

"Before considering layoffs, DOGE must conduct a comprehensive workforce analysis to pinpoint priorities and address staffing gaps," Carrillo said.

• Germany's center-right alliance is headed to victory in the country's latest federal election.
• The CDU and its Bavarian sister party, the CSU, are set to win about 29% of the vote, exit polls say.
• The far-right Alternative for Germany party is set to take second place.

Germany's center-right alliance appears set to win the country's latest federal election, which comes at a critical moment for Europe's largest economy.

The latest exit polls show the Christian Democratic Union and its Bavarian sister party, the Christian Social Union, with roughly 29% of the vote, with the Elon Musk-backed Alternative for Germany in second with around 21% of the vote.

German Chancellor Olaf Scholz's center-left Social Democratic Party is set to come in third, the polls showed.

This means the CDU's Friedrich Merz is poised to become Germany's next chancellor.

Single parties rarely win majorities in German elections, so Merz will need the support of one or more parties to secure a majority in government. Merz's most likely options for a coalition will be with the Social Democrats or the Green Party, with the possibility of a three-party coalition pending the final results.

The snap election followed the collapse of Germany's governing coalition in November after Scholz fired then-Finance Minister Christian Lindner, the chair of the Free Democratic Party, after Lindner rejected Scholz's demand to suspend Germany's debt brake, which requires the federal government to limit annual net borrowing to 0.35% of GDP.

Scholz called a vote of confidence which he then lost in December, paving the way for early national elections.

The CDU/CSU bloc had been projected to win the vote, polling at about 30% in the run-up to the election.

The CDU's popularity seems to have been boosted by its harder line on major policy issues such as migration, pledging to enforce stricter border controls and accelerate asylum proceedings.

It also wants to retain Germany's debt brake, cut corporate tax rates to a maximum of 25%, and "eliminate unnecessary red tape."

The CDU has also pledged continued support to Ukraine.

The vote comes at a pivotal time for Berlin, which faces an increasingly assertive Trump administration that has threatened tariffs on the European Union and looked to sideline Europe on negotiations with Russia over the Ukraine war.

Germany is a leading NATO member and a key provider of military aid to Ukraine — and it will play an important role in carving out Europe's future relations with the Trump administration.

Merz has pledged to bolster Germany's role on the world stage. In televised remarks on Sunday, the businessman outlined his view of the United States' posture toward Europe.

"My absolute priority will be to strengthen Europe as quickly as possible so that, step by step, we can really achieve independence from the USA," he said. "I never thought I would have to say something like this on a television program. But after last week's comments from Donald Trump, it's clear that this administration is largely indifferent to Europe's fate, or at least to this part of it."

Trump on Sunday congratulated the CDU/CSU bloc on his Truth Social platform — and then praised himself.

"Much like the USA, the people of Germany got tired of the no common sense agenda, especially on energy and immigration, that has prevailed for so many years," he said. "This is a great day for Germany, and for the United States of America under the leadership of a gentleman named Donald J. Trump."

The far-right AfD party came into Election Day in good spirits, buoyed by support from Musk and several strong showings in regional elections.

Musk — who appeared virtually at a party campaign event alongside AfD leader Alice Weidel in January — has praised the group's staunchly anti-immigration stance.

"Only the AfD can save Germany," Musk posted on X in December.

However, despite the AfD posting its best-ever result, it is unlikely to have a role in coalition talks.

• The 2025 Independent Spirit Awards took place in Santa Monica on Saturday.
• "Anora" was the big winner in the film categories, taking home best feature.
• Meanwhile, Netflix's "Baby Reindeer" nabbed three acting prizes.

The 40th annual Independent Spirit Awards took place in Santa Monica on Saturday, with "Anora" dominating in the film categories and Netflix's "Baby Reindeer" also winning big.

Sean Baker's sex worker drama took home multiple awards, including best feature, best director, and best lead performance for star Mikey Madison.

Madison picked up the trophy fresh off of winning best actress at the BAFTAs last weekend. The film itself has been on a hot streak in the final leg of this year's award season, nabbing prizes at the Critics Choice, PGA, DGA, and WGA awards in recent weeks.

Madison beat out Demi Moore as well as some of the year's most acclaimed male performers, including Colman Domingo and Sebastian Stan.

In short, "Anora" has gained some major awards season momentum. Per Gold Derby's latest predictions, the Neon indie drama is now the frontrunner to win in the best film and best director categories at the Academy Awards next month.

Elsewhere in the film categories, Sean Wang's "Dìdi" won best first feature and best first screenplay, while Kieran Culkin continued his winning streak as he picked up best supporting performance for "A Real Pain," which also won best screenplay for director-writer Jesse Eisenberg.

