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Today β€” 10 January 2025News

7 things to stream this weekend, from the return of 'The Traitors' to Netflix's bloody new Western drama

10 January 2025 at 16:59
Alan Cumming in The Traitors
Β 

Euan Cherry/Peacock; Natalie Ammari/BI

  • Shows like "Goosebumps" and "The Traitors" returned this week.
  • New series like "American Primeval" and "The Pitt" also premiered.
  • A Jerry Springer docuseries and the final episodes of "The Curious Case of Natalia Grace" are out too.

This weekend, you can watch a bloody Western drama, a deep dive into "The Jerry Springer Show," or a reality competition where pseudo-celebrities compete for money in a Scottish castle.

Here's a complete rundown of all the best movies, shows, and documentaries to stream this weekend, broken down by what kind of entertainment you're looking for.

For a new historical drama, check out "American Primeval."
Taylor Kitsch and Betty Gilpin in "American Primeval"
Taylor Kitsch and Betty Gilpin star in "American Primeval."

Netflix

If you like Westerns and can handle gore (this one is several levels of violent above "Yellowstone"), "American Primeval" is a great pick. Taylor Kitsch stars as a traumatized, rugged frontiersman, and Betty Gilpin plays a mother searching for a new life with her son out west.

Streaming on: Netflix

Reality fans, rejoice: "The Traitors" is back.
cast of The Traitors season 3 including Gabby Windey
Former "Bachelorette" Gabby Windey is part of "The Traitors" cast.

Euan Cherry/Peacock

The Emmy-winning competition series returned this week, with Britney Spears' ex-husband, Zac Efron's brother, and a former "Bachelorette" star among the new cast of "The Traitors" season three. And, of course, Alan Cumming and his fabulous outfits return to host.

Streaming on: Peacock

"Goosebumps" returns too, which is good news for horror lovers.
David Schwimmer and Ana Ortiz in "Goosebumps: The Vanishing"
David Schwimmer joins the cast of "Goosebumps" in season two.

Francisco Roman/Disney

The first season, a new adaptation of the beloved children's horror book series, was a surprise hit, with Justin Long as the lead. "Friends" star David Schwimmer takes over as the main adult for the show's second outing, subtitled "The Vanishing."

Unlike the 1995 "Goosebumps" show, which adapted individual books from the series in an episodic anthology format, the new one tells a cohesive story each season (though they're of course inspired by the original books). "The Vanishing" centers on twins who are sent to live with their divorced dad (Schwimmer) in Brooklyn for a summer and finds themselves entangled in the decades-old mystery of four teens who vanished in 1994.

Streaming on: Disney+ and Hulu

"The Pitt" is a new medical drama, with a twist.
Ned Brower, Patrick Ball, Noah Wyle, Tracy Ifeachor in "The Pitt" season 1
Noah Wyle returns to the medical drama genre in "The Pitt."

Warrick Page/Max

There's no shortage of medical dramas on cable TV networks, but "The Pitt" is a standout for its hyperrealism. Starring "ER" alum Noah Wyle, this show takes the "24" approach, with each episode playing out in real time and the entire season representing a single 15-hour shift in an emergency room.

Streaming on: Max

Natalia Grace's wild saga finally concluded this week.
natalia grace sitting on her bed with mackenzie depaul and two dogs, while nicole depaul stands with crutches at the foot of the bed. the three women are smiling and speaking casually
Natalia Grace with Mackenzie and Nicole DePaul.

Investigation Discovery

Natalia Grace Mans' story has captivated the public for years.

The Ukrainian orphan with dwarfism was adopted by American parents, who later accused her of being an adult posing as a child. Claiming she was a danger to their family, Kristine and Michael Barnett moved away to Canada, having Natalia legally re-aged and leaving her in an apartment on her own.

