• I love the holiday season, but there are some things about it that stress me out.
• In the past, I've found myself doing too much and saying "yes" to too many things.
• This year, I'm approaching the season differently so I can enjoy it.

I love visiting with family and friends, gift-giving, and all that comes with the holiday season. Most years, though, as this time of year approaches, I'm filled with a sense of contradiction: excitement for what's ahead and an unavoidable subtle sense of dread.

As a mom for over 13 years now, I've finally pinpointed exactly the problem. I've been in the habit of saying, "Sure," "Yes," "I'll be there," or "I can help" too many times during the season, even if I didn't have the time or energy. It's left me frustrated, hurried, stressed, and downright exhausted.

I started by creating boundaries around travel

The first time I vowed to seek more rest for myself during the holidays was 13 years ago. After several hours of travel and multiple stops to visit family, all with a newborn in tow, I knew the pace could not be kept. I will never forget the trauma of trying to find a quiet place to nurse my baby amid the chaos of family members I barely knew.

Little by little, each year, I've pulled back on our Christmas Day travel. This might be the biggest and happiest change I've implemented for myself and my family. I'm saying "no" to hours of travel time this year, and we're staying home for Christmas.

Miraculously, grandparents and family members have all been understanding. In fact, many of them lamented the same issues with travel on Christmas Day and are choosing to stay home, too. The good news is my door is open, and if anyone wants to see me or my immediate family on Christmas Day, they'll know exactly where to find us.

But still, over the years — even as I've created more boundaries around travel — I've gotten in the habit of doing too much, and it's affected my ability to enjoy the holiday season.

This year, I'm doing less cooking and baking, too

Last year, and for most years in the past, my husband would volunteer to cook the turkey for my side of the family for the Thanksgiving meal. But this year, we said we couldn't. We'd already planned a road trip for my son's birthday, so the time we had to spend on a homemade dish was significantly shorter.

We simply didn't have the time to fry a large turkey and encouraged my family to have someone else cook it. My mom ordered one, and it was just as juicy as any home-cooked bird. It lightened the load, and I vowed to keep the momentum going.

Leading up to Christmas Day last year, kind neighbors dropped off homemade items on our doorstep. We adore our neighbors, and the homemade goodies were a delight each time we opened the door. But each time I discovered a homebaked treat, I felt pressure to make or bake my own gift to reciprocate the kind gesture.

In a panic, I whipped up some last-minute treats and hauled them to each neighbor's home. I love to cook, but there wasn't much joy in the process under the pressure. Looking back, I realize there was a better way, so I'm handling it differently this year. I now see that my neighbors actually don't expect a gift in return, let alone something homemade. So, to split the difference, I'm purchasing my favorite brand of store-bought shortbread cookies, plopping a bow on top, and wishing them all my merriment without baking anything.

I'm also pulling back when it comes to volunteering at my sons' schools

Volunteering at my sons' schools has always been a page from the same story. As with many parents, in years past, there's been the tug for me to attend the holiday sing-along, organize the holiday party snacks, or brainstorm and collect materials for a festive craft.

While I do love attending and being involved at my sons' schools, the issue is that with work, appointments, and my own holiday goals of reading more and sitting by a fire more often this year, I'm just not raising my hand first to head it all up. Instead, I've opted to send in supplies or choose the events I truly enjoy being at. My sons are older now, and I'm resting easy knowing they're more concerned with the football game at recess than the reindeer craft they created during the holiday party.

While my desire to do it all came from good intentions and expectations from myself and others, I didn't want the stress I had felt in the past by giving too during past holiday seasons. I realize now I do have a choice in the matter.

I'm saying "no" more than ever in an effort to protect my time and my family's time, and I'm enjoying more that makes me happy: fireside reading time, a cup of coffee with extra whipped cream, and the twinkle of the lights on my own Christmas tree this year.

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With 28 full days left in office, President Biden announced Monday he is commuting the sentences for 37 of the 40 people on federal death row, converting their punishments to life without possibility of parole.

The big picture: Biden promised to abolish federal use of the death penalty when he campaigned for the White House in 2020.

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What he's saying: "Make no mistake: I condemn these murderers, grieve for the victims of their despicable acts, and ache for all the families who have suffered unimaginable and irreparable loss," Biden said in a statement. "But guided by my conscience and my experience, ... I am more convinced than ever that we must stop the use of the death penalty at the federal level."