In other categories, "Nickel Boys" nabbed the best cinematography prize, "September 5" won for best editing, and "No Other Land" scored the win for best documentary.

Over on the TV side, "Baby Reindeer" went home with multiple awards. The Netflix series won three acting prizes for cast members Richard Gadd, Nava Mau, and Jessica Gunning who won for lead, supporting, and breakthrough performance, respectively.

The award for best new scripted series went to FX's "Shōgun." Meanwhile, "Hollywood Black" took home the award for best new non-scripted series.

The Independent Spirit Awards aims to celebrate the best in independent film and television, offering a more irreverent take on the Oscars.

Joking at the ceremony, returning emcee Aidy Bryant called it "Hollywood's third or fourth biggest night."

• My husband and I have a nine-year age gap; I'm in my 50s, while he's in his 40s.
• We often have to compromise on things, but sex can become an issue as my libido diminishes.
• Luckily, we have learned to compromise and put in effort while in the bedroom.

I never imagined myself married to a much younger man. It wasn't part of my plan. When my first husband died, I assumed my next chapter would be one of quiet companionship — if I found love again at all. But then I met him.

We had been friends for a few years and even worked together for a while. It wasn't until we met in person for the first time that things shifted. His smile made me weak in the knees; his energy was infectious, and before I knew it, I was smitten. The fact that he was nine years younger than me? That detail barely registered at first.

As our age-gap relationship deepened, I started noticing the ways our age difference showed up — not just in pop culture references or childhood memories, but in how we approached life, relationships, and, yes, even intimacy.

We have our differences as an age-gap couple, but we make it work

He was in his late 30s, still in his prime, while I was staring down the barrel of my 50s, navigating perimenopause, joint pain, a waning libido, and the occasional existential crisis in the beauty aisle. I worried about keeping up and about whether our differences would eventually pull us apart.

But love has a way of silencing doubts. From the beginning, we clicked on a level that transcended age. We laughed at the same ridiculous jokes, found joy in the same adventures, and, most importantly, communicated.

Sure, there are generational differences. I grew up with landlines and handwritten letters; he downloaded music off Napster before I knew what a digital file was. There are moments when our pop culture references completely miss each other; I'll talk about a classic song from my youth, and he'll respond with a blank stare, and vice versa.

But instead of seeing these differences as a divide, we treat them as a chance to learn from each other.

I introduce him to my favorite throwback R&B, and he gets me into shows I wouldn't have given a second glance. I teach him about the pre-internet dating world, and he keeps me up to speed on what's trending.

If there was ever an unspoken rule about relationships working best when both people are in the same generation, we never got the memo.

Sex and intimacy can get tricky, but it's all about making an effort

Sure, as an older person, I have a diminishing libido, but there's a misconception that younger men are always the ones with the higher sex drive and that older women are the ones trying to keep up.

What I've found is that libido isn't dictated by age alone. Some nights, he's ready to go, and I just want to curl up with a book. Other times, I initiate sex while he's wiped out from a long day.

Compromise plays a big role in our intimacy. He has more energy for spontaneous late-night plans, while I'm more of a "let's schedule sexy fun" kind of woman. We meet in the middle: I rally for the occasional late-night adventure, and he indulges my need for a well-planned weekend getaway.

What keeps our relationship passionate isn't just physical chemistry; it's effort. We don't just assume passion will take care of itself; we cultivate it.

We prioritize intimacy, not just in the bedroom but in the small ways we stay connected every day: the lingering touches in the kitchen, the flirty texts in the middle of the afternoon, and the date nights where we still dress up for each other.

Confidence is the most important for me

Society often suggests that women over 50 should fade into the background and be grateful for any attention they receive. This sentiment is reflected in a 2021 AARP survey, which found that nearly two out of three women aged 50 and older experience regular discrimination, affecting their mental health.

Despite these societal attitudes, I refuse to buy into the notion that aging should equate to invisibility or diminished value.

I don't try to be 40 again for my partner. I don't compete with younger women for him. I own who I am — laugh lines, wisdom, and all.

And that self-assuredness? That's what keeps the attraction alive. He didn't fall for me because I was trying to be something I'm not; he fell for me because I embrace precisely who I am.

There's no magic formula to an age-gap relationship

I've found that love doesn't follow generational rules. It's not about pretending the differences don't exist or trying to mold yourself into someone younger (or older). It's about meeting each other where you are, keeping curiosity alive, and never taking each other — or the spark — for granted.

At least, that's how we've kept the sexy alive and grown closer, even as we grow older.

