• My husband and I have opposite organizational styles.
• I learned the hard way that pressuring him to change wouldn't work.
• A home remodel forced us to face the clutter, and now, we communicate much better.

I consider myself a pseudo-minimalist. I don't buy knickknacks when traveling, fill my home with extra furniture, or stock up on pantry, beauty, or toiletry supplies. I like having dresser drawers that close easily and bookshelves I can pull a novel from without four others toppling onto my head.

Now imagine the opposite of my personality in the clutter department, and you have my husband.

He's a collector. He's a saver of the socks I would throw out because they're starting to get a small hole, of the hockey gear that goes unused, of extra dinnerware we don't have room for.

So what are these two personalities doing living under one roof? Well, we love each other. And people do crazy things for love.

The difference between how we dealt with clutter took a toll

When we married and moved in together, the problem revealed itself in full. We had very different ways of organizing and even thinking about the items we bring — and keep — in our home.

I felt suffocated and panicked at the stacks, bags, and boxes of his things.

My attempts to purge items didn't go well. I didn't know how to be kind in my panic, and he didn't want things to change.

Living with so much clutter affected my mental health. I felt the pressure of organizing so many things. It seemed impossible to make stuffed spaces look nice. Rooms felt cramped, every storage area overflowed, and our fights over the subject became caustic.

I knew it was time for a different approach. He had emotional attachments to things that I didn't understand, but it didn't mean I was right in demanding that they go.

Health and wellness consultant Michelle Porter told Business Insider, "Studies show that cluttered spaces elevate cortisol levels, the body's stress hormone. For all household members, this can mean heightened irritability, difficulty focusing, and a reduced ability to relax." In short, our stuff affects our health, and I needed to reduce our load.

Biopsychologist Mary Poffenroth explains why organizing shared spaces can be so difficult. "What one partner thinks is necessary organization, the other partner may see as a threat to their emotional safety and well-being."

A remodel meant it was time for a new approach

During our recent kitchen remodel, I saw that even with the additional space provided by the new cabinetry, it still wasn't enough for all the appliances and dishes he owned. I suggested we only keep what would fit into the new space. To my surprise and delight, he agreed. This made the getting-rid-of-things talks that followed easier because we'd both consented beforehand.

At the end of the remodel, we donated several boxes.

I felt empowered. High on the win, we implemented this same tactic in other areas by creating a "one in, one out" rule. If a new shirt comes into the house, he donates one. The same goes for other clothing items. And now, when he wants to buy a new appliance, he considers first if we have a space for it.

We now have a new way of talking about clutter

For items going unused, it takes a little more patience. I'll bring up the item I'd like to discuss and the fact that it seems we don't really need it. I use the word "seem" specifically so he can correct me if he is using it and I'm wrong. He usually replies with how he's hoping to use the item soon and we agree to a timeline. Then, if it's not used at least an agreed-upon number of times over the next year, we'll sell or donate it.

Nowadays, our space is much more comfortable for me than when we first married. Decluttering our space will be an ongoing process as life and needs change, but we've learned how to talk through the "stuff" in a way that works for us both, and that's the real success story.

• A small house can feel cluttered easily with my big family.
• That's why it's important to follow a decluttering routine, including a nightly family clean-up.
• We also do seasonal closet purges and keep surfaces clear to avoid visual clutter.

My spouse and I have three children, ages 1, 7, and 12. With a family of five, our mid-century house often feels cramped and cluttered. But the prices of homes are astronomical where we live, and I refuse to take on a higher mortgage.

Over the years, I've noticed the more closely I follow a decluttering regimen, our home feels roomier and more presentable. Although I don't have a natural gift for organizing, following these simple steps keeps our house from becoming an untidy wasteland.

We're constantly going through what we own

The first decluttering rule I follow is to donate or toss items regularly. Ideally, once a month, I comb through my children's rooms looking for broken or unused toys, miscellaneous cheap party favors, and trinkets.

I then designate a box for a local thrift shop and throw out the rest. Typically, I ask my children's permission first, but sometimes, if things are out of control, I remove toys and ask for forgiveness later. Mostly, my children never even notice the missing objects.

Reorganizing spaces can help give a different perspective

Sometimes, the most straightforward step to decluttering is reorganizing a space that has received too much love lately.

One such place that often needs attention is our craft closet. Even 15-20 minutes of reorganizing craft supplies rejuvenates and tidies this space.

Commit to seasonal closet purges

Each new season presents an opportunity to sort through my children's clothes and eliminate what no longer fits them.