• In a jab at President-elect Trump, Biden added: "In good conscience, I cannot stand back and let a new administration resume executions that I halted."

Zoom in: The move spares the lives of people convicted in killings, including the slayings of police and military officers, people on federal land and those involved in deadly bank robberies or drug deals, as well as the killings of guards or prisoners in federal facilities, AP reports.

Between the lines: Three federal inmates still face execution.

• Dylann Roof, the white supremacist who carried out the 2015 racist slayings of nine Black members of Mother Emanuel AME Church in Charleston, S.C.
• Dzhokhar Tsarnaev, who helped carry out the 2013 Boston Marathon bombing, which left three dead and scores injured.
• Robert Bowers, who fatally shot 11 congregants at Pittsburgh's Tree of Life synagogue in 2018, the deadliest antisemitic attack in U.S. history.

Context: Biden in 2021 announced a moratorium on federal capital punishment to study the protocols used.

• There were 13 federal executions during Trump's first term, more than under any president in modern history.
• Biden faced recent pressure from advocacy groups urging him to act to make it more difficult for Trump to increase the use of capital punishment for federal inmates.

• 28-year-old Aamanh Sehdev was named a McKinsey partner this December.
• After joining as a summer intern, he's climbed the ranks in just seven years.
• Sehdev spoke to BI about how he heard the news and what helped him progress at McKinsey.

Aamanh Sehdev had spent a week in early December trying to distract himself by seeing friends and playing padel.

He'd been an associate partner for two of his seven-year career at McKinsey and knew there was a chance he'd be promoted to partner.

But there was a low number of elections this year, so he thought it was fifty-fifty.

The news usually arrives at the end of the week. But at around 8:30 p.m. on Wednesday, Sehdev received a call at home. It was from Tunde Olanrewaju, managing partner of McKinsey's UK, Ireland, and Israel offices.

"The nerves were kicking in, but he got straight to the point," Sehdev told Business Insider.

"Hey, it's great news. Welcome to the partnership. We're really excited to have you on board," Sehdev recalled Olanrewaju telling him. "I said thanks, but in a slightly higher pitch voice than I typically have."

Sehdev is one of around 200 McKinsey employees promoted to partner this December. Amid a slowdown in demand for consulting services, this year's cohort is one of the firm's smallest in recent years.

The promotion elevates him to one of the most senior positions you can reach in a major consulting firm. Partnerships are participatory, giving individuals a say in the direction of the firm. Those promoted to equity partners receive a share of the annual profits.

On McKinsey's website, partners are described as "not only meeting McKinsey's high bar for exceptional leadership, but they are also dedicated to finding solutions to some of the world's most pressing challenges."

At 28, Sehdev is one of the youngest in the cohort. He spoke to BI about what it was like to receive the news and what it takes to make partner.

'Enjoy the moment'

Although his call with Olanrewaju lasted only a few minutes, Sehdev spent the next hour and a half on the phone with sponsors and mentors.

"Obviously, there was a lot of excitement, a lot of congratulations, and a bit of a common thread of 'let it sink in, don't rush into the next thing, enjoy the moment,'" he said.

He also called his mother and brother that evening. His parents didn't go to university, so it was a major milestone for the family. "They were super proud and excited," he said. "They've obviously been pretty key in shaping my journey."

But the following morning, it was into the office to carry on as usual and keep the news a secret from his colleagues until McKinsey's formal announcement a week and a half later.

Sehdev said he was still digesting the achievement. In the new year, he's taking a 17-day trip to Australia to "carve out a little bit of time to think about it a bit more formulaically."

His first focus is to switch off and get some sun, he added.

Becoming a partner is notoriously difficult and competitive. It's the ultimate goal for many consultants starting their careers.

Not for Sehdev.

When he began studying mechanical engineering at London's Imperial College, Sehdev had never heard of McKinsey.

"It was something that people around me were talking about alongside banking," he told BI. "I turned up to a career fair, it was interesting, and I applied for the internship."

For the first half of his career, Sehdev said he was doing "a bit of a random walk" through a whole host of sectors and different functions. It helped him find the right home at the firm — he now works on a combination of private capital and McKinsey's telecommunications (TMT) practice.