Nine years apart? That's just a number for us. What really matters is that we keep choosing each other — one inside joke, one stolen kiss, one well-planned weekend romp, and one "how the hell do you not know this song?" moment at a time.

• Katy Allen has three children and runs a business.
• She has no family nearby, and her husband is a touring musician.
• She relies on home assistants for about nine hours each week.

This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Katy Allen, founder of Artful Agenda. It has been edited for length and clarity.

For the past eight years, I've relied on recent college graduates to help me make my life happen. They're not babysitters or admin assistants — I think of each helper as a "second me," who will do with any of the tasks I might, whether that's processing Amazon returns, putting away laundry, or taking the car for an oil change.

I'm a mom of three kids, who are now 11, 8, and 5. I'm also a business owner and was diagnosed with ADHD as an adult. My husband is a musician who is often on tour, and our closest family lives five hours away.

Hiring help fills an important gap for me. It allows me not only to get things done but, more importantly, to close some of the mental tabs that I constantly have open in my brain. Because of the help, I've been more successful at work and more present with my kids.

Find yourself also wishing for a body double? Here's how I've made the arrangement work seamlessly.

Find the right help

I live near a university, and that's where I've found most of my helpers. The women who help me are typically students or recent college grads. They might work for a year or two before moving on. When they do, I typically ask them to refer a friend who might be interested in the job.

If I have to advertise, I say right in the ad I'm looking for a second me. I explain that they might be asked to do anything I would do (within reason — I won't have them scrubbing up bathroom messes), and each day will look different.

Automate the process

Having a helper is all about reducing my workload, but a lot of my friends worry that hiring help will actually be more work. To avoid that, I automate as much as possible. My helper works a set schedule, typically two to three days each week for about three hours at a time. She has a key to my house and can let herself in and start working without me giving directions. Some days I don't even see her.

I keep a running list of items (like laundry) that constantly need attention in a Google Doc. If I have time each week, I add more pressing items, like returning items to the store, getting a birthday gift, or organizing a particular area of the house.

The Google doc is great because my helper can leave comments and notes, letting me know what she did and if she had trouble with anything. I can process that when I have time, rather than during my workday or when I'm with the kids. I can also provide simple feedback in the document.

Trust is key

As you can see, my helpers have a lot of access to my life. I even share another Google Doc with log-in information for certain accounts, like Amazon. A relationship like this only works if you can really trust the person who's working for you.

I've never had issues with a helper being untrustworthy. Once, I had a helper who just wasn't a great personality fit. She must have felt the same, because we parted ways fairly quickly, and I advertised the position again.

Start small

I pay my helper a decent rate, somewhere between what I'd pay a babysitter and what I'd pay a professional admin assistant. So, the cost can add up. When I started this eight years ago, I'd be surprised at how much I spend on hired help today. Yet, it makes sense because I am more productive at work.

If you're new to hiring help, start small. Hire someone for ad-hoc projects or for just a few hours a month, and see if the impact on your productivity and brain space is worth the cost. For me, it certainly has been.

• Antoine Sallis was rejected for a car loan because his credit score was 378.
• About a decade later, he was a millionaire.
• He repaired his credit and used debt to build wealth.

This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Antoine Sallis, author of "The Great American Credit Secret: Part 2." It has been edited for length and clarity.

The best thing that ever happened to my finances felt like the worst thing possible at the time. I was in my late 20s, working as a sales rep at Teen Mobile. I was proud of that job and felt like I was making moves. My next step was to get a decent car, better than the $300 cars from Craigslist that I'd driven in the past.

One day, I walked by a dealership with a sign that said, "Your job is your credit." I took that to mean that as long as I had a job, I could get approved for a loan. I already knew I'd have to go somewhere lenient to get a car loan, but this seemed perfect. I didn't think I had any credit, but I definitely had a job.

To make the purchase even more of a slam dunk, I saved a $500 down payment and picked the cheapest car on the lot, which cost about $9,000. I strolled in to apply, filling out the long paper application. I waited for about 20 minutes. Then, the sales rep came out, barely containing his laugh. He told me my credit score was 378 — so low that I was an exception to their rule, and they couldn't give me a loan despite my job.

I learned about the potential of responsible debt

I walked out of there feeling dejected. I'd been planning to drive off that lot. On my bus ride home, I started thinking about credit, which I knew basically nothing about.

I got tunnel vision, and started to learn everything I could about credit. I started with books and videos. Later, I called people who worked in finance, offering them $60 to answer my questions for 30 minutes.

I cleaned up my own credit, which started with understanding why it was so bad. Once I pulled my credit report, I saw I had unresolved accounts I didn't even know about and student loans with late payments. I started paying my debts on time to build a positive credit history. Soon, people began asking me to help them understand theirs.