Natalia ultimately ended up living with Cynthia and Antwon Mans, but that wasn't the happy ending it initially appeared to be. "The Final Chapter," released this week, promises to bring a conclusion to the story, including updates about Natalia's boyfriend and the new family she's living with now.

Streaming on: Max

For another nonfiction pick, watch "Look Into My Eyes."
A man with his eyes closed holding out his hands in a still from "Look Into My Eyes"
A psychic in "Look Into My Eyes."

A24

This 2024 documentary, which initially premiered at Sundance, follows of group of New York City professional psychics. It's a surprisingly touching look into what these people do; the National Board of Review named it one of the five best documentaries of the year.

Streaming on: Max

There's also a docuseries exploring "The Jerry Springer" show.
Guests fighting on "The Jerry Springer Show."
Guests fighting on "The Jerry Springer Show."

Virginia Sherwood/NBCUniversal via Getty Images

"Jerry Springer: Fights, Camera, Action" chronicles the rise of the controversial daytime TV show, which became a megahit in the 1990s with its sordid (and often violent) drama.

The docuseries features the show's producers recalling how they manipulated the guests (who were real people, not paid actors) behind the scenes for maximum on-air drama.

Streaming on: Netflix

Read the original article on Business Insider

A timeline of Donald Trump and UFC CEO Dana White's relationship

Donald Trump looks on as Dana White speaks
President-elect Donald Trump's decadeslong friendship with UFC President Dana White has been mutually beneficial to both men.

Alex Brandon/AP

  • Donald Trump and Dana White have enjoyed a decadeslong friendship predating presidential politics.
  • In each of Trump's three presidential campaigns, White lined up behind the president-elect.
  • During the 2024 race, the mixed martial arts leader also appeared on Trump's first TikTok video.

Donald Trump might be the only person who can attend an Ultimate Fighting Championship fight and outshine the headliners β€” even UFC CEO Dana White doesn't draw the same type of reaction.

In November, Trump set the crowd off by walking into UFC 309 at Madison Square Garden to join his entourage, which included Elon Musk, House Speaker Mike Johnson, and Trump's cabinet nominees.

White stands at the center of it all. In just under three decades, White has turned his sport, once on the fringe of pop culture, into a spectacle that even a president-elect couldn't resist.

Trump and White's decades-long friendship has been mutually beneficial. White has repeatedly said he will never forget how Trump offered a grand stage to his sport when few others would. Trump successfully deployed White's cohort of podcasters and influencers, led by Joe Rogan, in his 2024 election win.

"Nobody deserves this more than him, and nobody deserves this more than his family does," White told the energetic crowd at Mar-a-Lago as it was apparent that Trump had been elected to a second term. "This is what happens when the machine comes after you."

Here's a look at the decadeslong relationship between Trump and White over the years:

Donald Trump gave a big early boost to UFC
Donald Trump poses on the floor during the opening of his Trump Taj Mahal casino
Donald Trump poses on the floor during the opening of his Trump Taj Mahal casino

Getty

In 1990, Trump opened Trump Taj Mahal, a billion-dollar prized jewel in Atlantic City, that businessman billed as the 8th Wonder of the World. At its peak, it was the biggest casino in town.

Trump needed big acts to fill the casino's arena, which Elton John had christened. In 2001, Trump took a chance on the UFC, which was still trying to escape its brutalist stigma. The sport that then-Sen. John McCain, famously called "human cockfighting" in the 1990s, couldn't even put on an event in Las Vegas.

Trump's UFC event came at a pivotal moment
Randy Couture is victorious over Pedro Rizzo at UFC 31
Randy Couture is victorious over Pedro Rizzo at UFC 31

Susumu Nagao/Zuffa LLC/Zuffa LLC via Getty Images

Shut out of Nevada, UFC staged its fights in a series of smaller venues around the country and the world. White considered the invitation to the Taj Mahal a sign of legitimacy.

"Nobody took us seriously," White has repeatedly said. "Except Donald Trump."