Once I've made a pile, I separate it into three bins: what I can consign at local shops, donate to other families, or turn into rags for outdoor cleaning or chores.

This allows me to keep the appropriate-size clothing in my children's closets and feel good that their discards stay out of landfills. The same method can be implemented with toys or adult closets, too.

Tidying up as a family each night helps keep common-use spaces tidy

When children don't know how to take initiative for their things, the responsibility of cleaning is solely on the caretakers.

This ritual can use a little structure and focus, so last year, I started setting a timer for 15 minutes each night and asked my two older children to use their eyes to look for things out of place and put them away. Sometimes, I assign them certain spaces to clean, such as the kitchen counter, living room rug, or entryway.

One of the most important rules is that they help pick up others' things, not just their own, because we are a family, and it's our job to care for one another. With practice, they've gotten more helpful.

Get rid of something whenever you buy something new

Try what we call "the Amazon box trick." Consider trading out something else whenever you buy something new for your family. This is the mindset: something comes in, something goes out.

I've heard some people do this with every Amazon box arriving at their doorstep, hence the name.

I talked to a few organizing pros for extra tips

While my organizing routine has worked well for my family over the last decade, I always want to make the process easier. I chatted with a few organizing experts to find additional decluttering tips to incorporate into my regimen.

Assign everyone their own laundry day

Matt Paxton, a featured cleaner on "Hoarders" for 15 seasons, shared a few of his key decluttering strategies.

Paxton, who is also the author of "Keep the Memories, Lose the Stuff: Declutter, Downsize, and Move Forward with Your Life," has a big family, too. He said, "We stop doing our kids' laundry at age 12, and they are each assigned a day." He believes kids need to learn how to do their own laundry and told Business Insider that having a scheduled day eliminates traffic in the laundry room.

Use storage to clear off cluttered surfaces

"Tinier spaces are apt to feel cluttered if tabletop surfaces are filled with papers, dishes, magazines, electronic gear, etc.," Barbara Brock, founder of Barbara Brock Inc., a professional organizing and staging company based in New York City, said. She explained having too many items left out can be visually distracting.

For example, my kitchen island is often the dumping ground for miscellaneous things. When it's cleaned off, our whole house feels fresher. Brock suggested using drawers, cubbies, and under-the-bed storage to find a place for everything. This will help achieve a tidier, more streamlined feel.

And don't overlook your walls. Vertical shelves hung on the wall have untapped storage potential, Brock said. They can hold cubbies that otherwise consume floor space and help create not only a place to stow things like toys, shoes, and backpacks but also a sense of visual order in the home.

Although I don't have the "organizing gene," it's possible to thrive in small spaces with practice if we set aside time regularly to declutter and clean following these tips.

• Excessive holiday shopping can clutter your home, stoke anxiety, and worsen your debt.
• Minimalist author Joshua Becker recommends breaking the mindset of "more is better."
• Sustainability is key when it comes to decorations and gifts.

When I was a kid, my father didn't want a Christmas tree. As a minimalist, he didn't enjoy dragging it into the house only to throw it out a few weeks later. But my mother insisted, in order to create some magic for us kids. So every year, we went to the woods behind our house in Texas, cut down a cedar tree, carried it inside, and decorated it with family-heirloom ornaments and a string of chili pepper lights.

I now have a husband, two kids, and my own minimalist tendencies. I'm wary of Black Friday and other holiday sales that push a mountain of decorations, home goods, outfits, and presents. There's pressure, online and IRL, to throw lavish parties and fulfill everyone's wish list.

All that stuff can clutter our homes, reducing our usable living space and making us anxious. And it's expensive.

More than a third of Americans went into debt during the 2023 holiday season, a survey by LendingTree found. Of those, 65% said that going into debt wasn't in their plans. On top of that, we spend money on containers, storage units, and even larger homes to hold our multiplying possessions.

"We fall into this trap of thinking that more is better," Joshua Becker, the author of the popular blog Becoming Minimalist, said. "Parents just run themselves ragged, stressed, and tired, and they don't have to."

Adopting some minimalist ideas can help you ward off holiday clutter and stress before they start to pile up. Minimalism can be loosely defined as the pursuit of simplicity, which looks different for everyone. Here are some tips to get you started.

Make your decorations smaller and sustainable

Decorations can be a stressful part of the holiday season, Becker said, so less is more. They're burdensome to put up, time-consuming to take down and store properly, and expensive to buy and replace.