Sehdev acknowledged that seven years was a fast ascent up the ranks, but said that meritocracy was one of McKinsey's benefits.

"What McKinsey has a tendency to do is when you get comfortable, they take you to the next role or level, and then you get uncomfortable again. That snowballed for me over the last seven years."

Sehdev said three reasons he was selected as a partner came through in his evaluation.

First, he always has a focused strategy for what he's doing and what he wants to do next at the firm. Second, he showed entrepreneurship and originality, particularly when it came to creating novel ways to work with the smaller software businesses he concentrates on. Lastly, he invested time with the teams and created a positive, energizing atmosphere.

There's an element of luck involved in it as well, he added, saying he was fortunate to have met managers early on who would stay late in the evenings to teach him.

No matter how good you are, working at a top consultancy can be intense. Sehdev said he carves out time to exercise, spend time with family, and protect his weekends. He doesn't expect that to change now he's a partner.

"My mindset has always been, look, I'll set a really high bar, but I'll not let the micro-events or little things take away too much energy. That's made me better at my job."

• I'm a mom of two and share custody with my ex-husband.
• I prepare gifts early and focus on self-care when they are not with me.
• As they get older, they still want to do holiday things with me, which makes me happy.

I remember the last Christmas as a family. There was the star on the tree, presents wrapped for the kids, and eggnog in the fridge, all while I was fending fights with my now ex-husband.

When I signed a lease on an apartment a couple of months later, I left behind the Christmas tree, the stockings, the nutcrackers, and every ornament.

I bought a new tree and ordered Christmas stockings, new ornaments, and some decorations as a fresh start after the divorce. That first Christmas as a single mom, I wanted to get my kids something special and playful. The snow globes I purchased are engraved with the year everything changed in our lives, four years ago.

It's hard not having them every year

As a divorced mom, I'll admit it isn't easy to accept that I won't see my kids every Christmas morning anymore. I've had my kids two Christmas mornings since our family split. I'm overjoyed this year my kids are with me again. I feel immense happiness knowing my kids will wake up at my home and dash to the tree at the crack of dawn instead of when they arrive mid-morning after being with their dad first.

There's always a little grief when I wake up on Christmas morning, and my kids aren't here. The waiting is excruciating for me. The divorce decree states that spending time with the kids for Christmas is split between even and odd years.

Navigating holidays as a divorced parent can feel stressful, and what's helped is keeping traditions going, even if it means doing it myself. The first Christmas when it was just me and the kids, the reason I didn't fall into depression was because the kids and I put up the tree early together, we went to see the holiday lights at the zoo, and watched "The Polar Express," the Elf on the shelf carried on, and holiday songs were on repeat at my home.

The festivities showed my kids that the magic of Christmas is alive at my home. I assured them that the holiday would be a joyous time, even though the family dynamic changed.

I prepare early for the years they are not with me

I've learned to prepare early for gifts. I start talking to my kids about their wish lists before Halloween, and by then, I know the weeks we have together will fly by before it's Christmas morning. I focus on the gifts my kids want most because I don't know what will be under their dad's tree.

When my kids are with their dad for Christmas morning, I've learned to focus on self-care to shield myself from sadness. I plan a morning of tenderness: dunking cookies in my fresh coffee, putting on a face mask, journaling, and making a phone call to my mom to hear her cheerful voice. I look at photos on my phone and reminisce about memories with my kids from the year before. I focus on my positive energy and the good ways that life has changed.

I remember my son adding the soccer ball ornament to the tree and my daughter adding the snowman she made in first grade. As my kids get older, to my delight, they still want to do the holiday traditions just the same. We are going to see the zoo lights again, and they are tilting the snow globes back and forth to make it snow, just like they did four years ago.

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• Holiday scams are rising. Phishing and smishing attacks are targeting online shoppers.
• Scammers exploit the busy holiday season, using fake delivery messages to steal data.
• Law enforcement also warns of porch pirates.

Law enforcement and security professionals are warning of increased scam activity this holiday season.

Most holiday scams are phishing scams that can be found year-round, though scammers will theme their fraud to fit the season. An example could be a fake social media ad for a holiday product that sends you to a scam website or an email saying that a package you ordered for a Christmas gift is delayed and needs your approval.