Trump's backing came during a crucial time in the company's history. In January 2001, a month before the Trump-hosted fight, casino moguls Lorenzo and Frank Fertitta purchased UFC. They picked White, Lorenzo's friend and a manager for two of mixed martial arts' biggest fighters, as the president.

Under White's leadership, UFC's popularity skyrocketed
Dana White looks forward during a 2007 weigh-in ceremony
Dana White looks forward during a 2007 weigh-in ceremony.

Jae C. Hong/AP

By September 2001, UFC was in Vegas. Four years later, White led UFC onto the airwaves on SpikeTV, cashing in the popularity of reality TV competitions with "The Ultimate Fighter."

It helped that in 2004, Trump welcomed Tito Ortiz, one of the sport's biggest stars, onto the first season of NBC's "Celebrity Apprentice," the glitzier spin-off to Trump's smash reality TV hit.

The Ultimate Fighter was a big success, increasing the company's popularity.

White locked in UFC's voice
Dana White hangs out with Joe Rogan ahead of SpikeTV's 2006 video game awards
Dana White hangs out with Joe Rogan ahead of SpikeTV's 2006 video game awards.

Alberto E. Rodriguez/WireImage via Getty

If White is the face of UFC, Rogan is undoubtedly its voice. His association with the company even predates White's time as president. After the Fertitta brothers purchased UFC in 2001, White offered Rogan a full-time gig as a color commentator. Rogan has said it's in his contract that he'll leave the UFC if White ever exits, too.

Rogan's profile grew alongside the UFC, considering his association with mixed martial arts was part of why he became the host of NBC's "Fear Factor."

The comedian cashed in on his bigger profile in 2009, starting what was then a weekly commentary show. By the time Trump first ran for president in 2016, "The Joe Rogan Experience" was one of the most popular podcasts in the world.

Business didn't get in the way of Trump and White's friendship.
Donald Trump briefly tried to back his own competitor to the UFC
Donald Trump briefly tried to back his competitor to the UFC

Brad Barket/Getty Images

While he's known for real-estate, Trump has sought out many other partnerships and business ventures to varying degrees of success. In 2008, Trump partnered with Affliction, a clothing brand, to launch a competitor in the mixed-martial arts space. Their promotion even landed Russian fighter Fedor Emelianenko, whom White and the UFC had previously sought to sign.

The venture lasted only two fights. According to The New York Times, White sometimes criticized his friend, pointing out his inexperience in operating such a company, "Donald Trump owns casinos."

White and Trump remained close. The UFC head even vowed that he would never fully go after Trump, a nod to the real estate mogul's early support.

White was once far from a conservative firebrand
Dana White and Harry Reid vote early during the 2010 midterm elections
Dana White and Harry Reid voted early during the 2010 midterm elections.

Steve Marcus/Las Vegas Sun/Reuters

In 2010, White campaigned with Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid of Nevada as he sought to hang onto his seat amid a difficult year for Democrats. Reid won, and Democrats held onto a slimmer US Senate majority.

According to The Times, White's politics mirrored Trump's in that both businessmen viewed the enterprise through a transactional lens. Trump faced criticism in the 2016 GOP primaries for previously supporting leading Democrats like Hillary Clinton.

White spoke as if he was a stranger at the 2016 Republican National Convention.
Dana White speaks at the RNC in Cleveland in 2016.
White has been in Trump's political orbit since his first foray into presidential politics.

Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images

Few major establishment Republicans spoke at Trump's 2016 convention. Enter White, one of a handful of longtime Trump friends who extolled the virtues of the man who would soon become the Republican Party's presidential nominee.

White even alluded to the fact that his attendance might appear odd.

"My name is Dana White. I am the president of the Ultimate Fighting Championship. I'm sure most you are wondering, 'What are you doing here?'" White told the crowd in Cleveland. "I am not a politician. I am a fight promoter, but I was blown away and honored to be invited here tonight, and I wanted to show up and tell you about my friend, Donald Trump β€” the Donald Trump that I know."