Many garages are bursting with large plastic decorations. They spend the year accumulating dust, stains, and holes, and often need to be thrown out. Instead of buying a new herd of inflatable reindeer, get (or make) a real wreath that can be composted or turned into mulch when the holiday is over.

Go old-school and make garlands from popcorn, cranberries, dried oranges, or candy canes. It'll turn decorating into a fun event you an do with your loved ones and remove the need to find space for storage.

Skip the new matching outfits

Many families fall into a pattern of buying new sets of matching clothes every year, including pajamas, costumes, party outfits, and "ugly sweaters." These clothes have holiday-specific patterns, so they're often worn just once, then forgotten or outgrown.

Instead of buying more, look for small matching accessories you already own — hopefully, ones that won't be outgrown, like antlers or jingle-bell necklaces. The simplicity of these accessories may make things easier if your kids drag their feet when it's time to dress up for the party or the family photo.

Don't upgrade your kitchen and dining accessories

When hosting a big party, you might be tempted to buy new kitchen tools, glasses, flatware, coasters, and other items to charm your guests. But you probably don't need them, and no one will remember that you had matching napkin rings or the new KitchenAid mixer with the wooden bowl. They'll remember having fun with one another. And besides, the "perfectly set table" will only look perfect until someone spills milk all over it.

Reimagine your gifts

Many families love to see boxes piled under the Christmas tree, but you might be just as happy with fewer objects and more experiences. "In a culture where excess is praised, and excess is championed and encouraged, there are very few people posting a photo of a Christmas tree with only an envelope underneath it," Becker said. But that doesn't mean you should let what we see on social media dictate how you spend your holidays.

Becker has four guidelines to keep your gifts from needlessly piling up: quality over quantity, needs over wants, experiences over possessions, and consumables over non-consumables. Personally, I enjoy giving a night in a hotel or a ticket to a show.

Ask your loved ones for help

Be open about your desire to reduce your clutter, and tell your loved ones that you need their help. This can be difficult when grandparents and other relatives want to spoil the little ones, but the conversation can be very productive, especially if you have it earlier in the season.

"Don't just say, 'We want experiences rather than physical gifts.' Give a nice long list of what some of those experiences might be," Becker said. And be patient; understand they may not fully grasp or understand what you mean the first year.

Focus on next year's wealth

Think about the money you'll spend on objects and storage "solutions" for your gifts and decorations. Commit to spending less, then use the difference for something you really need in the new year. Or use that money to create more money. Let it appreciate in a retirement, brokerage, or 529 college savings account.

• I've moved multiple times over the past five years, including two international moves.
• I've learned a lot about decluttering and letting go of material things during this time.
• Now, my husband and I live a minimalist lifestyle.

There's nothing like a move to prompt a thorough decluttering session. An international move makes the mission even more pressing. Over the past five years, as I moved from Canada to the UK and back again, I've absolutely mastered the art of decluttering.

My first move was fairly easy. I'd been living in a shared rental with roommates, so I only needed to pack up my room. Still, before leaving, I remember weekly donation trips to thrift stores and endless posts to Facebook Marketplace trying to sell or give away what I couldn't take. After weeks of decluttering, I managed to condense my belongings into a single suitcase and carry-on.

My husband and I accumulated a lot of stuff together

The second time was much harder. I moved to the UK for love, and while there, I started building a home with my husband. Like any new couple moving into their first place, we had fun making it our own. I became obsessed with the clothing and decor stores that weren't available in Canada.

Over four years, our one-bedroom apartment became filled with cute vases, plant pots, decorative plates, funny mugs, fitness equipment, novelty games, and books that we never got around to reading. Our storage closet was a mini danger zone with its haphazard stacks of boxes and containers — think Monica Geller's closet of shame in "Friends."

An international move forced us to pare down yet again

In 2022, my husband and I decided to return to Canada for a calmer pace of life and easier access to nature. We'd been living in the bustling post-industrial Birmingham, where he was from, while I was from the more relaxed, coastal city of Vancouver. We gave ourselves just under a year to plan the move and pack up our lives again.

Remembering how long it took me to declutter and pack before moving the first time around, I began the process five months before our official move. I had grown attached to many of my new belongings, but I had to be honest with myself about their practicality. There's only so much you can fit into a suitcase.

I started with my wardrobe, purging impulse purchases and seldom-worn items. I was left with a streamlined capsule wardrobe that's still serving me well a year and a half after my return to Canada; it all fit into a carry-on and a checked bag, much like what I brought with me when I first arrived in the UK.