"Remember, don't click on anything unknown, even if you just ordered gifts and you're expecting packages to come to your door soon," IRS Commissioner Danny Werfel said in a release. "Double-check before you click."

One of the most popular frauds this holiday season is a "smishing" scam involving text messages from people who claim to be the United States Postal Service, Melanie McGovern, the director of public relations at the Better Business Bureau, told Business Insider. The text message might say a package you ordered is delayed and include a link to a fake website that the scammers use to steal personal information.

"The biggest thing for people to remember is if they have opted into text reminders," McGovern said. "You have to opt in to receive any kind of text message from a retailer. Keeping track of what you ordered and where, how it's being delivered, is really important."

Scammers target the holiday season because it's a time when people are "super busy" buying gifts for loved ones, McGovern said. It can be easy to fall for a phishing scam during this time of the year, McGovern said, because of the commotion around holiday shopping.

"They're panicking, you know," McGovern said. "We're a week from Christmas, and they're like, 'Oh no, my package is being held up. It's something for my child. You're naturally going to go into panic mode."

One method to spot a phishing scam is to look at where the text or email is coming from, McGovern said. The USPS says it only uses "5-digit short codes" to send and receive text messages to and from mobile phones. One example of a fake scam text claiming to be from the USPS reviewed by Business Insider shows a +63 area code, which originates in the Philippines.

"They're phishing," McGovern said. "I got one the other day for my health insurance, and it looked like it was coming from your health insurance, until I looked at the address and realized it."

The most important thing to do if you think you are being scammed is to stop, pause, and look for warning signs, McGovern said. If you feel like something is off, there's a chance that it probably is.

Law enforcement agencies have also reported a rise in "porch pirate" activity, where thieves will steal a package delivered to someone's front porch. North Carolina Attorney General John Stein said in a holiday scam warning that it's important to track packages and make sure that you are home when they are delivered.

You can also set the delivery address to a neighbor's house who is home during the day, send the package to your workplace, or ask the post office to hold your mail and collect the deliveries there, Stein said.

• Deloitte UK has had a year of reorganization and cost-cutting amid a consulting slowdown.
• It is planning to cut staff travel and expenses by 50% for the rest of the financial year, the FT reported.
• The cuts to spending were short-term, a senior exec said in internal messaging.

The Big Four consulting firm Deloitte wants to cut its spending on staff travel and expenses by more than 50% in the UK, where it is headquartered.

In an email sent to partners and directors in October, Deloitte said the "firmwide cost management measures" were being introduced because of "challenging market conditions" in the UK, the Financial Times reported.

Deloitte reportedly said it was only aiming to maintain the cost cuts until the end of its current financial year in May and described the reduction in spending as "limited" and "temporary."

The email was sent by Sarah Humphreys, chief operating officer of the tax and legal division. Humphreys said Deloitte was also reviewing its "recruitment agency costs, licence fees, bad debts and global recharges," the FT reported.

The cost-saving efforts come after a year of reorganization and redundancies at Deloitte, as the firm grapples with an industry-wide slowdown in demand for consulting services that has hit revenue growth.

Deloitte's global consulting revenues grew by 1.9% in the 2024 financial year ending 31 May. The previous year, they grew by 19.1%.

"Like many organisations, we are looking carefully at our costs to ensure we're able to meet clients' needs while continuing to make investments in our firm and our people," Deloitte said in a statement shared with Business Insider Monday.

The downturn comes after many consultancies hired aggressively during the pandemic.

In March, Deloitte carried out a global overhaul of its operations aimed at cutting costs and repositioning it for future success. It simplified its core offering from five to four categories: audit and assurance, tax and legal strategy, risk and transactions, and technology and transformation.

It has also held several rounds of layoffs in the UK, where it has around 25,000 employees. In internal messages seen by Business Insider, Deloitte said layoffs of around 180 staff in September were "necessary to enable us to navigate the remainder of a challenging FY25."

The firm has also cut UK partner's pay to save on costs, leaving the most senior class of employees with roughly £50,000 ($63,000) less than the previous year — a 4.5% decline. UK partners still took home an average of around £1 million ($1.2 million) for the fourth year running.

Do you work at Deloitte? Contact this reporter in confidence to share your thoughts on the industry at [email protected]

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