White returned to the trail again in 2020.
Dana White
White stumped for Trump during a February 2020 campaign rally in Colorado Springs, Colorado.

JIM WATSON/AFP via Getty Images

Ahead of Trump's reelection bid, White said Trump's time in the White House only deepened their relationship.

"We've actually become even closer since he's become the President of the United States," White said during a 2020 campaign rally. "When somebody becomes the President of the United States, you don't ever expect to hear from them again. And I understand it. It absolutely makes sense. This guy is so loyal and such a good friend."

The COVID-19 pandemic made White a conservative star
UFC 249 was held in Jacksonville, Florida during the COVID-19 pandemic
UFC 249 was held in Jacksonville, Florida, during the COVID-19 pandemic

Douglas P. DeFelice/Getty Image

The COVID-19 pandemic devastated the live event business. Sports, including the UFC, were no exception. White saw an opening as the four major professional leagues struggled through discussions on how to return.

White tried to get the UFC to return with an event on tribal land in California, but that effort was postponed amid Disney and ESPN's uneasiness. In turning to Gov. Ron DeSantis' Florida, White found a much more receptive audience β€” even if the first fight didn't allow any fans. UFC 249 in May was the first major sporting event since the pandemic's beginning.

Trump delivered a video message congratulating White on the event.

"Get the sports leagues back, let's play," Trump said in a video recorded outside of the Oval Office. "Do the social distancing, and whatever you have to do, but we need sports. We want our sports back."

Out of power, Trump found refuge at the UFC
Donald Trump watches a UFC fight in July 2021
Former President Donald Trump made a rare public appearance at a July 2021 UFC fight.

Stacy Revere/Getty Images

After leaving the White House, Donald Trump wasn't welcomed in many places. Following the January 6 Capitol riot, the two biggest professional golf governing bodies rebuked him. The Professional Golf Association even stripped one Trump-owned course of the right to host one of the PGA's major four tournaments.

In July 2021, the Manhattan District Attorney indicted the Trump Organization, setting off an array of legal headaches that didn't abate until after the 2024 election. A week later, Trump entered to mostly cheers in Las Vegas as he prepared to take in UFC 264.

Trump made the UFC central to his 2024 bid

Trump officially launched on TikTok at UFC 302 in June 2024. The fighting promotion's audience was also the perfect place for the former president's campaign, given his advisors' emphasis on attracting young men.

White's broader orbit suddenly intertwined with the former president's comeback campaign. Trump, and later his running mate, Sen. JD Vance of Ohio, made a point of appearing on podcasts geared toward this demographic. The Nelk Boys, Theo Von, Adin Ross, and "Bussin' with the Boys" all shared close ties to White. Trump appeared on each of their respective shows.

White spoke at Trump's pre-election rally at Madison Square Garden.
Dana White
White was a high-profile speaker at Trump's October rally at Madison Square Garden.

Anna Moneymaker/Getty Images

White energized the crowd at Trump's Madison Square Garden rally just days before the election, where he said that Vice President Kamala Harris wouldn't bring "change" to the country.

And he emphatically praised Trump in advance of an election that was seemingly tied in most of the swing states.

"He is the most resilient, hardest-working human being that I've ever met in my entire life," White said during his remarks.

Celebrating his win, Trump turned the mic over to White
Dana White speaks at Trump's election night event.
UFC CEO Dana White was a prominent presence during President-elect Donald Trump's 2024 victory speech.

Brendan Gutenschwager/Anadolu via Getty Images

Dana White just thanked

Adin Ross, Theo Von, Nelkboys and Joe Rogan for the Trump victory #Election2024 pic.twitter.com/GYye6c9onc

β€” FADE (@FadeAwayMedia) November 6, 2024

As Trump spoke to an adoring crowd at Mar-a-Lago and to the nation, he invited White to make remarks, and the UFC president wasted no time singing the praises of the president-elect.