The home goods were harder to deal with. I didn't want to let go of everything because starting from scratch is expensive. I had to get rid of the bigger pieces, like plant pots, and generic items like dinnerware.

We shipped over a box with a handful of decor pieces we really liked (along with our winter coats), but otherwise, all we had with us was two checked pieces of luggage and our carry-ons when we got to the airport. However, I'm embarrassed to say we didn't manage to get rid of everything; our landlords messaged us to let us know we had left behind a few trinkets in the cupboards.

Our move made me realize just how easy it is to accumulate things you don't really need. Since we've been back in Canada, we've adopted a minimalist lifestyle and have been very selective with what enters our home. And we've never felt more at peace.

We're in another one-bedroom apartment, but now, we're without a storage closet to dump our clutter into. Although we're not planning on moving abroad again, I live with the mindset that I might at any given time — how easily would I be able to pack up my life again if I needed to? With our current streamlined wardrobes and practical selection of home goods, I'd like to think we wouldn't need another six months to declutter if the occasion arises again.

• We live in Asheville, and after Hurricane Helene, my kids wanted to donate toys.
• I taught them how to declutter using the KonMari method.
• They were so excited to give their once-loved toys to other kids.

In 2019, I binge-watched the Netflix series "Tidying Up with Marie Kondo." Back then, I was going through a difficult time in my life: my husband and I were trying to conceive while also dealing with my parents' tempestuous divorce. After watching the episode "Making Room for a Baby," I desperately wanted to "clean up my life," both metaphorically and physically. And so, I set out to declutter our tiny 500-square-foot apartment in Sunnyside, Queens, to manifest a positive pregnancy test.

Instead of twiddling my fingers and wallowing in self-pity, I began to do the work until every nook and cranny was purged, cleaned, and organized. I even purchased various storage containers and new furniture to solve the embarrassing problem areas of our home.

When I finished, I relished my work. The labor of tossing out items that no longer "sparked joy" unironically did just that: sparked joy and gave me a renewed sense of hope for the future.

Years after my cathartic experience with decluttering, Hurricane Helene hit

Five years later, my husband and I have a 2- and a 4-year-old, and we live in Asheville, North Carolina, a small mountain city that recently experienced a devastating blow from Hurricane Helene. To help our daughters better understand the scope of the damage, we drove through the decimated areas of town.

They saw with their own eyes how the Swannanoa and French Broad rivers wiped out numerous homes, businesses, and parks. As we surveyed the wreckage, we mourned the places that no longer existed, places that our family frequented and cherished.

By the end of our surveillance, our family had brainstormed ways to serve our community, like supporting local businesses and donating items we no longer used. The experience was simultaneously heartbreaking and heartwarming.

I talked with my daughters about how their unused items could help others

Since my daughters were most excited about the idea of going through their own things and passing them along to children in need, we got to work as soon as we returned home. One thing is for certain, though: getting rid of stuff is hard, and at first, my daughters had a difficult time emotionally with the task of decluttering. I recognized immediately that I needed to rely on a simple guide or principle to help my daughters understand the "how" and "why" behind our purging.

Enter the KonMari Method.

I explained the basic idea: We would go through each individual item one by one and ask ourselves if it sparked joy. If it didn't, it would go into the donation box. If it did, we would designate a home for the item in the room so that we would know where it lived during future clean-up sessions.

After a few practices, my oldest child really got the assignment, and her little sister quickly followed suit. When they found their groove, I decided to exit their bedroom, partially to give them space and so I could prepare dinner and resist the urge to interfere with their choices.

When I returned to check in, my daughters had gone through every single stuffed animal in the room and had filled one large garbage bag. I was stunned that my kids were able to complete the difficult task with very few tears.

Together, we thanked the stuffed animals that once sparked joy and told them it was their time to do the same for someone else — someone who could use a little more joy in their life after the storm.

I was so proud of them for letting go of their once-loved things

As I carried out the bag of stuffies, I told my kids how proud I was and that they should be proud of themselves, too. They were able to let go of things that were once special to them to brighten someone else's day.

"How amazing is that?" I asked tearfully as I dropped to my knees and embraced my two little ones. I marveled at the beauty of these tiny human beings while also grieving all that our neighbors had lost.

Within seconds, my oldest enthusiastically shouted, "Let's keep going, Mom!"

Yes, I thought, let's keep going. Let's keep going despite the devastation. Let's keep going despite our grief and sorrow. Let's keep going because there is more to this world than our physical possessions. Let's keep going because we must — for one another's sake.