As I learned more, I realized credit could be an incredible tool. Once my credit score was better, I took loans to invest in real estate. Most people think debt is bad. But I realized debt can give an opportunity: if you can take out a loan and triple your money over the life of the loan, that's a win.

My mindset made me a millionaire

When I embraced that mindset, things started changing rapidly for me. I started a credit repair company and continued to invest in real estate. By 2020, my company was doing very well, and I was a millionaire. Today I'm 42, and I'm a multimillionaire with a 780 credit score.

In addition to learning about credit and debt, I've seen that your mindset can make a huge difference in your outcomes. Some people in my life are constantly looking for a handout, and they're stuck in a mindset of believing they can't do things. I used to be that way, but I changed.

I became a millionaire in my mind before I ever became one at the bank, because I adopted a strong mindset. I became focused and driven.

I pay for my son's college and give him an allowance

The importance of mindset is what I want my son, who is 18, to take from my story. I can see he's learned that lesson. He used to have C's and D's on his report card, but since he moved in with me, he's a straight-A student. He's about to graduate, and I'm rewarding his hard work by paying for college.

Throughout high school I gave my son a generous allowance, with the expectation that he'd keep his grades up. I pay for everything he needs, but if he wants money to hang out with friends, he knows that's his responsibility. He's seen my financial transformation, and I've talked with him since he was 10 about the importance of credit. Today, I think he knows more about credit than most people, and he even helps with my business teaching others about building their credit.

Now, I have good enough credit to drive luxury cars

That day when I was rejected for a car loan, I laughed along with the salesman. But really, it was no laughing matter. Today, I have multiple luxury cars, which I love. The Lamborghini Gallardo is probably my favorite, though my Bentley is really comfortable.

I want people to know that no matter how dismal your financial situation feels, you can change it. Leveraging credit and debt is a hidden avenue for people who didn't grow up wealthy to build their financial security. You can access more and more, as long as you do it responsibly.

• The Oscars are on Sunday, March 2.
• Edward Norton and Cynthia Erivo are two of this year's nominees who've never won an Oscar before.
• Norton received his fourth nomination for best actor in a supporting role for "A Complete Unknown."

The Academy Awards are just around the corner, and while some stars like Mikey Madison are competing for their first award, others, like Edward Norton and Cynthia Erivo, are entering familiar territory.

This year, Norton is nominated for his fourth Oscar for his portrayal of Pete Seeger in "A Complete Unknown" and Erivo is nominated for her third thanks to her performance as Elphaba Thropp in "Wicked." Both will be looking for the first Oscar win of their careers on March 2 at the Dolby Theater in Los Angeles.

And they're not alone. Call it a snub or simply not the right time, plenty of other actors, directors, producers, and others in the industry are still waiting to receive their first Academy Award — much to the public's surprise.

From Bradley Cooper to David Fincher, here are 20 Hollywood stars we can't believe have never won an Oscar.

Carrie Wittmer contributed to an earlier version of this story.

Amy Adams

Adams has earned six Oscar nominations throughout her career, thanks to her roles in films like "Doubt," "The Fighter," and "American Hustle."

Her most recent nomination came in 2019, for her role as Lynne Cheney in Adam McKay's "Vice."

Bradley Cooper

Cooper has been nominated for 12 Oscars across five categories, including best actor, best supporting actor, best picture, best adapted screenplay, and best original screenplay for films like "Silver Linings Playbook," "A Star Is Born," and "Maestro."

In 2024, Cooper's Oscars campaign for "Maestro" was widely criticized; as Business Insider's Olivia Singh wrote, "Cooper's effort to pay homage to the late musician was earnest, but his TMI approach to promoting the film during the press tour and awards season gave people the ick."

Taraji P. Henson

It may come as a surprise that Henson has only earned one Oscar nomination in her career despite starring in critically acclaimed films like "Hustle & Flow" and "Hidden Figures."

Still, her only nomination came in 2009 for best supporting actress for her role as Queenie in "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button."

Saoirse Ronan

Despite being just 30 years old, Ronan has earned an impressive four Oscar nominations without taking home the trophy.

Her first nomination came in 2008 — when she was only 13 years old — for her role as Briony Tallis in "Atonement," and her most recent nomination was in 2020 for her role as Jo March in Greta Gerwig's adaptation of "Little Women."

Greta Gerwig

Speaking of Gerwig, the American director and screenwriter also has been nominated for four awards throughout her career.

Her most recent nomination came in 2024 for best adapted screenplay for the cultural phenomenon "Barbie." Cord Jefferson ultimately took home the award for "American Fiction."