"He keeps going forward β€” he doesn't quit," White bluntly said. "He deserves this. They deserve it as a family."

White also name-checked podcast hosts that had welcomed Trump into the so-called "Manosphere."

A former UFC spokesperson will have a key role in Trump's White House
Steven Cheung follows Donald Trump as he board his plane
Steven Cheung follows Donald Trump as he boards his plane

Jabin Botsford/The Washington Post via Getty Images

One of Trump's key White House aides also has ties to UFC. Steven Cheung, who will be the White House communications director, was a spokesperson for UFC before he left to join Trump's 2016 campaign.

Cheung's brash statements, particularly those bashing DeSantis during the 2024 primary season, received considerable attention and drew comparisons to how closely they mirrored Trump's own rhetoric.

Just before Trump took office, Meta tapped White for a new role.
UFC president Dana White and Mark Zuckerberg at UFC 300 in April 13, 2024.
UFC President Dana White and Mark Zuckerberg attended UFC 300 on April 13.

Jeff Bottari/Zuffa LLC via Getty Images

Trump may have helped out White again. In January 2024, Meta CEO Mark Zuckerberg announced that the UFC executive would join the technology company's board. Zuckerberg's move was widely seen as a play to curry favor with Trump and his orbit.

White might be done in the political arena
UFC CEO Dana White and Donald Trump at the UFC 309 event in New York City.
After the election, Trump and White had a major outing together at the UFC 309 event in New York.

Chris Unger/Zuffa LLC

White wasn't very political before he campaigned for Trump. He has said that his outspokenness may be an exception only reserved for his friend.

"I'm never fucking doing this again," White recently told The New Yorker. "I want nothing to do with this shit. It's gross. It's disgusting. I want nothing to do with politics."

Read the original article on Business Insider

Tulsa Race Massacre: Barbaric but not prosecutable, DOJ finds

10 January 2025 at 16:04

The Justice Department in a report released Friday concluded "no avenue for prosecution exists" for the crimes carried out during the 1921 Tulsa Race Massacre, one of the deadliest series of murders in U.S. history.

The big picture: The findings come roughly three months after the DOJ launched its first-ever federal probe into the coordinated attack that left an estimated 300 Black residents dead and decimated the thriving Greenwood community, also known as "Black Wall Street."


  • The event is widely regarded as the worst race massacre in U.S. history.
  • The DOJ noted in its report β€” which corroborates survivor testimonies and existing research β€” that its conclusion was "despite the gravity of the department's findings." It was also the federal government's first comprehensive acknowledgment of the massacre.
  • The report confirms that the massacre was not just mob violence but a coordinated military-style attack that involved systematic arson, looting, and killings carried out by white residents, some of whom were deputized by the Tulsa police.

What they're saying: Assistant Attorney General Kristen Clarke of the Justice Department's Civil Rights Division called the massacre "a civil rights crime unique in its magnitude, barbarity, racist hostility and its utter annihilation of a thriving Black community."

  • "Until this day, the Justice Department has not spoken publicly about this race massacre or officially accounted for the horrific events that transpired in Tulsa," she said.
  • "This report breaks that silence by rigorous examination and a full accounting of one of the darkest episodes of our nation's past."

Zoom out: The DOJ report says prosecution is no longer feasible because the youngest potential defendants would now be over 115 years old and relevant statutes of limitations "expired decades ago," leaving no legal avenue for federal charges.

The DOJ report found:

  • Coordinated Attack: The DOJ found that β€” depending on how you define participation β€” up to 10,000 white residents of Tulsa devastated Greenwood.
  • Government Complicity: Local law enforcement disarmed Black residents, detained survivors in camps, and participated in arson and murder. Tulsa hindered recovery by imposing restrictive fire codes, rejecting aid, and resisting rebuilding efforts.
  • Legal Failures: The DOJ acknowledged that civil rights laws could have allowed hate crime prosecutions, but in 1921, no such protections existed and federal laws were unenforced, leaving survivors and descendants without justice.

