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My daughter dropped out of high school at 16. She'll be attending a Big Ten College as a junior at 18.

Melissa hart, left, with her daughter, right
My daughter dropped out of high school to study marine biology at a community college.

Courtesy of Melissa Hart

  • My daughter told me she was dropping out of high school at 16.
  • I didn't argue and gave her the space to take a courageous leap into early adulthood, instead.
  • "My high school's full of drugs and drinking. I don't want to get into trouble," she told me.

A week before the start of her high school junior year, my 16-year-old daughter walked into the kitchen with a smile of pure delight. "I emailed my principal," she reported. "I said it gave me great pleasure to inform her that I'd no longer be attending her school."

I attempted to maintain a neutral expression like the one I'd affected when β€” for show and tell in a middle-school science class β€” she'd brought a leech from her tank in the corner of our living room where she kept three of them along with several bullfrog tadpoles and a crayfish.

"So what will you do about high school this year?" I asked. She'd grown more and more miserable in high school, bewildered by constant social drama and classes full of busy work.

She immediately answered: "I'm going to community college to study marine biology."

"Good plan," I said, but my brain whirled with questions.

My daughter didn't want to get in trouble at school

My daughter has sprung similar revelations on me her entire life.

As a person with ADD, she's struggled with traditional classrooms since kindergarten, finding it difficult to concentrate in a room packed with peers unless she's thoroughly engaged with a subject.

Over her 12-year education, she tried public schools, charter schools, homeschooling, and private schools. I learned to be flexible and curious rather than rigid and angry. Dropping out of high school completely, though, was a new development.

Over my shoulder at the kitchen table, she said in her defense. "My high school's full of drugs and drinking. I don't want to get into trouble."

I worried about a different kind of trouble.

"Is this really legal?" I kept asking her College Now advisor β€” as if a Truant Officer might nab my teen en route to her beloved marine biology class and haul her back to high school.

"It's legal," said the advisor, who I had on speed dial. She just needs to enroll in the right transfer courses and take her GED exam, the equivalent of a high school diploma, the advisor said.

I brushed up on my research and discovered my daughter's decision could be for the best.

"Community college can be a great way to explore interests inexpensively before committing to a major," I read in the book "The Complete Guide to College Transfer: Find Your Ideal School, Maximize Your Credits, and Earn Your Degree."

The book tells students of any age to consider working toward an associate degree while enrolled at community college. "Not only is it a valuable credential on a resume, but it can also provide transfer benefits with partner universities."

So, my daughter and I worked with her advisor to devise a two-year plan for earning her Associate's degree at the community college and taking her GED.

However, as a young higher-education student, my teen was slightly out of her element. Initially, I helped her find her classes, taught her how to email her professors, and deconstructed her syllabi with her to figure out homework assignments and what textbooks to order. All of this was only possible thanks to my flexible work schedule.

Dropping out of high school was the right move

I admit to some sadness. I adored my high school, and I'm sorry my daughter didn't have the same positive experience.

However, different brains crave different pathways to education.

Despite my trepidation, I gave my daughter the space to take a courageous leap into early adulthood.

She passed her GED exams and is transferring to the University of Oregon next year as a junior.

These days, she wakes up at 9 a.m. and heads for classes she finds meaningful and relevant.

She hangs out with her classmates at lunchtime, comes home mid-afternoon to study, and then goes to the dance studio.

Just 18 and in her second year of college, she's become an independent and joyful young woman.

Read the original article on Business Insider

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