Paul Thomas Anderson

Thanks to his work on films like "There Will Be Blood," "Phantom Thread," and "Licorice Pizza," Anderson has earned 11 Oscar nominations across four categories, including best picture, best director, best adapted screenplay, and best original screenplay.

Glenn Close

Close has been nominated for eight Oscars across the best actress and best supporting actress categories.

She earned her first nomination in 1983 for her role as Jenny Fields in "The World According to Garp" and her last in 2021 for her role as Mamaw in "Hillbilly Elegy."

Ed Harris

The iconic character actor has earned four nominations throughout his impressive career. His last nomination was in 2003 for best supporting actor in "The Hours."

Don Cheadle

Cheadle has only been nominated for an Oscar once for his role as Paul Rusesabagina in "Hotel Rwanda." Jamie Foxx ultimately took home the award for best actor for his performance in "Ray."

Still, Cheadle is one of few actors to have been nominated for every component of an EGOT, or Emmy, Grammy, Oscar, and Tony award.

Ralph Fiennes

Fiennes has earned three Oscar nominations, including a best actor nod this year for his role as Cardinal Lawrence in "Conclave."

He was previously nominated in the category in 1996 for "The English Patient," and in 1994 he was arguably robbed of the award for best supporting actor for his role in Steven Spielberg's "Schindler's List."

Michelle Williams

Since the ending of "Dawson's Creek," Williams has proved she's much more than just another teen soap star.

Throughout her career, she's earned five nominations, the most recent of which came in 2023 for her leading role in "The Fabelmans."

Edward Norton

Norton has been nominated for four Academy Awards thanks to his work in "Primal Fear," "American History X," "Birdman," and most recently, the Bob Dylan biopic "A Complete Unknown."

This year, Norton will compete against Yura Borisov, Kieran Culkin, Guy Pearce, and Jeremy Strong for best supporting actor.

David Fincher

Fincher has three Oscar nominations for best director for "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button," "The Social Network," and "Mank."

His distinct style and impressive line of work — including "Seven," "Fight Club," "Zodiac," and "Gone Girl" — is bound to get a win one day.

Cynthia Erivo

This year, Erivo is nominated for her third Oscar thanks to her gravity-defying performance as Elphaba Thropp in Jon M. Chu's "Wicked."

In 2020, she was nominated for best actress and best original song for her work in "Harriet." She lost the former to Renée Zellweger and the latter to Elton John and Bernie Taupin.

If she wins the Oscar this year, Erivo will reach EGOT status.

Sigourney Weaver

Weaver has been nominated for three Oscars, including a best actress nod in 1987 for her role as Ripley in James Cameron's "Aliens."

In 2015, while promoting the film "Chappie," Weaver told Digital Spy that the science fiction genre "doesn't get enough respect when you consider how many issues sci-fi brings up that we need to deal with."

"I think part of it is the Academy is mostly people like me who are over a certain age and they're still probably looking for the more conventional movie. I think all that's going to change because some of the work being done in sci-fi is some of the most interesting, provocative work out there," she added.

Tom Cruise

Though he's arguably best known for his work in action films like "Mission: Impossible," Cruise has delivered Oscar-worthy performances, too.

His ambitious work in Paul Thomas Anderson's "Magnolia" got him a best supporting actor nomination in 2000, but he lost to Michael Caine for his work in "The Cider House Rules." He's also been nominated for lead roles in "Born on the Fourth of July" and "Jerry Maguire."

Annette Bening

Bening has earned five nominations spanning from 1991 to 2024.

Her latest nomination was for her portrayal of Diana Nyad in "Nyad," which she lost to Emma Stone for her performance as Bella Baxter in "Poor Things."

Kathleen Kennedy

Producer and current president of Lucasfilm Kathleen Kennedy has been nominated for eight Oscars for best picture.

Some of these nominees include iconic films like "E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial," 1985's "The Color Purple," and "The Sixth Sense."

Ridley Scott

The stylish director has been making feature films since the late '70s, but he has only been nominated for four Oscars.

Though "Gladiator" took home the award for best picture in 2001, Scott lost out on the Oscar because he wasn't one of the film's producers. He was, however, nominated for best director, but ultimately lost to Steven Soderbergh.

Scott's other nominations include best director nods for "Thelma & Louise" and "Black Hawk Down," as well as a best picture nomination as a producer of 2015's "The Martian" starring Matt Damon.

Liam Neeson

Neeson's sole Oscar nomination came in 1994 for his performance as Oskar Schindler in "Schindler's List."

He lost the best actor award to Tom Hanks, who played Andrew Beckett in Jonathan Demme's "Philadelphia."