Between the lines: While the report recognizes its historical significance and documents the trauma and loss suffered by Greenwood's residents, Rev. William Barber of the Repairers of the Breach expressed frustration at the limitations imposed by expired laws.

  • "Isn't it a tragedy that we have a statute of limitations on the murdering of an entire community?"
  • "If the Justice Department says the statute of limitations is a law, then there ought to be a campaign for new legislation that says, when the government has participated in political murder, this country will not allow a statute of limitation to prevent justice."

The bottom line: Barber stressed the need to reframe such events in historical narratives, because we "can't let these stories be told incorrectly."

  • "We must not use the language of 'riot.' Whether it was Springfield, Illinois; Wilmington, North Carolina; or Tulsaβ€”they weren't riots. They were murders, bombings, and insurrections."
  • "The Justice Department's findings must be built upon, and this moment must stir action, even if the results take time. Sometimes what you do in one moment has an impact in another."

More from Axios:

Here's how to stop an argument with a narcissist from spinning out of control

10 January 2025 at 15:24
A woman looking doubtful while embraced by a man
There are a few ways to respond to a narcissist during an argument.

Vladimir Godnik/Getty Images

  • Narcissists struggle to have positive feelings about someone whom they're mad at.
  • For many people, the best thing to do is to cut a narcissist out of their life.
  • If this isn't possible there are some tactics you can use to stop the argument from escalating.

Arguing with a narcissist can lead to hurt feelings or worse.Β 

Narcissists tend to be incapable of "object constancy," which means they struggle with having positive and negative feelings at the same time. Once they are fired up for a fight, they can only comprehend their feelings of resentment and anger.Β 

As a result, even the smalles argument can escalate quickly and fiercely. An issue you thought was unimportant or even irrelevant may blow up into a relationship-ending showdown.Β 

Narcissists can be very delicate, depending on what sub-type they are. They are often deeply insecure underneath their bravado, so they easily mistake other people's comments and actions for "attacks on themselves," Alena Scigliano, a psychotherapist and author of "Swimming with Sharks: Surviving Narcissist-Infested Waters," told Business Insider in 2023.Β 

Here's what you can expect from an argument with a narcissist and what you can do to keep things from spiraling out of control, according to experts.

Learn to look for the signs of an argument.
narcissist
You probably know the signs of when the narcissist in your life is going to start an argument.

Noel Hendrickson/ Getty Images

Scigliano said when you're familiar with the narcissist in your life, you'll learn their patterns. But some common signs a narcissist is gearing up for an argument include "physical agitation, facial expressions becoming sinister, darkened eyes, and a change in their posture to become more imposing or intimidating. Their voice may also suddenly get deeper or sterner, she said.

"Whatever the signs may be, they will reflect the narcissist's desire to regain control of the situation or reestablish their authority," Scigliano said.

Expect name-calling or the silent treatment.
A man and woman lying on opposite sides of the bed facing away from each other.
After an argument, a narcissist might ignore you for hours.

Maria Korneeva/ Getty Images

Fights with a narcissist are very different from regular relationship spats, Elinor Greenberg, a psychologist and author of "Borderline, Narcissistic, and Schizoid Adaptations: The Pursuit of Love, Admiration, and Safety," told BI in 2023.

Some of her clients have screamed at her over minor inconveniences, such as packages arriving during their session.

"If they're going to yell at me over the UPS man, you can see just how hard it is for them to have a relationship without getting nasty," she said.

When offended, narcissists may accuse their partner of being "disrespectful" or "selfish." The world revolves around them, in their eyes, so focusing on anything else feels like a direct attack.

Narcissistic rage ranges from direct confrontation with name-calling and insults to calculated, closed-down reactions like giving their partner the silent treatment for hours.

"They give you the cold shoulder, or they walk out and they find another partner," Greenberg said. "But it's all done silently and coolly and coldly β€” you know what you did.

Know you'll find yourself going in circles.
couple arguing
Arguing with a narcissist can be frustrating.

Tetra Images/Getty Images

Expect to feel frustrated with how the argument seems to be going nowhere.

"Because narcissists are fantastic at spinning others around in their webs of manipulation, you can easily become disoriented as to how the argument even began, frustrated over their circular arguments, and hopeless with regard to resolving anything," Scigliano said.Β 

"Oftentimes, people give up and give in just for the sake of ending the argument and reestablishing a modicum of peace," she said.Β 

Don't argue about "right" and "wrong."
a couple fighting
Don't try to win an argument with a narcissist.

Gorodenkoff/Shutterstock

There's no point trying to figure out who is "to blame" for something, as narcissists will never admit fault. They're also not necessarily trying to "win" the argument.Β 

"Be aware that narcissists don't argue to prove a point," divorce attorney Derek Jacques of The Mitten Law Firm told BI in 2023. "They argue to feel a rush of satisfaction of putting you down and belittling you."Β 

Instead, try to empathize with their feelings.
A couple hugging on a dark street
Empathy might help calm a narcissist during an argument.

Dima Berlin/Getty Images

Some therapists debate whether narcissists mean to cause harm to their loved ones. Regardless of their intent, their attacks can still wound those around them.Β 

Narcissists become "visibly disappointed, frustrated, angry, and at times, violent when they don't receive the feedback, praise, and admiration they expect, especially from partners," Terrell Strayhorn, a professor of education and psychology at Virginia Union University, told BI in 2023.

"Their superiority complex compels them to lash out β€” verbally, emotionally, psychologically, and physically β€” against those who disappoint them," Strayhorn said.

One way to soothe a narcissist is to empathize with their feelings, Greenberg said.Β 

If you are in a relationship with a narcissist, you might naturally have a lot of empathy. You may be able to use that trait to help control the situation.Β Β 

Greenberg suggested saying something like, "You must have felt very hurt by what I did. I can understand why you are feeling that way."

Stay calm, and use "we" language.
a couple arguing
Stay away from "I" or "you" statements.

SimonSkafar/Getty Images

Saying "we" rather than "I" or "you" includes yourself in the behavior, Greenberg said. The narcissist is probably angry that you dared to defend yourself, so you can try and remind them you're in this together and that it would be better for everyone to stop.

Scigliano also recommended remaining calm, not sharing your feelings, and sticking only to the facts.

"Expressing emotions makes it easier for the narcissist to twist the conversation around and work you into a tizzy," she said.

Redirect them by asking about a topic that interests them.
A couple hold hands
Try to divert their attention to a new topic.

Fiordaliso/Getty Images

Narcissists love talking about themselves and can be know-it-alls.

Dangle a new topic in front of their face to steer the conversation away from conflict. This might not be that effective in the midst of a fierce debate, but after some time has passed, the narcissist will probably take the bait.

Another tactic is to ask for advice. It's a slightly less transparent way of changing the subject that also makes the narcissist feel superior.Β 

Avoid taking the bait yourself.
couple after argument
Ignore their insults.

irinamunteanu/Getty Images

As retaliation for whatever hurt they feel you've caused them, narcissists will bring up past slights or accuse you of being selfish at that moment.Β 

One way to deal with a narcissist is to "avoid engaging with them on their level," Jacques said. That could mean biting your tongue, even as they're spewing insults at you.Β Β 

Even an innocuous statement might provide a narcissist with ammo, Jacques said. "Take those opportunities away from them and you remove their power."

Greenberg also said that by ignoring the name-calling, you can often avoid the fight. If you respond to it, things are likely to escalate, and you're giving the narcissist exactly what they want β€” your pain.

Remember to put yourself first.
A couple look forlorn while sitting on a bed
You might need to break things off with the narcissist in your life.

Delmaine Donson/Getty Images

Being in a romantic relationship with a narcissist can be an emotionally draining, damaging process. Using these methods to deal with a narcissist may help deescalate upsetting and potentially dangerous, situations.

For most people, though, breaking up with a narcissist is the better, safer option. The very nature of being a narcissist means they don't see anything wrong with themselves, so they are unlikely to ever change or seek help. Ultimately, your energy is better off being used elsewhere.

If you suspect you might be in an abusive relationship, or you know someone who is, there are services you can reach out to. The MyPlan App from One Love and the National Domestic Abuse Hotline are resources that can help.

This article was first published in February 2018 and was last updated on January 10, 2025.

Read the original article on Business Insider

I evacuated Los Angeles with my wife and 2 young sons. We're focusing on keeping things as routine as possible and reminding them they're safe.

10 January 2025 at 15:03
Homes burn above Pacific Coast Highway near Will Rodgers State Beach during the Palisades Fire on Wednesday, January 8, 2025, in Pacific Palisades, CA
The Palisades fire reached homes above the Pacific Coast Highway.

MediaNews Group/Orange County Register via Getty Images/MediaNews Group via Getty Images

  • Dr. Joel Warsh is a pediatrician based in Studio City.
  • He's also dad to two boys, a 5-year-old and 10-month-old.
  • His family had to evacuate their house early Wednesday morning.

This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Dr. Joel Warsh, a pediatrician with Integrative Pediatrics and Medicine in Los Angeles. It has been edited for length and clarity.

On Tuesday night, my wife and I put our sons to bed and then went to bed early ourselves, around 8 p.m. We knew we weren't likely to get a lot of sleep. Outside the back of our home, we could see the Palisades fire getting closer and closer.

It definitely wasn't the best sleep, but I managed to get some shut-eye. Then, at about 4:30 Wednesday morning, we got an alert that we needed to evacuate.

Our bags were already packed when we got the alert

We had already packed essentials like clothing, a few of the boys' favorite toys, and my wife's breast pump, plus our important documents like birth certificates. We grabbed the bags and our sons, who are 10 months and 5 years old, and drove to my in-laws' house in Studio City, near where I practice pediatrics.

My older son was excited to have a day with his grandparents. We talked with him a bit about the fires and he could see the smoke, but he didn't really understand what was going on.

By Friday the evacuation order for our home was lifted, but the fire still wasn't contained. I briefly returned home and saw that we only had slight wind damage. Inside, however, the air was hazy, like it gets when you're cooking something and burn it.

Even at my in-laws' house, the air quality wasn't great, so my family decided to head south toward San Diego for the weekend. We spent about $1,000 renting an Airbnb that could fit the extended family for two nights. Prices were actually cheaper than I thought they'd be, probably because people canceled trips to California.

I'm more worried about the emotional impact on kids than the physical

Earlier this week, I sent an email to all my patients. I reminded them to take their kids to the hospital if they have any acute trouble breathing. But if anything, I'm more worried about the mental and emotional impact of these fires on kids than the physical impact.

It's best if parents can help kids keep their routine as much as possible. We know from other disasters that when kids feel supported and know their parents are there for them, they fare better.

We'll do what we can to help and will remind our son he's safe

With my own son, I'm focusing on the helpers. Next week, we'll donate toys and other items to families who lost everything. Those families have much more acute stress to cope with than we do. How much to share about what's happening with children depends on the family and the individual child. While parents shouldn't hide things from kids, you don't want to tell them too much that it'll cause them stress, either.

Remind kids that they and their loved ones are safe. The rest you can figure out along the way, even if it needs to be done day by day. Helping children feel calm and supported rather than worried will help their long-term mental health.

Read the original article on Business Insider

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